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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

i think im pregnant and its not dp's baby :(

166 replies

imintrouble · 31/03/2008 17:05

yep i know im a terrible person but without sounding like im making excuses i was very drunk and he gave me cocaine (never took the stuff before in my life and never will again) and cannibis. it happened 3 times in one night he didnt use anything and didnt pull out. i love my dp and this would break us as well as break his heart. feel free to shout at me i deserve it. but ive had a lot of discharge, tender breasts and headaches. same as my other 3 pregnancys.

OP posts:
JamesAndTheGiantBanana · 01/04/2008 11:49

It's best to know, for peace of mind if nothing else, there's nothing worse than your mind racing and coming up with a million different horrible scenarios! Best of luck, here if you need me. x

littlewoman · 01/04/2008 11:50

We've all done stupid things, doesn't mean we deserve bad things on top of it all ... hoping for the best outcome for you

Youcannotbeserious · 01/04/2008 11:59

Agree totally with Littlewoman. I'm hoping for the best for you too.

slim22 · 01/04/2008 12:08

sending hugs.
Get tested. get treatment if necessary. Talk to counsellor about termination. This is your mess, your decision.
I personally would never dream of burdening DP/DH with the decision in a situation like this. That would be adding insult to injury.
Of course, never been there so can only guess what I would be inclined to do. That's me. You might think differently. Hope you find the courage to face up to it.

Then you need to sit down and think hard about your relationship with DP. Can you live with it? Carry on? reassess?
Only you and him can tell.

Take good care of yourself. That starts with getting the medical bit sorted ASAP.

3NAB · 01/04/2008 12:58

Are you late yet? If so, do the test.

If it has happened within the last 72 hours you can still take the morning after pill and if it is within 5 days I think you can have the coil fitted.

I hope this works out for the best for you.

lennygrrr · 01/04/2008 13:09

If you are not late yet, get the MAP, if you are TAKE A TEST. Go to see your GP, they will not judge you. Book a dr appointment now, as you will need to go either way. Go to the supermarket, buy a test, and do it. There is no point prevaricating.

Everybody fucks up sometimes. EVERYBODY.

So:

  1. Phone your GP now. Get appointment.
  2. Go and buy test
  3. TAKE IT
  4. See GP and discuss your options
nappyaddict · 01/04/2008 13:44

imintrouble - are you sure what you took was what you thought you took? could it be possible that you were given different drugs without you knowing?

JamesAndTheGiantBanana · 01/04/2008 21:16

Any news iit? did you manage to take a test yet?

Beetroot · 02/04/2008 10:37

imo

if you are pregnant
i would not tell your dp. You deal with the guilt and get on with it on your own. It is not fair to include him

vixnpips · 02/04/2008 11:41

Take test go to clinic or gp and get tested for STDs.
And take it from there, if you have caught something other than a baby .. ur DP will need to know!

Original poster
imintrouble · 02/04/2008 17:30

bfp

OP posts:
BaggyBick · 02/04/2008 17:33

what does bfp stand for? sorry if it's an obvious one.

kittywise · 02/04/2008 17:34

big fat positive

MissyTheFlouncer · 02/04/2008 17:36

kitty are you imintrouble?

MissyTheFlouncer · 02/04/2008 17:37

no sorry i didnt read properly lol

kittywise · 02/04/2008 17:38

oh no, I'm not ( sorry to confuse) just answering the Q!

Beetroot · 02/04/2008 17:42

go to clinic
get checked
terminate (if that is what you want)
don't tell dh

imo

BaggyBick · 02/04/2008 17:47

sorry- that was my fault for not specifying.
Kitty-thanks for explaining,
imintrouble- are you ok? spoken to anyone yet?
[hugs]

VeniVidiVickiQV · 02/04/2008 17:48

Agree with beetroot actually.

BaggyBick · 02/04/2008 17:50

i would speak to my DH, but that's only cos he can read me like a book.
Do whatever you feel you can live with. it could be his baby, do you want to take that risk?
hope it all works out. xx

beautifuldays · 02/04/2008 17:51

oh dear...

is there any chance the baby could be your dp's?

if the baby was your dp's would you want to keep it? as in would it change how you feel about being pregnant? you need to work out what you want with regard to this baby first, and make sure you are making the right decision and will have no regrets later.

MissyTheFlouncer · 02/04/2008 17:52

i agree with beetroot too
as awful as it sounds i couldnt lose my family. im shocked that i think that.

PuppyDogTails · 02/04/2008 17:53

What Beetroot said.

Original poster
imintrouble · 02/04/2008 18:05

im ok. already knew really. if it was dps i would keep it but the fact that i dont think it is i dont think i can. i wouldnt be able to live with not knowing for sure. i dont think ill tell dp just need to workout what way to go about it. thanks everyone x

OP posts:
Drusilla · 02/04/2008 18:08

What Beetroot said. Good luck.

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