Dating Thread 244

[SamW98]

The Rules:

1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. Know your worth.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

Happy new year everyone. Haven't posted for a while. Am still dating DP from OLD 😊 Going to read through everything to catch up.

What happened to the two people on here who thought they might be dating the same person? Was there an update?

🤯 Two people dating the same person???

Yes, apparently there were a lot of similarities, can't remember what though, it all got a bit unpleasant I think.

Spoke with Mr Beer, the issues that I foresaw cannot be overcome and we are no longer dating. Feel really sad as there seemed so much potential and I had for the first time started to develop feelings for him. I am paused on all apps and taking a break - will no doubt be reading your updates and be back once I am ready :)

Hey - a lurker to previous threads, as I was preparing myself to the world of OLD. I'm 40+ and coming out of a LTR so my first time ever in dating apps. I finally took a plunge and joined Tinder & then Hinge a week ago. Tinder was useless, not sure of Hinge but at least some activity. How long do you normally chat with a guy before meeting f2f? Been chatting to someone (local to me) a week now and hinting about dates but nothing's happened.

@LittleFloatingGhost

Sorrt to hear your update but when it’s not right then it’s the best thing to go your separate ways. Definitely taking a bit of time out is the best thing to do.

Im off the apps as well but for different reasons. I feel like I’ve actually run out of any men within a 50 mile radius and still can’t get a date so given up trying.

Aw @LittleFloatingGhost. I'm sorry to hear your update and I hope you are doing OK. As @SamW98 said take some time and be good to yourself.

@GoingToBeLessRubbishAtLife yes, it seemed weird that they were dating the same person but I felt like there were fantasists at play there. Both posters never posted after that.

Do you mean you didn't think they were telling the truth? It certainly seemed strange. What are the chances?!

@upanddowns I just think no one knows each other well enough and this story I think was one poster being really happy then it comes out that another is seeing the same man. It didn't ring true but I could be wrong. I'd have expected one or the other to remain on the thread but both disappeared.

I genuinely believe there are fantasists here who make up lives

I thought one of them did come back to the thread?

I don't know, life's strange. Maybe it was the same guy. I'm pretty sure one of them came back on the thread and said she was ok.

Aww LittleFloatingGhost Really sorry to hear this. I hope you are able to do something nice for yourself this weekend. Sending hugs.

User990 Depends on circumstances & the level of chat (for me)

Some men can chat on & off for a few days but they are short messages & I feel like I still don't really know them, others can send longer messages & just add more content, so I feel like I've actually got a sense of the person, so those ones, if we are both able, then I like a meet in the first week or the 2nd, I follow the saying 'Its not real until it's real' & try to get the first meet in ASAP really.

LittleFloatingGhost

onwards
I think it’s really healthy you did the right thing an exited this , for the right reasons

but it’s also really sad xx

@NervesOfCotton yeah I'd also like to see sooner than later, just to see if there is any chemistry. I've been on bumble BFF and did the same there, with some people you just click easier.

@User990 whats Bumble like?

I prefer meeting up quickly as like most of us I’ve wasted time messaging people and it not going anywhere or eventually meeting and thinking ‘oh’

Id rather meet within a week or two - any longer than that and I start losing interest

Bumble was more successful app for me. Think because woman has to message first you don’t get unsolicited sleazy messages that you do on other sites.

@HappyasLarrynot to me it seems more active than tinder, but maybe less people (although maybe tinder has lot of inactive profiles?). You add 3 prompts, so you add less information of yourself (or let's say don't need to add so much). And maybe it's where I am but seems more younger (20s early 30s) or older (50+) men.

Sorry I realised I'm not talking about Bumble 🙈

I've only been on the friends version of Bumble. But interesting to hear about the dating side!

Ah ok - thank you anyway! I made a start but then it said photos and I hate any photo of me so finding 2 decent ones is pretty much impossible 😂

HappyasLarrynot You don't have to put all the photos on that they ask for, on Bumble. Mine keeps telling me that my profile is only 80% complete, because I havn't put all the photos on that they want (I've got 4 on there)

There's a lot of men nearby for me, but loads don't respond to the Matches.

The part that I find the same as any other site, is that there a load who just want endless chat with no intention of meeting.

Ok so I had a couple of glasses of wine and uploaded a couple of photos to Bumble. Hilarious … but would you really put your name as Simonfourfingers?????