Husband has told me he is going to Thailand.

[Ilivetosleep]

My husbands older brother turns 50 this year. He is married and hads a new born baby. This afternoon when I got home from work ,my husband has declared that him, his brother, his nephew and two of their cousins are going to Thailand for his 50th. He hasn't mentioned this to me before and we have 4 kids and custody of my niece. Would you find this odd and worrying??

I worked there connected to the oil and gas industry.

I understand your point but would it be better for non sex tourists to stop going?

Would that remove jobs in the tourist industry and push more people into sex industry?

Very complex issue in a country where many people are born into poverty.

I don’t know the answers and am genuinely asking the question.

The non sex tourist industry matters a lot.
Often the sex tourists stay in cheap accommodation and use their money in a different way.

Non sex tourists are the ones who stay in better hotels, eat in more expensive restaurants and go on the day excursions.

Worth remembering that prostitution and soliciting are actually illegal in Thailand although this is laughably enforced.
Sometimes the women are arrested but never seen the man.

I have seen men arrested for abuse of children but again this was just a token in a sea of abuse.

I have found that Thais, in general, would like to be associated with tourists that come for the culture rather than the rape of its citizens.

I had a friend whose husband was going there regularly for fishing trips. Since they had a dysfunctional, almost sexless relationship, I wondered about the nature of the fishing. Knowing the region well, I have zero doubts about why male-only groups visit the country.

This. Tosser.

DH did go on a men's only trip to Thailand when I was pregnant, and I was ok with it. BUT we discussed it, agreed a compromise around trip length, and I trust him & his friends. There was a specific reason they went, and it wasn't sex tourism (although we did joke that DH looked like a sex tourist as he flew out solo).

Your spidey senses are clearly tingling and the sensible brother not wanting to go says it all. I'd be very worried/angry about this.

the 15x you have holidayed there

alone or with friends or with your partner and family? @C1N1C

Disgusting It's obviously a sex holiday

ah with your family

but really… it’s been a boost to your ego to be approached by prostitutes?

Seriously?

Please lighten up. It was a joke, not a symbol of a rotting relationship.

This is an incredibly stupid question. The non-sex tourism offers legitimate and respectable work opportunities for Thais.

Because if you build tourism that isn't related to sex trafficking you support an alternative for the Thai (and often Burmese) women and children. Instead of leaving them to the predators and say you're doing good thing.

@Dancehalldarling are you going to respond individually to everyone who has suggested this holiday is dodgy

An all male group going to Thailand, with his brother being particularly known for being unfaithful? If they are going to one of the larger cities, then they will almost certainly have easy opportunities to bang some Thai bar girls - who are not shy at all and know exactly what to do to get what they want (i.e. money in exchange for sex).

A worrying aspect is that he could end up on some 'list' for holidaying with a group of men in Thailand which may well affect his working life. Does his work rely on his integrity?

Thai, Burmese, Cambodian and Laotian women and children are trafficked in Thailand. Just to open some eyes to the scale of the problem.

sure

that’s why mumsnetters holiday there

in reality it will be because you get a big holiday for pretty cheap

It appears that apologists for sex predators have discovered the thread.

A related anecdote: when we were living/working in the Middle East a younger colleague of dh would regularly holiday in Thailand - he was quite open about the ‘attractions’. He once told me the only reason he’d ever get married was for sex and for someone to cook and iron his shirts.

Evidently he used often to hook up with the same Thai girl a few times running, and pay her for the whole 10 days or whatever it was.

Until the time he once went back, bumped into her in a bar, was pleased to see her, and had assumed she’d feel the same.

Instead she snapped, ‘You want to talk to me, it’s ten dollars!’

He had the gall to be very upset about it!

😂😂

Yes.

When I was there, a new bar opened on walking street (red light district) to much excitement.

The women that worked there were white and blonde and were said to be from Russia.

As they were white they were more expensive (not my outlook, the general consensus was this made sense).

Run by extremely intimidating white men.

Don’t know if the bar still exists, but they can also be added to the trafficked women in Thailand.

yes a “joke”
which the wife of 25 years got very anxious and suspicious about
and a husband that does a “joke” like this to his wife?

yep… it’s rotting

not just sex but organs as well. I worked in the sector FFS. People who are hiding their eyes behind their hands and wailing 'racism' know fuck all about it. I'd love to be that naive to be frank.

https://hungary.iom.int/stories/forced-crime-trafficking-survivors-thailand-tell-their-stories

eery and any country can be used for sex tourism. unless your husband has form fr using sex workers why would it be likelihood?

Thailand is an excellent holiday destination, gorgeous, great food and people, easy going culture, clean, great infrastructure, lovely beaches.

Excellent partying and weed is legal. one of the biggest holiday destinations in the world.

Of course Mumsnetters don't go there to support women. They go to an absolutely beautiful part of the world with unreal beaches and scenery. That is really cheap.

As a number of people have said though the Thai people want that to be the reason people visit and not sex tourism which fuels trafficking. Particularly from poorer neighbours. The filthy western men would love it if other tourists just left them to it.