Out of interest, what would you do if your long term dp spat in your face?

[Namechanged11111]

Just that really? 😞

Leave him. I would leave him.

I agree with this. I would also add that the threat of suicide is also upping the violence in the relationship.

Having already spat at you and threatened suicide it will be much easier, in his mind, to turn the physical violence on you. He will be able to justify it to himself, seeing himself as a victim.

Plan to leave ASAP. He isn't going to suddenly 'see the light'.

I’d sooner be punched than spat at

I couldn’t get over it

Please, please for the love of God, get out or get him out. It won't end there. It will be punching soon. He's a violent man, he's wearing you down, he's blaming you for his violence. Please contact Women's Aid and listen to them.

I'd lose my shit if my partner did something like that. But don't do that - just make plans to get away and stay away.

I hope you are safe

OP I don't think he WILL hit you - he's too sneaky and clever to do that coz he knows you'll tell him to leave. However, if the house were his he likely would start hitting.

I think he'll just keep on spitting at you, verbally abusing you, using his mouth as a weapon to say vile things and a hundred other sly passive aggressive nasty things, like "accidentally " breaking your belongings.

It's over. Ficus now on starting afresh. You've got a good nice calm peaceful life ahead of you get rid of him. I hope you do.

And next time it will be a slap. And then a punch. But because it doesn’t leave a mark, you’ll forgive him. And then he’ll stop you doing things you love. This is how the cycle perpetuates itself. If you have any self-respect, you would get out now, for whatever reason he is in a bad way and as a result, he is not right for you. He can’t give you what you need in a relationship.

The fact he sees his abuse as your fault only makes this 1000 times more toxic.

Don’t rationalise it don’t seek to excuse it. You’ve come here with one simple question, and the fact is you already know the answer to your question.

Spitting in someone’s face is assault, OP. Of course I would leave if my partner spat in my face. I’d probably be speaking to the police as well.

As you know full well, your partner is physically and emotionally abusive and you need to leave him, now.

What are you still doing with this excuse for a man?

He threatened to kill himself?

What bullocks. He won’t do that. Abusers don’t kill themselves. He’ll just carry on abusing you. You’d be lucky if he killed himself TBH.

Leave the piece of shit - if you don’t, you’ll be the one leaving. In a bodybag.

Men like this don’t change. They just get worse.

Bin him off on the spot.

Spitting at someone is showing that you have nothing but absolute contempt for them. It would be something that ends a relationship instantly for me.

@Namechanged11111 he's been slowly pushing boundaries with the rough handling, pushing etc. He spat on you because he knew you'd let him get away with it.

As much as it hurts, you have to end it. The next time will be a punch then more and it will ALWAYS be blamed on you.

He does it because he can. Ideally, you'd phone 101 and report him but I know that is sometimes too daunting to face.

OP, this is NOT love.

This

This vile excuse fir a man has to leave, are you married, what's the home set up. Block him on your phone, are you safe.

Dump him on the spot and report him for assault.

This sounds 100% like what he is attempting. Laying the foundation to make her look like the bad guy

Do you have any options op- people to stay with? You say partner so your not married. Kids?

whats your thoughts on things? Are you thinking of leaving (you should) or staying?

if you cant face it right now you can start to do some bits in the background eg look at your finances, savings, flats/house shares in area. Build up a deposit. Hide passport, birth certificate, other important docs

Goodness me, how bad does it need to get before a relationship is over? why would he commit suicide when splitting up would be so much easier???? If he doesn’t dump you because he finds you so awful, then you should certainly and most definitely dump him and start living a happy life without the abusive git. And before his violence towards you gets even worse.

Isn't spitting at someone classed as assault in the U.K? I think it counts as that if you do it at a police officer anyway.

It's disgusting OP and I feel sad for you. He has utter contempt for you. It's poison to have someone like that in your life.

I'd be making plans to leave the relationship as soon as I could safely do so. Deliberately spitting at a person is an assault, and is widely considered to be one of the most pernicious forms of assault, because it conveys absolute contempt.

You are being abused. He is likely to escalate to blows.

Leave as soon as you can.

The suicide threat is almost certainly empty, said as another means of controlling you. And even if he did act on it, I'd say that's a "him problem".

So what did you do when he did it again. Please tell me that was the end of your relationship.

This is an abusive relationship and you need to leave. Raise the bar OP, pushing and prodding is not acceptable either. Calling you a stupid cunt, spitting in your face, it's all abuse. I hope that you can see that and that you take steps to leave this abusive thug once and for all.

I would leave. Today.