Quick dating advice!

[pubertyalloveragain]

So he organises (enthusiastically) a third date for tomorrow but doesn't get in touch all week?

What to do?

I have a friend (former romantic interest) like this - even now we are mates we get into situations sometimes where his texting is so ambiguous and he thinks he is being as clear as day! So I feel your pain!

I'm sure I follow what's happened... He said he was confused and now you're glad you didn't ghost him... So you've reconciled your plans? Or, something else?

If you don't mind sharing, I'm rooting for you to have dodged a bullet if that's what he is, or, if it's a misunderstanding and he's lovely really... I hope the best for you either way.

The guy is not interested. Honestly when they are they set up dates every single weekend without fail. You’re not left in doubt.

I agree with this. 100%

It’s really not. He showed you he wasn’t interested, you hit in touch showing him you were keen and he’s thought ‘why not’

I don't understand this. What do you mean?

Did you end up meeting him again Op?

So yes we met up. He messaged just before checking we were still meeting up, I laughed and asked must we confirm again! We had a lovely evening, he took me out to a really lovely place for dinner and told me walking out how much he likes me. I'm so cynical about everything that I am finding it hard to trust anything that comes out of anyone's mouth.

We talked about loads last night, really good conversation. I mentioned how dreadful texting is and today he's just been leaving me voice notes instead :) oh I don't know it's all a lot of work!

My marriage broke up and honestly I have no idea what to expect from life next.

It was really relaxed and enjoyable. Not sure how things progress with dating anymore, these days. Anyway certainly a good third date and good to have had a conversation about how he thought I wasn't interested and visa versa.

Yeah maybe of course this is a massive possibility.

He did get someone to cover for him in work in the end so we could go out.

Keen to know what you guys think, obviously you don't him or me :)

I’m always cynical and posted that before you said you’d had another date.

Its early days so just enjoy without too many expectations and who knows 😊

Personally, I'd give him the benefit of the doubt, but without throwing all caution to the wind.
It's perfectly reasonable, if you're not sure about someone you don't know, for him to feel the same.
It could be that you seem keen so now he's like, 'ok great, I've got a live one on the hook...'
Or
He's thinking 'yay, I thought I'd blown it, but it was crossed wires, happy days, let's see where this goes'

Either is plausible.
So just take it slow, enjoy the flutters, but keep your head and just let trust develop as and when you can see that he's earned some trust by being consistent and considerate.
If you get intimate before you are certain his interest is not just getting his leg over, do that only if you'd enjoy it for what it is even if he's just playing.

Op, you have quite an ambiguous texting style, I think (going by your posts on here), so it may well have just been miscommunication.
Hope it all goes well, going forward.

OP I'm reserving judgement till he sends you a video of the "wanking-into-a-sock-scenario".

I'm such a Bad Person.

Seriously though - it sounds like things have possibilities now.

Maybe he's literally useless at texting.

And making plans.

If you end up getting married you'll need to make all the arrangements, @pubertyalloveragain

😂

Hey thanks everyone. Real on the spot support! We'll see where it goes, it certainly tempered my expectations which is no bad thing. @UpThereForThinkingDownThereForDancing I think you're on the money. I have a feeling, well through a bit of chat, that he was very badly burned last year and well so was I. Both of us quite truthfully I think admitted that neither of us know what we want, so yes let's just see where this goes. To be fair I am not sure our lifestyles right now are remotely compatible but well we get along when we see eachother.

Thanks all again xx

Just something about this wording has made me need to speak up. All may well be 100% true both sides (yours, his), but the whole (from him) thing about being burned and not knowing what he wants - has been used on me, friends of mine etc by guys who just want something casual and have zero intention of being reliable.

Hey ladies, can we pick this up again 😂??

Go for it.

It'll be a distraction from the election.

What's he done now?
Proposed marriage?

Haha, em No..... @TheShellBeach @UpThereForThinkingDownThereForDancing - God the election eughhhhh. Yes hopefully I can make this a little more interesting 🤔 hope so, it's grim out there.

Sorry this is such a ridiculous hand hold. I think I need to use this whole thing as a wise up...

Will gather my thoughts and post. In a nutshell J am trying to figuring if because of my new circumstances, single again mid life etc, am I an anxious bunny boiler that just needs to ease up and have fun or am I not and just reading situations better.

Hey so last post was our evening out last week.

Probably given the light chat that night about communication, he's left mainly voice notes over the weekend.

So I forgot to text when I got home and he was all over me in phone on Sat checking I got home okay. Sunday got a lovely voice note at the end of the saying saying how he'd had a crazy intense weekend in work, lots of drama, he was wrecked etc etc and looks like he won't be able to get a day off all week (fired people, few left etc) and that all weekend with all the drama he had me in then back of his head and that he couldn't wait to see me but couldn't see anything working out till the following week. All sounded v plausible and if I wasn't so skeptical very sweet and a bit hot.

Brief message on Monday, had a brief opp to see him but I couldn't and to be honest I don't want to be available all the time at his whim. Arranged to meet next Tuesday.

So today no contact since Monday at all - like nothing at all. This is normal right? Or what? He is quite explicit about what he wants and I just cannot decipher if this is just a sex conquest for him. Surely if youre interested you drop them a quick note during the week?

Clearly I am bloody terrified of investing in this guy, but I do like him. I suppose in the background I've a fairly fragile heart but I do want to meet someone. Hence all the caution.

I do really I sound very inexperienced but after a marriage break up, I realise that I actually am.

OP Did you shag him last time?