Partner just put pets in danger

[TheFoundation]

How would you feel? We have a child-gate to separate our cat and dog. The dog is a terrier, and chases cats. We had a pet each when we met, and have used this solution for a long time with no issues. The cat is 21, and so, stays in mostly, but is taken for tours around the garden when the sun's out, and the dog is contained. We are all 4 usually very happy.

I just came back from walking the dog, fully expecting that the cat would be safely enclosed. My partner was expecting me at around that time. The dog went hurtling in through the door, as always... and the cat is wandering about, loose, in the hallway. I had to do a goalkeeper-like dive to stop the terrier getting at the cat, which would have been a very dangerous situation, given the fragility of the 21 year old cat. My partner said 'Oh, I left the gate open, I didn't realise the cat had even walked out', and did apologise, but...

I'm upset. The risk was enormous. My partner was so careless. An apology makes no difference, when my concern is the lack of awareness of risk.

The animals are safe @StarlightLime . They have a gate between them ,like next door's cat and our dog. We moved in together because we love each other.

What boundaries do you think need to be introduced between dogs and cats? A great big wall?

What a bizarre response.

Thank you for your opinion, @StarlightLime

What would have been a better response? It seems I've missed your point? Unless you just came to criticise? Not sure what you were after. The answer to your question was that we put a physical barrier between two animals to ensure they didn't harm each other, and that we moved the dog into the house because we wanted to live together without giving up our pets.

It seems you just want to have a go?

I can't believe there is still fighting going on within this thread.

I know, there's been calm in the household since about 3 hours after it happened, 2 days ago! MN is brilliantly entertaining, though. People will fight to convince people that there's still a fight :)

And yet, you yourself OP, resurrected the thread that hadn't been commented on for almost 10 hours....

You don't have to keep replying. But you do, and then complaining that others are carrying it on.

I'm not complaining about other's comments, @tuscanpoppy Just those trying to tell me what to do, long after the problem has been solved.

Commenting on my own thread from 10 hours ago isn't resurrecting it. I suppose that when somebody tells you to shut up, you just do? If that's the case... shut up.

The thread was very obviously dying off because people had got bored of your rudeness. You reignited it. Your behaviour really is bizarre and immature. Talk about wanting to get the last word in!

Once again, @tuscanpoppy ; thank you for your critique. Much valued. Do you have a problem with me having the last word on my own thread? I'd really have to question why that might be. Have it if you like, the floor's yours:

Just your silly attitude.

Thanks, @tuscanpoppy , you're really wise. I value your opinion. Any thing else? As a last word? Or are you done critiquing me now, on my own thread?

Your partner made a mistake, it was bound to happen at some stage. No harm has been done so try to get past it.

Thanks, we did, 2 days ago. Long past it. It's just people who haven't read the full thread who haven't.

*who aren't past it, sorry.

Are you interested in bison, by any chance?

Well I am still here because I didn't bother reading the full thread, what's your excuse?

This thread is bonkers 🤣

No system is infallible if it relies on human beings as human beings make mistakes.

I read this same thread last week or week before. Only in that thread the op wanted her dp to get rid of the elderly cat in favour of her dog and she'd only fairly recently acquired the dog not got it 10+years ago. All other details were exactly the same elderly cat, aggressive terrior, baby gates and some weird opening and shutting of them routine...

Well said @Ilovelurchers
Perhaps the OPs partner will see the thread and find something of value in the responses.

@Ilovelurchers

I was angry with my partner, for breaking an agreement we'd previously discussed, and risking the safety of the animals. We talked about it calmly, understood each other's point of view, and resolved the issue. We have both been fine for 3 days.

A lot of people have projected a lot of stuff onto this, including yourself, and responded according to their triggers. That's their prerogative, but nothing to do with me, my partner, or our relationship.

@5128gap My partner has read the thread, and openly laughed. She understood why I was angry, and was comfortable with the way I expressed it.

Love the way people think that I need to 'learn a lesson' because I got angry. Anger isn't a sin. Poor anger management in relationships isn't OK. Perhaps learning the difference might help all those who are seeing me as a terrible partner? So, you could have a look at yourselves, perhaps, rather than judging a happy relationship as some kind of tragedy because a) a person felt angry and b) you've had a hard time in the past yourself?

@allyjay

That's interesting, have you got a link to that thread? I posted as soon as it happened, here, and definitely only this thread, so that was someone else for sure.

Op: am I being unreasonable?

Everyone; yes you are!

Op: NO IM NOT!

What was the point of posting 🤣

@Hellzbellz25

Actually I calmed down a lot right at the start of the thread, so you're wrong there. The point of posting was because I wanted to see what other people would feel in the same situation, as I said in my OP, which you've clearly missed. The thread has been very useful to me, although there do seem to be some people here who have no idea what they're talking about and continue to judge, based on very little info. It's actually also useful to me, as a reminder of what crap people sometimes post!

I'm sorry that you don't think there was much point in me posting, but that's your gubbins. You don't really need to see it as useful, given that you didn't post it, do you?