24 hours of tinder… give up or keep going?

[Tinderella24]

First time on tinder and just wondering if what I’m seeing is normal after 24 hours on there. I must have gone through over 300 profiles… and I would say 1/3 of them are just not men I could/would fancy. Another 1/3 are men with missing/no teeth, sticking their middle fingers up at the camera (does that really attract some women🤷‍♀️) writing things in their bios like “no psychos”, “no drama” which I take to mean “if you ever disagree with me then you’re causing drama or you’re a psycho” some bios have actually got angry rants about women. Would they really go up to a woman in a bar in real life, stick 2 fingers up at her then rant about how women are this & that?

Then …out of the last 1/3, theres the men who are clearly gym obsessed with biceps bigger than their heads (not for me), the sporty ones where they are cycling, wind surfing and climbing mountains but you can’t actually see their face, some good looking ones but who are clearly just after sex or someone “non vanilla”. Then theres the teeny weeny tiny handful that I actually swiped right on …about 8 men I swiped right for, 4 matched but no messages yet and the other 4 are probably inundated with matches, not active or I’m just not their type. Sigh.

Yup 80% of women ( which you are one of) chasing 20 % of men. Tis the reality of online dating unfortunately (for everyone except the 20% of desirable men). If you had met some of those men you dismissed outright IRL you might have given them a chance, found something in common and been willing to overlook a missing tooth or sports obsession.

@Neurodiversitydoctor from hearing other people talking about tinder I always thought it was more men on there than women. Oh well, I think it’s just confirmed maybe online dating isn’t for me. 😞

There might well be more numbers of men on there, but as you noticed many of them are absolutely awful. And that's supposed to be them advertising themselves. It beggars belief.

Your percentage findings are about normal.

And the ones who don't message when you match are those who swipe right on everyone, then only actually look when you match.

If you want a shag and that's it, then great, tinder is brilliant. You can sort it in minutes.

If you want more and don't have a pile of disposable time to sift through the dross, I'd give up.

That's not what I am saying at all, perhaps I didn't word it well. This article explains it better

https://isaiahmccall.substack.com/p/why-80-of-women-only-date-20-of-men

@arethereanyleftatall I think that’s what’s surprised me, the mindset that if they go on, stick two fingers up on their profile pic, rant about how horrible women are, that will somehow get them dates 🤷‍♀️I also don’t understand how people are on all the apps either; it’s so time consuming.

I've been on and off them for a out 3 years.
I switch between tinder, bumble, hinge, pof and even paid for elite singles (never again!) Once.

This morning, I delete the lot. Again.
I may come back to them, but if that is the alternative to singledom....nope.

I had a bit of fun on them for a few years but built up a lovely single life simultaneously. Now I'll occasionally load up an app if there nothing on tv and swipe left on everyone either thinking 'I'd rather be single' (95%) or 'I don't want to catch something' (5%) on each.

@WhyArePiratesCalledPiratessss if you have to choose, which one would you say was the best?

Maybe some of the 80% might be more desirable if they dressed nicely, took nice photos and didn't put their middle finger up at the camera. Seriously, who does that to someone you're trying to attract. It's quite a common thing on the apps.

@arethereanyleftatall haha, those are the exact thoughts I had whilst swiping. 😬

@Almostwelsh exactly. Lots of men looking dishevelled. Double chin whilst lay topless in bed also seems to be a common one 😅

Form an orderly queue ladies...

@arethereanyleftatall 🤣🤣🤣🤣 sign me up!

🤣🤣🤣 no thanks Julian!

I went on tinder on and off for about a year and a half.

sometimes I’d be really excited to see what was out there and went on a few dates.

other times I would despair and think it was pointless and close my account, just to restart the cycle weeks later.

long story short, I am about to Marry my final tinder date and he is the kindest, funniest most handsome man you could meet :)

don’t give up but always keep your standards high and know your worth.

@DaisyChain505 aw that’s lovely, glad you got a happy ending x

I met my partner on Tinder 5 years ago, so I'm biased, but I did meet various people on dating apps for quite a few years first; some fails, some flings, some 6 month things...

I think you should give it more than 24 hours! But keep rejecting the dickheads and try to find the good people.

Dating sites can be ok, sometimes you have to think, you're only after 1 man (or woman of some cases)! Just a lot of wheat and chaff to sort through.
Good maybe if your pretty rubbish at messaging or want to maybe practise dates. But I always don't hold my breath on them

OLD is a misogynistic cess pit. I came off all the apps and I am SO much happier.

I made an album of my favourite gems in case I ever feel like I’m in danger of changing my mind.

this one is a fave…

Most men will swipe right on most women..most women will swipe left on most men. And there is a lot more men than women on there.

It only works for the men on there that mostly all the women want (and then complain they won't settle) or women who are happy with casual dating. Thus women get frustrated with it and men get reduced to inceldom.

@Wigglytuff345 haha. Just seen one profile whos bio just says…. I can wipe my own arse. 🤣 48 hours later of tinder and my expectations have come wayyyyyyyyyy down !

How old are you, OP?

It's definitely worse as you get older. I'm in my 50's & it's grim.

Fine if you want something casual or short term.

I only do OLD in short bursts as it's so fecking awful.

@RoséProsecco late late 30s 😅 Yeah I think I will be one of those who does short bursts too. I think it’s demoralising for those who genuinely want to find just one person and can’t find one connection in a sea of people.

Don’t forget the topless men holding a giant fish.

Ive never met a woman yet who gets turned on at the sight of a massive carp but they seem to love showing those fishes off