Stingy restaurant behaviour has given me the ick

[HazelSchmazel]

This afternoon, I went on a second date with a guy I met on Tinder. Wasn't too sure after the first date, but I thought I'd give him the benefit of the doubt.

We had a nice meal and the bill was in the region of £50. When it was time to pay, I placed £30 (cash) in the middle of the table on the basis of £25 for my share and a £5 tip (our shares of food and drink were pretty much 50/50). He then proffered my £30 to the waiter, together with his credit card and said 'put £20 on my card'. So the poor waiting staff get no tip and my £5 effectively goes into his pocket!!! Uuuurgh - instant ick!

I should have said something, but I just wanted to get the fuck away from the knuckle dragger asap! Plus I was temporarily deaf from the thunderclap of my fanny slamming shut.

Now snuggled up with my cat, a bar of chocolate and am planning a Netflix binge, together with a future life of celibacy. Bliss!

Anyone else with a story of financially induced ick?

Please tell him and let us know what he says!

I assumed that he would realise that I intended a £5 tip. But fair point that it may not have been obvious.

The service was excellent, so I'm sure that wasn't the issue.

Some people are just downright contrary and confrontational, and like to needle & argue the toss with an OP just for the sheer hell of it. Happens a lot.

Good Lord, I do wonder sometimes how many of the posts on here are by actual women. If a man isn't bothered about making a good impression on you after only two dates, well, he's never going to be.

Hi tightwad just realised I paid 30 and you paid only 20. Here's my bank details to send me the fiver..
Op.

Oh - that is truly horrendous!!!

He paid the balance, the bill was covered. I would only see it as an issue if he didn't even it out next time. Like if you have five people having a few drinks together but only buy three rounds.

@S0livagant I can't recall the last time not to have tipped in a restaurant! I'm 62 and have always tipped. He could always have said '£25 on the card and being the change please'.
Fact remains him not intending to tip would have turned me off!

There will be no next time ....

I don't and most of the other people in my circle on a low wage don't. I find it odd to give pocket money to another adult who gets paid the same as I do.

My ex was so tight he wouldn’t even go to the bar and buy me a drink on a holiday I paid for;
we got back together for abit and he joked about not wanting to feed me his nice fish from the freezer, and also questioned who was paying for a £14pp meal he invited me to and he also earned more then twice what I do.
tight with money tight with love, he was shit in bed no idea about forplay at all

Can’t speak for the OP, but someone whose default position is not to tip in a restaurant wouldn’t get a second date with me either.

I'd have had to speak up at the time and put him straight!

was temporarily deaf from the thunderclap of my fanny slamming shut.

Pmsl. Literally spat my cuppa out

This would sooo give me the ick as well. What a total knob, please don't see him again and if he asks why, you should totally tell him it's because of what he did, a night in with chocolate and Netflix sounds so much better than wasting another second with a stingy twat like that

If I'd had an expensive dish, lot of sides etc and my companion had had something smaller and cheaper, I'd not automatically think okay it's going no further. It might depend if I was in well paid work and the other person doing something less well rewarded. And on how much I'd enjoyed their company

But if it turned out to be a pattern, then yes, it would be a problem.

That’s completely up to you, but your view on tipping isn’t relevant to the OP’s ick. People are entitled not to tip. Other people are equally entitled to find non-tippers a colossal turn-off.

Me too!

Definitely one to avoid. How mean. It’s disgraceful that he took from you and the waiting staff. Enjoy not being with this idiot.

Fair enough.

Something that would give me the ick would be ignoring a homeless person if they could afford to offer to buy them something to eat or drink.

Even if he "planned to buy her a drink next time" that still means he didn't tip the waitress and has meanwhile made off with £5 of OP's money. I think it was abundantly clear that OP was leaving a tip. I even know that and I come from a largely non-tipping country. He was just cheap, very cheap.

There is zero chance there would be a next time if a date did this. It's tight at best.

Few things worse than a tight person. I remember a colleague who thought it was ok to leave a £10 tip on a £300 bill and that was many years ago.

Haha this made me laugh! Thanks OP