Dating Thread 248 - Spring is on it's way and so are outdoor dates

[SortingItOut]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your faulT.
7. Know your wortH.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

Oh no! Sorry to hear that @SamW98. For some reason they seem to think we won't notice the lies

I've finally matched with my first and only iron from Hinge, let's call him Mr King. We've been chatting on the app and WhatsApp and had a coffee date during the week just gone, which was great.

I found him extremely attractive, and he seems to really like me, which is an odd feeling for me as in the last year or so of being with my EXDP, he seemed to despise me. That relationship ended almost 3 years ago, plus we'd stopped having sex a few months beforehand. I've not slept with anyone since my EXDP, and I seem to have a sexual tension with Mr King, though we've not yet kissed!

Going to aim to meet Mr King again when DC have gone to their Dad's in the next week or so.

@HelenHywater I would cancel if I were you. The happier he is the more painful he will fall I think.

Second date with Mr Modern today. Very fun - coffee, museum, dinner. At the end of the meal we had a weird moment where he stared at me silently. Later he admitted I looked quite serious there (truth: I was quite drunk) and he was cracking his head thinking what he had done wrong! 😂 We agreed to meet later in the week. One thing I don't like is Mr Modern isn't very prompt with texts. But probably should cut him some slacks. Here is a guy who likes vinyls and still read physical newspapers, what can I expect 🥲

@Dadjoke007 I chatted with a couple of people like that. I think they just want penpals!

This sounds like a lovely date!

Which museum did you go to?

@Starseeking this is so exciting! Love this update.. keep us posted!!

@SamW98 always so disappointing! Why do they do it? I'd love to have an ego that big to get away with being that dishonest.

Just spent half an hour swiping and it is fairly desolate out there. Had one nice match in the week and he sent a message but only replied to him yesterday due to work and parenting being full on. Might sign up to Hinge again tonight as the Tinder pool is very dry

@HelenHywater what is the new look Bumble? I've never got on with that app.

@mumofoneanddone82 if you match with someone, they can now send the first message.(I think it's because they've already commented when they view your profile - so it pops up as a first message).

Oh interesting @HelenHywater as a woman I never understood this 'putting women in control' with Bumble. I'd match with people and end up having to send a message first and never hearing back. So feeling shit to be honest. Haha. It didn't really feel like I was in control

Am on Bumbke tho have never done anything with it but have seen on there done people I know in real life. I don’t think they will have seen me as I always just look on and the snooze my profile. One of the guys (Mr Forearms) is part of a peripheral friendship group who are meeting later today, and he has posted in the group chat that he is going. I haven’t seen him since a party last summer -did fancy him and he appeared to fancy me, but Mr Wozfunnest came and intervened (even tho we had split up by then after he ghosted me for months…)
Sone weeks later he did tell me he had been very jealous of Mr Forearms.
I didn’t want to pursue anything with Mr Forearms because of the friendship group and did not want to upset Me Wozfunnest even though our relationship is over.
However, spurred on by a fantastic audiobook by Richard Wiseman about how ‘lucky’ people seize opportunities that are also available to ‘unlucky’ people who choose not to, am thinking I will go the event this afternoon and if MrForearms is there will at least have a chat with him…🤞

Bumble has an offer on today to see who has liked you for £2.99 for 1 day only. So I paid it and literally all my likes are about 50 plus miles away! What the heck!! No wonder I have no luck on there. Maybe bumble just isn't that popular in my area? Disappointing none the less!

@VanillaSox That book by Richard Wiseman sounds interesting. I might have to check it out. Good luck with Mr Forearms. You're def. right to give it a go, if you don't try, you can never win

@blacksocks33 Had such bad luck with Grumble, I swear it's jinxed or something 😬

@SamW98 Proud of you for being brave and giving it a go! That's all we can do really

I saw Mr. D yesterday and we had fun (as in, we were playful) and it was so refreshing to just be silly. Reckon a lot of people use "fun" as in having sex. Up until I met him I didn't even realise how much time I was in these joyless (very srs) situations. But yea, different people bring out different sides of us I guess. Never would have figured this out if I didn't give a chance to someone different.

@mumofoneanddone82 did you hear back from the most recent guy you were seeing?

@cassiatwenty ahhh amazing!! I totally agree, meeting different types of people and personalities can really help you figure out exactly what you are looking for :)

I really dislike bumble. I've never had any luck with it and I hate the messaging first. The new feature doesn't help either... I don't know why they don't just scrap the messaging first thing or allow people to opt in/out of it!

I seem to have entered a weird place on tinder aswell. The profile all look the same...

I'm starting to wonder if I should just take a week or so off from it as it's getting depressing! And I'm swiping without even thinking....

@Crushed23we went to the National Gallery to see an exhibition (really just two paintings). It is refreshing to see someone who is genuinely interested in museums and theatre, with the cost of living crisis I feel like most guys are going the other way. How is your dating life - any new iron?

His profile says he’s 5’11 I’m 5’7 and he pretty much same height as me.

My ex DJ and son both 6ft so I’m pretty good at gauging when someone’s around that height and he definitely wasn’t.

I’ve sent him the no spark message this morning. He’s a nice enough guy so deserves a polite reply. He’s not for me so it’s better be honest straight away

@blacksocks33 Aw I really feel you. We can deffo get burnt out by these apps and have been swiping mindlessly. I've been there this past December, and OLD broke me lol

You can always take a break for a week, get some rest, sleep and take of care of yourself. Apps will still be there. If it's not fun, stop (thread rules). You can always pick it up when you recharge

Off topic but did anyone listen to new Taylor Swift's song "I Can Do It With a Broken Heart"? It's such a cute song 😊

I think it's fixed like this.....I've definitely matched locally but never had anyone come up under 9 miles away when I've taken up this offer.

Thx!! Availed myself of that bargain😁😁😁

I mean the person who posted the 2.99 bargain 😁

After tedious coffee date with Greta Thunberg's Granny a couple of weeks ago, have arranged meal this Friday with Ms Yorkshire whom I had couple of dates with in 2022.

Not sure if she has long term potential but she is good company.

Also started chatting with someone on Bumble - an app which I had forgotten about.

So, at least for time being, I am feeling positive about dating.

Can I join in here please? I'm back OLD after a bit of a break. I need someone to complain to because no one in the real world gets how soul destroying it is.

I'm not getting many matches on the apps at the moment. I recently went from dark brunette to lighter hair and my new hair do doesn't seem to be as popular as I was with dark hair. I matched and have been chatting with a bloke today who has asked me all of zero questions. I'm feeling very flat about it all.

Hi I agree it can be challenging!
How about OLD Bingo?
I have had -
Man in a sexless marriage just looking for new friends
Man still living with his wife and son but they are separated and both on the apps looking for new relationships so they can solve their housing problem
Matches blowing hot and cold with no logic apparent
I'm sure there's more you can all add!

@wtfnow88 I think we could throw in ‘not quite as young now as my first photo’ into the mix?!