My DB and DH don't really get on due to lots of different factors but my DB has asked if him and his 2 children can stay in our house for a week whilst we are on holiday. DH hates my brother and know he won't be happy but I have said yes to DB as he is going through an extremely messy divorce and his ex wife has treated him like . She was the main learner and she left him and he is really struggling financially. When they were married due to her job they were very well off and enjoyed a lovely lifestyle and my DB wants to be able to take his kids on holiday this year but has no money to do this but staying in our house and enjoying the amenities in a different area will be lovely for his kids.
I know my DH will not be happy but it is my house too and I have no problem. So who has the final say?? Surely he is my brother and it is my house too but my DH will argue he doesn't want him in the house.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
DB wants to stay in our house whilst away DH will say no
sewknit56 · 14/04/2024 13:50
LeoTheLeopard · 14/04/2024 14:02
Of course there is a cohort who are deeply resentful of someone touching the doorbell never mind crossing the threshold.
sadly those posters cannot accept their (delight at ) putting a wedge between siblings, and demand that their spouse be hurt whilst they themselves would never be prepared to be treated in the same way, nor actually say it themselves.
To use my SIL phrase your husband “is just not a very nice person”. He cares not for your feelings or any upset he will cause. He will relish putting your brother “in his place” to feed his own ego.
LeoTheLeopard · 14/04/2024 14:08
OP, does your husband ever give way?
I have been in your position where my husband magically “hated” anyone that I might want to invite, and came out with the furious/sanctuary performance.
the fact was it was just another way to abuse me and fray every familial tie or friendship that I had. The same dominator mentality as we see on the thread.
Astariel · 14/04/2024 14:07
Why have you discounted the possibility that the OP’s brother is a nightmare and her husband has very good reasons for not wanting him in the house?
LeoTheLeopard · 14/04/2024 14:02
Of course there is a cohort who are deeply resentful of someone touching the doorbell never mind crossing the threshold.
sadly those posters cannot accept their (delight at ) putting a wedge between siblings, and demand that their spouse be hurt whilst they themselves would never be prepared to be treated in the same way, nor actually say it themselves.
To use my SIL phrase your husband “is just not a very nice person”. He cares not for your feelings or any upset he will cause. He will relish putting your brother “in his place” to feed his own ego.
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Astariel · 14/04/2024 14:09
Are you reading a different thread to everyone else?
LeoTheLeopard · 14/04/2024 14:08
OP, does your husband ever give way?
I have been in your position where my husband magically “hated” anyone that I might want to invite, and came out with the furious/sanctuary performance.
the fact was it was just another way to abuse me and fray every familial tie or friendship that I had. The same dominator mentality as we see on the thread.
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.