Long term Friend has sent me a D**k Pic!

[Menopausalgoddess]

Hi guys, would appreciate your input. I had a male friend (51) whom I’ve been very close with for many years send me a completely unsolicited D pic. I woke up to it Sunday morning via WhatsApp. He’d sent it around 4am with a comment that said ‘you’re so wrong…but so right!’ EWWW! This friend does have substance abuse issues but I still don’t see that as an excuse. I haven’t replied and from my side the friendship is over. I would never feel safe around him again. I feel sickened and violated. We have mutual friends who will at some point realise I am no longer around as we generally meet at this creepoid’s house. Would you tell them the truth if they ask questions regarding my absence? I’m aware that unsolicited D pics are prevalent from online strangers these days unfortunately but has anyone received one from a long-standing male friend? How did you respond? What was the outcome? TIA

They dread ridicule but only from people they respect like their wife or boss or whatever. If you’re getting dick pics or any other kind of flashing forget it, you are not in that category and any response at all is part of the fun for them.

I would have messaged back saying mate thats not you your smaller than that😂.

I agree that no reply is the best reply.

He is demanding a reaction from you . +He is a pervert.

Well done on not hiding the truth from other people. You didn't deserve this and should not feel you need to cover it up!

If you did reply:
'The small regard you had for our friendship is noted.'

or just
'What a pity.'

This!
He's a vile, dirty pig! Ugh! I got sent a couple of these filthy, foul pictures years ago and I was shocked and horrified, I went mad at the senders but they didn't care, only sent filthy messages to me and I'd not said nor done anything to even hint that I would welcome that sort of thing. It was done to put me down and to intimidate me, an indication of serious contempt for women and IMO, a form of sexual abuse but sadly it wasn't a crime then. It is now, so in your shoes I'd cut him off completely, block him, blank him totally and if he ever so much as said one wrong word to me, I'd go to the police with the picture and prosecute! I hope you've kept it but archived it so you can use it for your own welfare if you need to? Men who do this have bad intentions and a horrible attitude to women. It's a form of sexual assault and they are sex offenders. They need to be made to face severe consequences!

Ridicule doesn't put them all off. I chatted to one guy on OLD who was obsessed with his small penis and wanted someone who would belittle him about it. He wouldn't talk about anything else. So I blocked him. But he'd have probably delighted in someone telling him his dick pic was inadequate.

And if you thought the man was a friend, it's a breach of trust as well! Bad enough getting one from someone you've never met, but from someone you know, consider a friend and trusted, it's even more horrifying!

that comment sounds like a reply to someone. I think he sent it to the wrong person.

you're close, just ask him.

He decided to shoot his shot in quite a dramatic way, failed miserably. I honestly don't know how any man, of any age would ever think it was going to yield a positive response.

Why do men think women want to see this? I don't get it 😕

I could see why you would believe this a possibility from my OP. I have mentioned in subsequent posts why I believe otherwise. There were signs, I just didn’t see them. I have remembered more just today. The last time I saw him I wore shorts, which is unusual for me. He mentioned that my legs looked ‘nice and shiny’?! And then a couple of minutes later briefly touched my thigh and said ‘you’re cold’, I felt uncomfortable but didn’t want to make a big deal of something possibly innocent. When I got up to leave my underwear rode up and was briefly exposed and he made a comment. I feel a fool for excusing his crass behaviour.

Even without these signs the fact that he hasn’t deleted the pic or apologised (if it was in fact intended for someone else) doesn’t add up. Surely he would have been waiting for a reply from the intended recipient and at some point realised his mistake. It’s been two days at this point.

He meant to send it and I’ve finally seen him for who he is.

I don't believe they do think we want to. I believe they get off on knowing we don't want to.
They are flashers. The thrill for them is our non-consent.

I have kept it after some editing (which can be removed) unfortunately the image is burned into my brain now! 😡

sorry this happened to you, it’s more horrendous than I fathomed. Thanks for understanding.

Block him. Archive the chat so you don't have to see it.
If friends ask, tell them the truth and that it was that or reporting him.

Yep this is pretty much the path I’m taking. I archived the chat yesterday, I couldn’t stomach seeing it in my inbox.

Perhaps ive been looking at this all the wrong way and it is actually a way to shock, knowing you dont want it but that the image will be burnt on the back of the recipients retinas as sounds the case here. But either way, how can it not ruin a friendship, or does the bloke think it'll get laughed off as horseplay until such a point when the unforgettable image becomes attractive. Its some fked up logic.

I would reply ‘why have you sent me a picture of a child’s penis? I am reporting you to the police, you’re disgusting’

"Weird pic to send me but thanks you've just reminded me I've run out of button mushrooms"

Why do people minimise this behaviour.
Commenting on size is not a remotely appropriate response.

Not funny

Yes, I would. Just a simple “the dick pic and comment he sent me was unacceptable and ended our friendship” will suffice.

He was never your friend.

Ths majority of men cannot truly be friends with a woman and he's one of them.
(Some women likewise).

They think with their dicks.

He was clearly already a bit flirty/touchy/non platonic and when you mentioned you were in a hook up situation, he just jumped to "she does casual sex! She likes dick! She'll probably fuck me too, I'll show her my erect dick and it'll kick off from there".

That is literally how basic they are.

Chris Rock - I think it was Chris Rock - said in stand up comedy once that men are perpetually thinking "want some dick?" and the more I see of them, he's absolutely right.

A lot of women think dick pics are some kind of power move or abusive thing.

Some instances may have that dynamic, but I think women totally underestimate how much of it is truly the result of how they think, they are literally thinking and therefore enacting,;
"Are you up for sex with me? Here's my dick, I can get a decent erection and this is the size and shape of it".
They are genuinely thinking the woman will be interested/impressed/turned on/it will hopefully give a positive response.

I've had this from when my primary school friend's little brother, who had a bit of a thing for me, dropped his trousers and undies in front of me when I was in their home. He was too young to be pitching sex lol, but the same principle of "look, this is what I've got, do you like this" etc. applied.

I’m shocked by the minimising on this thread! If you reframe the CRIME of sending an unsolicited genital photo as “pissed bloke mate sending a silly pic of his knob”, it doesn’t make the crime any less real. Just like indecent exposure isn’t less of a horrible crime when it’s given the jolly name of “flashing”.

I’m glad there’s plenty of support for the OP on this thread, and others pointing out the misogyny.

unfortunately the image is burned into my brain now! 😡

I'm not actually joking when I say you should probably look at a load of dicks online. It might dilute/supercede the image of his specimen. It'll be like 'and another one, and another one...".

Delete him from your life. He's a creeper.