24 hours of tinder… give up or keep going?

[Tinderella24]

First time on tinder and just wondering if what I’m seeing is normal after 24 hours on there. I must have gone through over 300 profiles… and I would say 1/3 of them are just not men I could/would fancy. Another 1/3 are men with missing/no teeth, sticking their middle fingers up at the camera (does that really attract some women🤷‍♀️) writing things in their bios like “no psychos”, “no drama” which I take to mean “if you ever disagree with me then you’re causing drama or you’re a psycho” some bios have actually got angry rants about women. Would they really go up to a woman in a bar in real life, stick 2 fingers up at her then rant about how women are this & that?

Then …out of the last 1/3, theres the men who are clearly gym obsessed with biceps bigger than their heads (not for me), the sporty ones where they are cycling, wind surfing and climbing mountains but you can’t actually see their face, some good looking ones but who are clearly just after sex or someone “non vanilla”. Then theres the teeny weeny tiny handful that I actually swiped right on …about 8 men I swiped right for, 4 matched but no messages yet and the other 4 are probably inundated with matches, not active or I’m just not their type. Sigh.

Tinder really is bottom of the barrel when it comes to dating apps IMO. If you really want to try online dating I would suggest Hinge or Bumble. But don’t expect a whole lot better!

Americamp/Camp America
My teenager is off to do a summer as a camp counsellor and I’m wondering if anyone has any useful advise. We’re finding a couple of things quite difficult.
Firstly we wanted to get a phone SIM (eSIM) for her to use as soon as she gets to America. Mint seems the cheapest at 15 dollars a month. We just can’t work out how to pay from the UK though. PayPal doesn’t seem to work as it only lets her put her camp address down.
Health insurance is paid for by American-camp but do we also need ‘normal’ travel insurance. So confused. Anyone done recent summers abroad in States to advise please?

Sorry posted above in wrong place, has asked for it to be moved.

I joined an OLD site (not Tinder), went on one date within the first month and married him.

I also have a friend that found her husband on Tinder so I think it’s not that bad but you do have to wade through it, bit like finding a bargain on Vinted. It’s mostly just rancid castoffs but there’s some hidden gems 😂

I haven't been on Tinder, but your experience matches mine on Hinge exactly, except I'd add another type which are photos designed to very overtly portray wealth. It'll be them in their car, doing a macho pose with their massive watch in the forefront, or them on a boat or yacht in photos that either indicate we are from completely different worlds, or that are very purposefully meant to say 'I have money'.

You've made your post in someone else's thread. You need to start your own one, otherwise you won't have any replies.

Hinge is definitely less dreadful. I know 3 people who have met online partners on there. I'm very passive though, I wait and see which men like me and then filter through them. It's less tiresome that way. I've still not met a long term partner but I've met some nice people. I concluded I'm quite fussy.

Well I had a guy message me on pof at the weekend to tell me, in his opening message, that he thought I had the personality of a fish and that I seemed like hard work. I mean, wtf?! I wouldn't mind but he was a solid 3/10 😂

I also think the dating apps have really gone downhill since covid.

I know lots of people who met on OLD pre-covid but none since.

It's just become a platform for awful behaviour which you wouldn't do in real life.

I'm now going to try singles events instead.

I met DH on Hinge so it can work out sometimes, but I think we have it easier here (an island) as people seemed much better behaved than I've read about elsewhere, probably because there's a decent chance people they actually know will see their profiles, or they'll bump into potential dates in the street. DH and I actually bumped into each other on a night out between matching and arranging a date.

Word gets around among singles here too; treat one date badly and she'll tell her single friends who'll tell their single friends and BOOM your already small dating pool is reduced to a muddy puddle.

I spent 6 years on there, had over 8k matches and over 100 dates but I did meet my husband. It sometimes takes a bit of time

yeah I agree, its taken me so long to feel ready to date again after my ex and I’m just completely deflated now! 😞

I want more than a 2/10, topless, toothless, big fish catching man, flicking me the Vs in their photo, demanding me to be a whore in the bedroom whilst also labelling all woman psychos and full of drama! And if that makes me fussy then so be it 😅

@FoleyHuck I’m moving to where you are! 😅

Agree there are some truly awful men on some of the apps - I have friends who have had shocking experiences, and to look for a guy for one of my best friends who doesn't do Facebook, I joined a Facebook group where women discuss their online dating experiences - oh my God - it would put you off for life.

BUT four years ago I met the love of my life on Tinder. He isn't perfect, but not am I. It hasn't been all plain sailing by any means. But he's the last man in my life certainly (him or single for me!)

So please don't despair of meeting someone on there, although I can see how it might start to feel hopeless.....

I think taking regular breaks is good.

I used to survive about two weeks of tinder before I'd get bored. I went on a few dates, enjoyed meeting people.

Met my DP on Tinder two years ago, he really wasn't my usual type at first sight, or from the background I usually went for. Adore him though.

What singles events are you looking at? I have a company near me who organises singles events (by age group - seems sensible). Mostly a walk and lunch. The organiser charges quite a bit and then additional matchmaking services are charged for a lot more. I looked at some of the social media photos - same 8-12 people. No thanks! I've tried MeetUp - found one great group locally, the rest mean going to London all the time.

It’s nice to hear these stories where you have met people on there. I definitely think men are often better looking in real life as they don’t have the knack of camera angles and what makes a flattering photos like we do 😅 but a bad attitude on a profile just puts me right off and no good camera angle can fix that!

@socialdilemmawhattodo - I'm in Edinburgh & there's pipsocial, Meetup & speed dating.

What it is with the accusing /slightly angry messages as well when you do actually match? An example “hi, good morning, how are you today?”
their reply “you have got a lot of pics with scrubbed out faces??”
I have seen a lot of people blank out the faces of others on their pics and I’m pretty sure my family and friends don’t want their faces all over a dating site.
Am I missing something here? I’m genuinely confused. Also, why would you respond in that way….no hi, hello, how are you, just straight in there with that? 😭

Wait for ones who get arsey if you don’t reply within nano seconds.

The increasingly aggressive ‘are you there’ ‘hellooooooooooo’ ‘another time waster’ succession of messages one after the other because you dare to be out when they send a message.

Because they hate women. They are angry they are even on the app. That’s it.

Case and point

@Wigglytuff345 wow!! They actually do hate women don’t they?? I don’t even understand what he was getting at. I didn’t even bother to reply and just unmatched.

I wonder how successful this strategy is? Seriously how many red flags can he wave and expect women to be interested?

These were all separate men. The whole thing gives incel energy. I am 100% done with dating, not in a bitter way, just that my life is so much more peaceful without it.

it’s disappointing and if I met someone IRL I’d entertain it but I’m not holding out any hope.

I just want to concentrate on my career, and have a nice home and a dog.