Dating Thread 248 - Spring is on it's way and so are outdoor dates

[SortingItOut]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your faulT.
7. Know your wortH.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

@cassiatwenty good to hear that you had a fun time with Mr D! Doesn't it make a difference when there isn't a whopping great ego in the way?!

This thread has been a wonderful education and confidence boost for me. I feel like the bar is low 😂 😂

@Bestlife18 I'm on tinder bumble and hinge. I seem to naturally drift to tinder though. The profiles are more detailed in bumble but I never ever get a good convo on there, all my dates have come form tinder.
I did join match and paid for a month but I hated it. The messages I was getting was from people on the other side of the country despite me having my filters set! Anyway I deleted my account and subscription a few days later 🙈

Had a small influx of matches today but there's no spark or potential with any of the conversations 😔 I hate sounded so negative as I'm not a negative person! But we all know what thsi experience does to us!

Jeez. Some people.

matched on a profile. Good chat in app, then lots of good chat in WA. Two way stuff, looks a good match. Suggest a drink and she says a lovely idea but not practical as she has her girls most of the time.

so without sounding rude, why are you on a dating site?? I know it could be a way of saying no but seems weird when we both chat in detail!!

@Dadjoke007 I do think there are lots online looking for validation or a self esteem boost. The bottom line is if someone likes you, they will make time. If she isn't offering an alternative type of date, then move on.

Oooh -well-swiped!
I would definitely go for that, because even if he has tidied it specially at least it shows an awareness of what makes a decent photo and what women would like, rather than the usual lazy pics.
I would have to stage a pic like that as my house is a mess 😁😁😁
Agog now to hear what he is like.
(Can you call Mr Tidy do can follow 😂😂😂)

My FWB is a Buddhist. I just told him I didn't know loads about Buddhism and could he tell me about this side of him. There are different schools of Buddhism, with differing values and beliefs, so perhaps you could ask him which one he practices?

Also, if he's into practicing tantra you could be in for some long fun times 😉

Sorry Bewareofthisonetoo But he hasn't matched with me, so we will never know the answer to the bathroom question

Dadjoke007 Ahh, frustrated for you! It's awful isn't it. Happens to me a lot. How did you leave it with her? (Just curious!)

Is it just me or if you have “fun and casual” as what you are looking for it descends into people inviting you to orgies, swingers parties or sub/dom situations? Which by the way are not what I meant by “fun and casual” 😂

On the up side it’s letting me practice saying no thank you.

She just said that to me and then enjoy my weekend. I have not bothered replying.

not fussed, but is seems pointless to chat a lot and then not to meet.

Form an orderly queue ladies 😱

Meeting the guy I’ve been chatting to in a couple of hours but I’ll be honest I’m not feeling it.
I just think he’s too passive - he doesn’t make any suggestions just says tell him a time and a place and he’ll be there. And despite saying several times about meeting today he still messaged this morning asking if it’s today or tomorrow. So definitely the vibe he’s chatting to others and losing track - which is fine but try and not be so obvious that you’re getting confused mate.

But I’ll give him an hour or so of chatting over a drink before I make any decisions.

SamW98 I hope that it goes well. Sounds like it's one of those where you just have to 'Meet & see'.

Could she mean she’s not available in the evenings as looking after girls? And might be around for a daytime meet?

I agree. He was married 30 years so we’re both way out of the loop so definitely an in person meet is the only way to gauge it.

@SamW98
Hope all goes well
Today.

Good luck today @SamW98, you're right to meet and take it from there.

Oh no - another one who looks 10 years older and several inches shorter than his profile.

Why do they do it?

@SamW98 I don’t get it either. But then a couple of men that I’ve spoken to have said that they’ve had the same from women. Just daft tbh.

Ok Im now. Nice guy and we got on well but no attraction.

As soon as they lie about age/height/ use old photos - I’m out!

@SamW98
I'm with you if they admit the age bit before a date I’m ok with it. But the ancient photos/looking nothing like them is such a false advert! I’ve turned up to a couple of dates who definitely weee not 5’8 more like 5’5 and I’m short so a bit of honesty wouldn’t have mattered!😂

Right photos! I’ve had a few guys asking for pics this week! One I have dated and was trying his luck the other seemed nice but I’m fed up. If I wanted to flash I would join only fans!!Any one else have the same harassment??

Hello all. I have a third date with Mr Italian on Tuesday, but I've decided that we just don't have anything in common. The problem is, Tuesday is his birthday! Do I have to go ahead with the date?!

I had a message from someone in the new look Bumble who looked really nice - but I missed the deadline to respond to him!

So I have zero irons currently.

Oh god what a predicament! I think I'd be inclined to go ahead as it's so close, especially with it being his birthday!

@SamW98 ahh sorry your date didn't turn out well. I hate the lying about height!!! Why do they do this?!?!

@HelenHywater I'd probably go if he's nice company (and he's paying) and then wait until the day after to break the news. Otherwise, I'd cancel the date asap.

And hate about the height and photos - most men I've been on a date are shorter and worse (older) looking than their photos! Maybe except one guy who was really tall and young 😆

I now know that Mr Italian is 4 years older than his profile stated. (He's had to come clean because of his birthday - he got a bit confused about which year he was born in!)