Is he cheating

[Lostandconfus3d]

Is he cheating?

My partner (M50) has been acting weird towards me (F37) for a while. Sex hasn’t been as frequent. He goes between being lovely to acting like he doesn’t want me around and snapping with me.

A couple of weeks ago I found viagra in a suitcase he uses when we travel or he goes away for work trips. There was only 1 left in the pack of 8. I questioned him on this and he blew up claiming he uses them for me when he has had a few drinks and can’t preform. I cannot think of one occasion when he has been drunk where he could have taken them and if he did it didn’t work!

I chose to rug sweep thinking maybe he was telling the truth or I was mistaken. Last week he was being super off with me didn’t want me around. He told me Thursday night he was having an early night and said he would speak to me the next day. When I woke to message him in the morning he had been online at 3.13am although he had told me he was sleeping by 10pm. When I asked if he slept well he said he went straight to sleep after he said goodnight.

I went to his house the next morning and all of my possessions were “hidden” in the spare room with the door closed. Shoes, clothes everything. He said he was tidying my mess and not to over think. I then seen 2 bottles of wine, a bottle of Prosecco (which he doesn’t drink) and several beers in his bin. It’s making me question is he cheating? I never mentioned the drinks I did ask again if he slept well or if he had been up late and he was adamant he went straight to sleep.

Has he been taking the viagra for someone else? Hiding my belongings when someone else is coming over to stay up drinking with him all night??

I will add he has previous for EA/possible kiss/seeking validation which I discovered by snooping a few months back and he promised he would never hurt me this way again. I’m so confused

Oh my goodness. I hope you’re ok, what a shock. Take whatever means necessary to feel safe- changing locks, door chain. And please press charges and don’t hide that this happened. Share it with friends. I hope it gets back to his friends and everyone sees him for how he really is.

Please stay strong! Sending supportive hugs and resolve dear lady. You are worth so much more than this.

How are you today OP? Hoping you’re okay and safe. Thinking of you 💐

THIS.

I am so sorry OP and hope you recover soon. Well done for calling the police. He has shown his true colours you deserve better. Wishing you all the best.

I hope you have some support IRL, MNs all here to offer support and thinking of you.

I stay there a few nights a week and do all the household stuff and maintain his gardens etc as well as my own home and work full time

Yet he hides your stuff.

Honestly, get rid. He sees you as the domestic, with sex thrown in. Creep.

Just read through this thread and OP’s updates & the last one broke my heart to read :(

unfortunately it is all too common an outcome when someone loses control over someone they have controlled for so long 💔

sending so much love & strength OP, and you will be stronger for this experience 💕

Let us know you’re safe and sound @Lostandconfus3d and that the police are taking this seriously.

Well he's an absolute gem 😡

I really hope you're ok OP and that he's changed.

So proud of how you have found the strength to make this positive change for yourself, It might feel like two steps forward one step back but keep going, every single step takes you further away from him and closer to the amazing life that's intended for you xx

You poor thing. I hope you are okay. Whatever you do, press charges.

You can have a bright and happy future without him making you his unofficial PA, house skivvy, baby sitter and gardener.

I am sorry about the premature menopause. It's awfully bad luck. You could go ahead with a donor egg perhaps. Not with this awful creep obviously.

Maybe you can contact some of your old friends now that you have finally broken away from this monstrous man. And make new ones. Golf sounds like a great interest to take up. It's a good way to meet people.

Oh OP! I'm so sorry. I just read your posts and smiled that you'd done such a huge thing for yourself and found yourself again and had so much to look forward to and then your last post was horrifying.

All the above is still true. This also shows the person he is. Please get the authorities involved. Thinking of you

So sorry to hear what’s happened to you. This is the worst of life right now but if you can fully extract yourself from this piece of shit, you have a very bright future ahead with happiness to come. Dig in OP, you can do this.

I am so sorry to read this OP.

Hope you're ok, he's really shown who he is now.

Xx

Find someone your own age.

I'm sorry but I'd say 100%

Try reading all the updates before being a self righteous dick.

Join some clubs or go to the gym or something you will make new friends

I have started going to water aerobics and the gym four times a week and have made lots of new friends. X
Please leave him and block him, he's making a fool of you and you are still young enough to meet someone nice. X

Read the updates. Thread has moved on a lot since the first post

He did what???? Oh, the pathetic piece of shit 🤬🤬 Hope you are ok op and that this rancid piece of human excrement never darkens your door again.

Morning,

im ok got checked over at the hospital. I am so sore but will survive.

The police came back last night, he’s been charged with domestic assault and part of his bail conditions are he’s not allowed to contact me. He has court in a few weeks and they are looking to place a non harassment order on him so the no contact will continue.

thanks for all ur kind words ❤️

@IDoLikeToBeByTheSea sorry I missed some of the thread but it's very long.
Bless poor @Lostandconfus3d x

I'm so relieved to read your latest update, @Lostandconfus3d. Glad you are surviving his attack OK and congratulations on continuing to make a complaint against him (if that's the expression) so that he can't contact you for the moment. Goodness, how things have changed since you were worried he was cheating on you, your eyes have been well and truly opened and you are doing a fantastic job at putting yourself first now you have realized how he had been using and controlling you until you decided to put a stop to it.

I hope you're OK. Did you let him in? So he knew where you lived even though he's never visited? I'm glad he was arrested.

@alrightluv - The OP said this earlier on: "Even if we were going out and I had to run to mines get ready, he would sit outside in the car for as long as I took"