Would your husband make you wait 90 minutes to leave NYE Gathering because he didn’t want to leave?

[Sallymorton81]

Bit annoyed today, we went for a meal to celebrate New Year’s Eve and then back to his uncles house for a party. I wanted to play it by ear but no because his friend already committed to going we had to show up for the friend. It got to 12.20 and I was so uncomfortable from dinner and exhausted (4th day drinking and socialising in a row)
i gave my husband the heads up I was looking to leave shortly. He kept asking me are you sure you want to go, oh I didn’t really want to leave yet, would you be annoyed if I dropped you home and came back? I told him I was feeling sick and not great. He said can I have one more drink and then got it anyway because I was too embarrased to say NO Infront of people. I really felt he took my kindness for weakness.

It was really awkward for me because you could tell I wanted to go for about 90 minutes I must of looked like I was fed up! It got to the point where 90 minutes later his friend asked him to go for a smoke and he said have I got time for a smoke and I lost my temper infront oc his family and said I’ve been waiting nearly 2 hours to leave. Then we left and had a blazing row on the way home. He said that I didn’t make it clear enough I wanted to leave and I never look serious? And he didn’t want to leave.
Am I in the wrong here?

If he wasn't drinking then surely the op would confirm this. But sadly it does look like he was, I mean no one says at a NYE party after midnight "I'm just gonna have one more glass of squash..."

Because it happens all the time. For her husband to be so casual about saying he was going to smoke some cannabis before driving home and for op to not even mention that as an issue, it is a regular occurrence. To completely ignore all posts asking about alcohol and driving, they were both drinking and for it not to be an issue for the op it is a regular occurrence.

The old “I’m not feeling well” card. 🙄

It’s bizarre.

Op needing an adult there cause she has a poorly tummy thinks she has a surprise marriage to others, whilst thinking that her husband driving while drunk and high isn’t a problem.

i hope it’s made up. But if not they are completely dysfunctional and fucked up whilst convincing themselves it’s a great relationship. which is even more fucked up.

I would have let him take me home and go back or got a taxi myself, I would not expect my husband to leave his family just because I wanted to x

You seem to be ignoring the question of whether he drove after drinking/smoking a joint.

This.

Aren’t you annoyed at him smoking joints???

Yabu and a kill joy insisting he goes home with you and is unable to return. It’s NYE!
Controlling as well.
What your dad chooses to do is irrelevant op.

I'm a bit confused as you say he wanted one more drink - was this an alcoholic drink? And then he was having a joint? So surely he couldn't have driven anyway?

If I'd been feeling unwell all day I'd probably have made sure I had a method to get home if I wanted to leave early. As it was NYE, if I was leaving before midnight I'd probably have said to DH to stay on at the party if he wanted to. If it was after midnight I'd imagine that DH would have just come home with me, but that's because we'd have both been ready for bed by that point!

everyone sounds awful in this story
you didn't need to go if you already felt off, just stay home next time
you could have just gone home and not throw a tantrum
he could have ignored his friend

and you're all twats for DUI, seriously. you talk about it as if this was not the worst part of the story

So, he was pissed and high, right?

I agree with those saying you shouldn't have gone to the party in the first place as you were ill

You're blaming your partner but in fact, if you had had the balls to say 'no I'm staying at home, I'm ill ' none of this would have happened

You haven't answered any questions about him drinking and driving.

Whether you both should have gone home or not it seems like you are both happy for him to drive under the influence of drugs or alcohol , or both.

She won’t respond to anyone about that and only replies to the tiny minority who agree with her.

Its one of those threads where she only wants people to agree with her and ignores everyone else.

It sounds as if drinking and driving. If so I've no sympathy for you because you put other lives at risk.

We have all been in the situation where one of you wants to leave and th me other wants to stay. No one is right or wrong in the odd occasion. If it happens all the time it's a different story.

Op js never going to admit the drink driving/ drug driving

you made your own bed then. It was NYE. Did you think that someone who obviously likes to party would go home "early" on the One Big Party Night Of The Year?

What's wrong with doing your own thing sometimes? If he would have made you feel bad for not going and "making" him stay in - you have way bigger problems than one party, tbh.

If you are going out for NYE you know it’s going to be a late one. You should have stayed at home op.

You have ignored the question about him DRINKING and SMOKING WEED and then driving. Are you for real? Your avoidance of this point suggests this is a normal and regular occurrence. I can't even begin to condemn you both enough.

Were you ill or not? It seems to change from post to post?

She did. She said he went to smoke a joint. He drove home. What she hasnt admitted to is how much alcohol he also drank. But she has absolutely said he drug drives, which she had nonissue with.

She said he went for a smoke - no mention of it being a joint? I might have missed that though.

She then later said joint