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Original poster

New partner won't wear a condom

251 replies

Nofruitscones · 09/07/2024 14:44

Recently started seeing a lovely man ♥️ Met through a mutual friend and hit it off instantly, despite me never wanting to get involved with a man ever again.
Never thought I'd change my mind but gosh he's totally amazing!

We have met a few times now and it's all been lovely and have discussed progressing our friendship and moving things along... 😉

However... he is not keen to use condoms 🙁 He's been married a long time but says don't have sex and I believe him. I really feel like I want to insist on condoms though but oh my goodness, I have proper caught the feels and WANT him!

What to do MN?

OP posts:
TheCultureHusks · 09/07/2024 16:07

WOW.

A lovely man does not refuse to wear a condom.

He’s a scuzz.

That’s before you even get to the married bit!!!

YUK. You are a fool, OP!

greengreyblue · 09/07/2024 16:08

Run for your life!!

betterangels · 09/07/2024 16:09

Seriously? Have a word with yourself.

betterangels · 09/07/2024 16:10

PossumintheHouse · 09/07/2024 15:31

Come on OP, come baaaack... we're waiting on the drip feed update, where you tell us he has confided in you that he has herpes, but he isn't having an outbreak, so it's all OK. And he loves you and has never cheated on his wife with anyone else, you're the first. So it's all OK, right?

OP is special.

SecretBirthday · 09/07/2024 16:12

This reply has been deleted

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I mean there are fairly regular posts from MN members who would rather have their fanjo sewn shut than shag their DH, so it’s not that unbelievable. Quite why the OP wants him so badly is anyone’s guess though…

KikiShaLeeBopDeBopBop · 09/07/2024 16:14

he is not keen to use condoms 🙁 He's been married a long time but says don't have sex and I believe him

@Nofruitscones and how many other women has he slept with without using condoms, op? Because chances are, you're not the first.

Liv999 · 09/07/2024 16:17

So he's married and won't use condoms? And also claiming he's not sleeping with his wife? Are you that gullible?

Getonwitit · 09/07/2024 16:22

Gosh, don't you have any morals or standards ?

Pikopikoputput · 09/07/2024 16:22

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Variolia · 09/07/2024 16:23

Er, well, you walk away because he’s married.

Why do you even have to ask?

Restinggoddess · 09/07/2024 16:24

Is this a reverse?

SecretBirthday · 09/07/2024 16:27

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

MN have already taken the thread down, investigated, reinstated and posted a troll hunting warning.

Ethylred · 09/07/2024 16:27

EBearhug · 09/07/2024 14:55

Whether or not he's having sex with his wife isn't very relevant. Wait till he's got divorced, else it's going to get messy.

But - if you meet a man, any man you want to have sex with, and he doesn't want to wear condoms, then no sex until you have both had full STI screening that comes back clear. Don't just take his word for it, either - ask to see the text/email/letter. This should be the case even if you are using a coil/the Pill/ injections/implants/ whatever.

This is excellent advice and very easy to implement. In London, any way. See https://www.shl.uk/ and follow the steps.

ladykale · 09/07/2024 16:28

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betterangels · 09/07/2024 16:30

If you meet a man, any man you want to have sex with, and he doesn't want to wear condoms, then no sex until you have both had full STI screening that comes back clear. Don't just take his word for it, either - ask to see the text/email/letter.

Agree. Important advice.

Pikopikoputput · 09/07/2024 16:31

SecretBirthday · 09/07/2024 16:27

MN have already taken the thread down, investigated, reinstated and posted a troll hunting warning.

Show quote history

Thanks I’m fairly new here…what exactly goes on in an investigation to prove a post is legitimate?

SecretBirthday · 09/07/2024 16:33

Pikopikoputput · 09/07/2024 16:31

Thanks I’m fairly new here…what exactly goes on in an investigation to prove a post is legitimate?

Show quote history

I think they check posting history, username history, IP address against the previously banned posters list, etc.

CactusMactus · 09/07/2024 16:34

You should totally have unprotected sex with a married man.... Can't think of any good reasons not to...

quockerwodger · 09/07/2024 16:35

Sounds more of cuntish man than a lovely.one.

Pick your bar up off the floor FFS, set it a bit higher.

Marblessolveeverything · 09/07/2024 16:37

That isn't a red flag............it's a huge line of them. Upgrade.

Chickennoodlesss · 09/07/2024 16:38

I'm assuming and hoping this is an error and OP was meant to say 'he was married long time ago' and is single now...

ArabellaScott · 09/07/2024 16:41

Ew, what a creep.

Have some self respect, OP.

Danceinthenight · 09/07/2024 16:43

You want to sleep with a married man and cause trauma towards a woman for your selfish needs find a man who’s single you arsehole

Bigearringsbigsmile · 09/07/2024 16:43

It would be an instant no from me. It shows disrespect, lack of care , poor morals and bad hygiene. Nope.

Bigearringsbigsmile · 09/07/2024 16:46

I missed the married bit- ffs!!! NO!!!