Dating Thread 248 - Spring is on it's way and so are outdoor dates

[SortingItOut]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your faulT.
7. Know your wortH.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

@cassiatwenty Omg I reread your lines a few times now 😂 Gotta save it down in case I need to use it in the future!

Fucking grim.

Now, I had to try really hard not to annoy my spell checker on here, to write this just as it's been written to me.

What in the world is this supposed to say?!

'Good moyny you soynd as weyl luoke like egssotice frag fac but it smel Lowy.'

Honestly, I'm never one to criticise spelling & grammar. Doesn't bother me at all, I just look past it, because my own is bed.
But they could at least try to write in something resembling English

It's actually Middle English, it's from Sir Gawain and the Green Knight.

😂😂😂😂

Telemakus Aah, I see

😆

Ok this is probably me being so world weary about OLD but does anyone else cringe when everything is ‘cheeky’

Just had one message me saying thing he misses most about being in a relationship is having a cheeky kiss and cuddle in bed before ‘you know what’ and I’m shuddering 🤣🤣🤣

Just had this message on Bumble - anyone? 🤷‍♀️

Good afternoon Sam, well I guess, pleasure is distraction, contentment is connection xxx

Quite the philosopher

@NervesOfCotton I think you send this back “kghfghh. Ftyhgvjiddty. Dyuhbii 😍”

@Telemakus Your reply to the Old English came up as “sensitive content”😂😂

Think this is me after 18 months of OLD 😜😂

Oh I didn't realise! Nothing dodgy I swear!

I still clicked on it! Lol. Ricky Gervais?! It looked like him anyway

Yeah, it reminded me of something David Brent would have said.

Confession: I’ve got a David Brent quote on my profile!

It’s tongue in cheek though.

Go on which one?

Some days I filter the world entirely through David Brent quotes.

Date 3 with Mr Modern is short but lovely. He will travel soon so we won't see each other for a couple of weeks, but date 4 is on the card. He's not the hurricane that was Mr. Antiques, but I feel at ease with him, which for me rarely happens, so I take it as a good sign.

Around lunchtime I was approached by an older gentleman, let's call him Mr. Suits. Noone has asked for my number for a few years now, so I'm super flattered, but there is a big age gap between us so I don't think it will ever work out (plus, I'm dating Mr Modern anyway). Still, it has been a nice day!

OKigen Nice happy update
It's a weird feeling isn't it, when you've just become used to men 'not looking' at you (or I have, anyway) there was a man in a shop the other day, he kind of glanced past me, as you do, & he instantly looked back & held my gaze for a second, he was nice looking too (& I thought 'How long has it been since that happened?!')

LittleFloatingGhost nothing weird so far today. Just the usual 20 years older, 300 miles away 'hi' ones. (Yawn)

I've had several matches expire on Bumble but the changes to the site have made no difference to me.

@Okigen Feeling at ease is so important - and it’s amazing when you feel it instantly too.

I find when I have ridiculous chemistry with someone it’s never a good sign. Once was with someone totally unsuitable but the physical stuff was awesome, the other one just wanted to be a friend. So I don’t use that as a basis (anymore!) for potential, but how comfortable, safe and seen someone makes me feel. That comes with consistent communication, affection (not sexual) and never having to ask, let alone think, “what are we doing?”.

I agree with @LittleFloatingGhost - ridiculous chemistry is not a good sign! With my last relationship, I met two men at the same time, and decided to go with the one I didn't hugely fancy to start with. Right decision (until he dumped me that is).

It's all gone a bit tits up with Mr Italian. I told him (by text, on his birthday!) that I didn't think we had enough in common. But he has responded to say he won't go easily and won't take no for an answer! He keeps ringing me, and when I told him that I was out on Thursday night, he sent a message saying that he supposed it was alright that I was out with somone else.... I think he was joking, but it has really spooked me! He's decided that I am the one for him. And we've only had 2 dates.

@HelenHywater block Mr Italian on everything!

@HelenHywater

He needs to take no for an answer otherwise that’s harassment.
Personally I’d block him.

Hi everyone this isn’t really dating but related I guess. I’m not sure whether I am trying to find a red flag where one doesn’t exist or if I’m justified. So guy I’m seeing, he has now met my kids as it was a necessity to be able to see each other. I’m a forward planner. I mentioned about what he thought to us all meeting (his kid too) vaguely, not with any specifics. His reaction was a bit odd and like I’d caught him totally off guard. Can’t put my finger on it but it made me uneasy. For context, he doesn’t have him in the week as he lives a fair trek away. Just made me wobble a bit over whether I need to rein in my investment at this point or am I just being stressy for no reason??

I think when it comes to children everyone walks at different paces. I don't think it would be any reflection on you whatsoever if he didn't want to bring his children into the situation just yet, it's probably just more that he isn't ready to mix the two. I wouldn't consider that a red flag!
But if you're unsure or it's made you feel a certain way then why don't you ask him? See what page he is in with it all?

I've not done any swiping all week, had no matches come through 🙈 Going to get back in the horse this weekend. Can't wait to say "hi, yeah I'm good thanks" over and over again 😬

@Bestlife18

Its hard to gauge without more information but personally it would be a long time into the relationship before I thought about anyone meeting children and blending families would be even further down the line.

So him not wanting you to all get together isn’t a negative, it’s the pace he wants to go at and what’s right for his children.