Most bizarre first date ...

[nonspap]

I went on a first date last night. We're both in our early fifties. We met for drinks from six. I was meeting others for dinner at eight. At seven his sister rang to see if he'd join them
For dinner .. he asked me there and then what my plans were so I told him.
He was a bit put out as o think he thought we were going f to have some sort of booze filled session.
He told me that his family would be passing down .. we were seated outside the bar.
Anyway .. at ten to eight he said ' there they are' jumped up and said ' right, I'm
Off' and left me there !!!!
I was shocked.
He started texting me then saying he had a great evening !!!
I told him how exceptionally rude he was and that nothing like that had never happened
Me Before .
He then replied by saying ' But you said you did t want to
Meet them..'
I'm actually laughing as I think about it now but I was disgusted at the time ..
I can't get over how he thought I'd or indeed any woman would accept that shit!
Old me would have possibly given him a second chance. Healed me is like, jog on.

I think the abrupt exit was because you'd made it clear you didn't want to meet his sister.

So, when she arrived, of course he spotted her, said goodbye and left. Were you expecting her to wait patiently while he spent 5 minutes thanking you for fitting him into your busy schedule?

2hrs is apt for a first date ffs. What the hell is going on on this thread.

Let's flip this. Man and Woman go on date. man tells woman he is leaving early to have dinner with friends. Woman calls her sister for backup and leaves 10 mins b4 he's due to meet his mates. Eveyone on here would tell her he was an ass hat and she had a good escape. I think you were rude from the outset.

I think he sounds very awkward. I’d give him a miss, too. Because at that age if he can’t be more gracious in a first date things will only get worse.

I'm actually surprised at the standard that a person would tolerate when it comes to basic manners. Jumping up abruptly and literally running down the road after his sister and leaving me there without a mannerly goodbye was rude in my eyes

I'd have done that, I dislike drawn out goodbyes, specifically if I'd just been rejected.

I'm with the others who can't see that he did much wrong. OK the bye was maybe a bit abrupt but OP didn't behave brilliantly either. So I'd call it even!

I agree with a pp that you think you're "healed" but what that actually means is you're now being overly harsh and critical.

And as most on this thread agree only telling someone halfway through a date that you’ve got other plans and they’re on a ticking clock is extremely rude.

So it’s ok for you to be rude but when he reacts badly it’s him that’s in only one at fault? You think he should accept your lack of manners not telling him in advance of the date you were squeezing him into a time slot. He probably thought you were making an excuse to cut the date short and felt awkward

But this is one of those threads where whatever anyone says, you’re so convinced your in the right that you won’t accept any other opinion.

Only as rude as you making other plans from 8pm. One of you had to leave by 8pm. It might as well have been him.

He was rude. Meeting for a drink/drinks at 6 is not a commitment to spend the evening together; in fact, it’s good to have something to go on to. He was rude in that, at the goodbye stage, one or other of you had to have the chance to say ‘well, this was nice, will we do it again’ or ‘lovely to meet you, but I’m not sure we click.’ But he dashed off which was discourteous.

Nope, I don't see what he did wrong either.

I'd say it's even.

At what point were you going to tell him you were leaving at 8? It's bad manners to meet someone for an evening and not tell them you have plans with someone else. It stops them making other plans.

Yes he may have been abrupt but you'd made it clear you didn't want to meet his family, so he was probably super aware of that.

He knew we
We're meeting for just a drink or two.
I told him I would be meeting family for dinner two hours later.
I thought that this was straight and honest from the get go .

I agree.

The OP sounds like hard work.

You were disgusted that you didn't get a mannerly good bye from someone you told when you met that you had other plans for the rest of the evening that didn't include him?
I'd let this pass although it doesn't appear you'll be meeting again any time soon.

You were meeting friends at 8:00. He left at 7:50

Can't see what the problem is

He was meeting his sister at the same location as your date, the same location you were also meeting your friends at 8pm?
He could've said goodbye in a less flustered way but apart from that I'd hardly call him rude.
You were the one who said you were doing something else at 8pm.
If you act that way with such a minor indiscretion I feel you're going to struggle to get much out of dating.

You haven’t lived if that’s the rudest thing you’ve ever experienced

Is that honestly the most bizarre date you've ever been on? A bit of an awkward exit followed by a polite text?

It was a first date. Maybe a proper goodbye and a plan to meet again?

I've just thought, the only thing that could be a bit fishy, and this is at a push...
His 'sister' was actually another date, and he didn't want you to cross paths as she'd inevitably be perplexed when you referred to her as his sibling?
Other than that the poor bloke's done nothing really wrong.

But… you said you didn’t want to meet them?

Your OP indicates that you only told him you had other plans when his sister called mid date. Is that not correct?

Yes that's correct. I also said that I was free to meet for a drink or two at a given time , so he knew that was my intention.

I've had worse . One drinks date, we left the bar together and then he said goodbye outside the bar! Didnt even walk me to my car.