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Threesome went wrong

838 replies

Cherryblossom85 · 22/07/2024 10:29

Hi all I'm posting this for a couple of reasons really.
One being I have noone else to get this all of my chest too as I haven't told any friends about it and Two to warn other how a potential threesome could go.

So here goes
I've been seeing a man for about 9 months, he has always treated me very well all the things I had been looking for including No games. Grounded. Mature. Kind . Funny and we have always just clicked from day one.

A couple of months ago we spoke about sexual fantasies his being a threesome, he said he would never make me feel pressured to do this though & was happy for it just to be a fantasy. As time went on I felt more comfortable with him sexually & said I would like to explore this with him .
He was clearly very excited & got to work straight away on joining dating sites & sites aimed for swinging / threesomes.
I left all that side to him as I'm not really into messaging people back & forth.
Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago he msg me and told me he has found someone, she would like to explore with us as a couple

He sent me the conversation between them and the photos they had exchanged, it was all very open and he said I could change my mind at any time ( which I have felt I can do)
We had arranged to meet her this friday just gone.
The past 2 weeks leading up to it, she is all he has spoken about it was like he was obsessed , i just said to myself well once it is out if his system maybe he wint be going on and on about her so much.
To cut a long story short ... we met her friday evening, I found her very attractive and there was an instant chemistry between us.
We all chatted for a while and then she made it clear she would like to take things further that evening so we booked into a hotel.
The thing is , she seemed very keen on me and was all over me , kissing touching etc. The man I'm seeing was initially into it he then turned and said to her can I join in now and she said no not yet I just want to be with her for a minute , so he respected that.
As things progressed she only wanted me , I stopped and asked her are you actually gay? Or not attracted to my boyfriend? That's ok if either of those things are correct however we were after a threesome, she then kissed him for a while and they started doing other things together ... I could see her actually wince though as if she just was not attracted to him in the slightest ... she kept turning back towards me and when he put his hand on her leg to get involved she said no and moved his hand off her.
It was all a bit awkward however I was quite enjoying being with her , I looked over at my boyfriend and he looked very angry , I had never seen him like this before!
She then went to the bathroom and he turned to me and said that he doenst want the threesome to continue and that he was going to offer to pay for her cab.
He was very short with me and it was clear he wasnt having a good time so I agreed.
When she came out of the bathroom I was polite and friendly and said it wasnt working for us as a couple and we would call her a cab. I was so embarrassed about my boyfriend's behaviour as he was grumpy now and didnt speak to her before she left. I walked her out to the cab gave a hug and said goodbye.
When I walked back into the hotel room my boyfriend was very cross and said shes obsessed with you! I said to him I'm so confused this is what your fantasy you have said for a long time that you wanted to see me with another woman .I understand she was more attracted to me then him however I couldnt help this.
Anyway his behaviour has now given me the ick and I dont think I want to see him anymore!. We went to sleep that evening and the next morning we went for breakfast he moaned about how expensive the bill for breakfast was ( it really wasn't) I had never seen him behave like this before now.
I offered to pay for it just to keep him quiet and to stop the moaning although it was his turn to pay as we often take turns.
I paid for the breakfast we got up to leave and his whole attitude was miserable. I tried talking to him and he was having none of it , again something I've never seen in him before as we have always communicated well.
By Saturday afternoon I was ready to go home , we had the weekend planned together but something had switched inside me after seeing him like this and I made my excuses and said I needed to get back as my children were coming back early . I made it up but I just had to leave , I couldn't stand to be around him.
I feel like theres no going back from this.
Any advice over what to do please?
Thanks in advance

OP posts:
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7
KatiesMumWoof · 22/07/2024 11:18

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@courgettes4eva

so why open a thread about a threesome then?

more curious than you care to admit??

Wendycoping · 22/07/2024 11:18

Hilarious. Good for you OP. Glad you enjoyed it and so funny that it wasn't what your bloke thought!

janeintheframe · 22/07/2024 11:19

Op did you tell gin you were bi sexual or attracted to women before hand? The fact yoy are, then got carried away, and she didn’t fancy him, and obvs knew you fancied her, likely came as a major shock to him, so was he prepared. Sure his behaviour was like a spoiled child, but was he prepared?

Hb7x3 · 22/07/2024 11:19

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Yes, because you should zip up your fanny forever after having kids

JMSA · 22/07/2024 11:19

Ha ha, she was more into you than him and he is throwing his toys out the pram!

spiderdave · 22/07/2024 11:19

Me and DH have joked about this happening if we were to explore the threesome idea! 😂

I agree with others though, ditch him, call her!! His behaviour would give me the ick too.

NewGirlinClass · 22/07/2024 11:19

When you saw that things were getting awkward, why did you not fuck him. The extra could have done things with you or you could have stopped and let her take over with him? Then you would all be friends still.

Do have a date with her and see how you get on. It really can be nice.

Runsyd · 22/07/2024 11:19

This is genuinely hilarious. Absolute man child fucked around and found out. I wouldn't have paid for his breakfast, I'd have walked out of there laughing while I texted that lovely woman to see if she'd like to date.

FailBetter · 22/07/2024 11:19

ilovepixie · 22/07/2024 10:54

Weird!

It used to be a standard phrase on here for anything risque, sordid or grim! Grin
Now I guess it needs changing to Queen Consort or King! Wink Crown

MounjaroUser · 22/07/2024 11:19

So he thought he'd be like a dog with two dicks, didn't he? He chose the woman. He sweet talked her into it. He was over the moon at the impending shagging. I would have lost any interest in him by then, tbh.

Plantparent · 22/07/2024 11:20

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This didn't affect her children in any way whatsoever? This sounds incredibly judgemental and pearl clutching, just because she happens to be a parent...

rwalker · 22/07/2024 11:20

I sorry u should of put a stop to it when it became obvious she wasn’t interested in a threesome
how would you of felt if they would of just shagged excluded you and left you sat there

the idea of threesomes is everyone is involved

JMSA · 22/07/2024 11:21

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Honestly, why even bother replying? I'm not into kinks and still wouldn't have written this pointless, bitchy response.

ARichtGoodDram · 22/07/2024 11:21

Cherryblossom85 · 22/07/2024 11:16

Yes I have thought this through & no I wouldnt if liked that. I have tried to talk to him alot since Friday and hes having none of it that's the issue for me really , not that he didnt like it but his communication and shutting down and being rude since.

so he pushed his fantasy, he did all the organising and because it’s not gone his way he’s in a huff and refusing to talk.

What an immature idiot.

Run away. Especially as you now may want to explore with women. You don’t want a huffy idiot curtailing your freedom.

ChilliSquib · 22/07/2024 11:22

I think you are right and there is no coming back from it.

You haven't put a foot wrong I don't think.

AndForAFortnightThereWeWereForever · 22/07/2024 11:22

You know you need to dump this creep @Cherryblossom85

And isn't it funny how, when men want a threesome, (with them and their female partner,) it's ALWAYS another woman that they want. Funny that. Wink

Also funny that the other woman wanted you. 😆

needsomewarmsunshine · 22/07/2024 11:22

I would dump him OP and contact the other woman, that sounds potentially good.
Why do some people regard being faithful as being vanilla? I don't get what is boring about it. I was pretty wild when I was young and before settling down, but after nearly 25 years with dh I've never looked at anyone else. I don't need to.
Must we be exception to the rule.

AdoraBell · 22/07/2024 11:23

He sounds bloody immature OP and as pp said, he probably expected this to all about him having all the attention.

Hb7x3 · 22/07/2024 11:23

FailBetter · 22/07/2024 11:19

It used to be a standard phrase on here for anything risque, sordid or grim! Grin
Now I guess it needs changing to Queen Consort or King! Wink Crown

We all know what they're like with those leaked messages lol

BananaLambo · 22/07/2024 11:23

Haha! He thought it would be some sort of porny fantasy of two women performing for him while he’s the centre of attention and instead he became the spare wheel. Now he’s in a huff because she fancied you and didn’t fancy him!

Icannoteven · 22/07/2024 11:24

😂 sounds like he imagined a threesome would involve having two women focussing on his pleasure, worshipping him and what he got was two women ignoring him and focussing on their own. Dump him, call her.

JFDIYOLO · 22/07/2024 11:24

You don't need any advice at all, do you.

But OK. What happened there was man and dick were not expected centre of attention.

Women were independently doing something they were both enjoying and he was not included / centred.

Man not receiving his due respect.

Man then threw toys out of pram, stropped and sulked.

Woman then attempts to appease, treading on eggshells, taking on extra responsibility including looking after third party and paying for breakfast.

Woman attempts to steady the ship and get things nice again.

Man continues grumping for England and woman comes onto Mumsnet asking how to cope with him.

Details aside, I see this every feckin day here.

Have a freshly baked and still warm from the oven LTB.

PaleSunshineOfHope · 22/07/2024 11:24

fluffiphlox · 22/07/2024 10:42

How unlike the home life of our own dear queen.

I suspect the current Queen might be more open-minded than the last one.

MyBreezyPombear · 22/07/2024 11:25

I'm another one who finds it funny. It was his fantasy, what he wanted and he thought he'd have two women fawning over him.

Turns out the two women prefereed each other and the other women seemed to not find him attractive at all.

I'd dump him, mainly because of his reaction and I'd get in contact with the other woman. It sounds like you want to explore your sexuality and you two seemed to enjoy each others company.

KatiesMumWoof · 22/07/2024 11:25

ilovepixie · 22/07/2024 10:54

Weird!

@ilovepixie

nah, it's older than old. It WAS funny the first few times. It got old quickly!

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