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Original poster

How often do you have sex?

254 replies

Lilclover · 28/10/2023 22:41

So we were on a night out recently and one of the girls asked how often everyone’s been having sex with their husbands/partners as her and DH are going through a dry spell. I said DH (41) and I (27) have sex at least once a day bar the first 2/3 days of my period and usually we can go 2/3 times a day on the weekends

everyone was really shocked and said that was an insane amount. They were once a week max most of them. We’ve been married 2 years, together 5 and have a 5 month old baby. We used to be at it anywhere between 1-4 times a day before I was pregnant and even during the pregnancy we had sex right up until 4 hours before my waters broke.

genuinely just curious to know how often couples are having sex as i think I think it’s more than it actually is?

OP posts:
GardeningForever · 29/10/2023 17:07

Do you work OP? Either now or before the baby? Only it sounds like you both have a lot of time on your hands!
Tbh I suspect this is bordering on sexual addiction. Not a problem if you are both on the same page. However as you have an older partner he will undoubtedly slow down and could have performance issues just as you hit your prime. I hope you are prepared for this and that your relationship has more depth to it than just sex. Otherwise looks like you'll be in for a frustrating future.

Zanatdy · 29/10/2023 17:16

Well I think great for you, genuinely. When you find someone you fancy the pants off you do want to have sex all the time. Great children hasn’t changed that for you.

Hibiscrubbed · 29/10/2023 17:18

Lilclover · 29/10/2023 11:05

@Mummyme87 personally I find sex 3-4 times in a pregnancy mad. I’m not saying I don’t believe you or anything just when I was pregnant it actually got worse for a while. I remember being about 30 weeks pregnant and DH and I were at a football game and came home that night and honestly think we had sex 3 times that night alone. I was just horny as sin for him.

I’m not saying it’s good/bad, right/wrong etc just my own experience. It’s mad how everyone differs so much and works so differently.

How the fuck is this total bullshit still standing? 😂

Horny as sin?! 😂😂😂

bestunsaid · 29/10/2023 17:25

Absolutely horrible for discussing this with "the girls"( imagine the other way about -yuck!) and also say "girls " in the first place ffs.
Are you all 14 years old?

Original poster
Lilclover · 29/10/2023 17:29

Tryingtokeepcalmandcarryon · 29/10/2023 17:00

Just being really nosy OP, you said that you fancy the pants off him, just wondered if your husband is very classically good looking, the kind of guy that turns heads when he walks into a room or is the attraction and amount of sex more down to you having really great chemistry? Also, what are your tips to keeping that spark, and staying awake in bed in the evening for it! I guess you prioritise going to bed early?

Bit of both tbh. He’s exceptionally fit, massive arms, chest etc, has that rough around the edges look but that’s also what I’m very into anyway so I’m biased. The chemistry is off the scale, honestly we were just saying the other day how our first date felt like we knew each other forever and it was as if the universe said ‘ah finally’. I know that sounds cringey but honestly that’s just how we feel

yes we go to bed early. I’m off on Mat leave so I clean the house during the day so there’s nothing to do in the evening apart from dinner and we go to bed when the baby does.

I know it won’t be like this forever so just enjoying it whilst we can

OP posts:
Original poster
Lilclover · 29/10/2023 17:36

@bestunsaid i see you’re having a lovely evening. One of the girls, yes that’s their gender last time I checked, is 29 and going through a few issues with her DH. We are all very close and she was looking advice. In hindsight I wish I hadn’t have been the one to answer her first.

OP posts:
Original poster
Lilclover · 29/10/2023 17:44

@Tryingtokeepcalmandcarryon should also add just in reference to keeping the spark alive. I still dress up in lingerie now and again to surprise DH. Will do my hair, make up, tan etc. I’m nearly back down to pre pregnancy weight so as my own confidence is going up so is my desire to feel sexy.

i think different types of sex keep it alive too. Sometimes it’s just need you now sex, sometimes it’s real love making etc etc. thankfully it comes pretty naturally. Hope that helps x

OP posts:
GardeningForever · 29/10/2023 17:44

Yawn. Superficial nonsense. Your life, if real, sounds very one-dimensional.
Sex is only one element that makes a relationship great. Your poor friend needed some constructive advice not made to feel worse.

Original poster
Lilclover · 29/10/2023 17:47

@GardeningForever you don’t have to read it you know. Our life isn’t just sex reliant, it’s a big part surely but we’ve more than just that going on obviously. We didn’t marry for sexual compatibility lol.

OP posts:
ohme · 29/10/2023 17:56

He’s exceptionally fit, massive arms, chest etc, has that rough around the edges look

Of course he is. He was never gonna be average looking, was he?

Aramist · 29/10/2023 17:59

This thread is hilarious.

You thinking only 3-4 times in a pregnancy is 'mad' because of your own experience.
Just because it's not your own experience, doesn't make it 'mad'. If anything, your situation isn't very normal.

GardeningForever · 29/10/2023 18:00

And yet OP all you have spoken about with regards to your partner is his looks and the sexual chemistry. So you can understand that people may jump to the conclusion that your relationship is rather shallow. If you say it has more depth then that's great but you posted a rather superficial braggy post, so I'm just responding to it. But you're right I will find something more interesting to read.

Original poster
Lilclover · 29/10/2023 18:03

@GardeningForever i said in a reply to another poster about the chemistry on our first date and feeling like we’d known each other for every. Apologies if that read wrong, I didn’t mean that from a sexual point of view

OP posts:
bestunsaid · 29/10/2023 18:03

@Lilclover so if she is 29 she isn't a girl then isn't she , she is a woman ? And it's sex not gender by the way, male or female is your sex . Gender is an identity. You all sound about 13 years old. Grim as .

Original poster
Lilclover · 29/10/2023 18:04

Aramist · 29/10/2023 17:59

This thread is hilarious.

You thinking only 3-4 times in a pregnancy is 'mad' because of your own experience.
Just because it's not your own experience, doesn't make it 'mad'. If anything, your situation isn't very normal.

I said in that reply that either way isn’t right or wrong. I said personally I found it mad but that was going of my own experience.

OP posts:
Original poster
Lilclover · 29/10/2023 18:04

bestunsaid · 29/10/2023 18:03

@Lilclover so if she is 29 she isn't a girl then isn't she , she is a woman ? And it's sex not gender by the way, male or female is your sex . Gender is an identity. You all sound about 13 years old. Grim as .

Jesus you’re cranky. Would be easier to write you’re not getting any.

OP posts:
bestunsaid · 29/10/2023 18:15

@Lilclover and you sound rather shallow and dumb. You and your relationship.

Lilclover · 29/10/2023 18:19

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Moro93 · 29/10/2023 18:24

Together 10 years and usually 2-3 times per week as a minimum, sometimes it can be a couple of times in one day.
We take around 5-7 days off for my period as it’s really heavy.
I think in an ideal world the both of us would like it to be happening daily but we wouldn’t get the chance.
Before kids it would be at least once daily, sometimes 7 times in a day!

GardeningForever · 29/10/2023 18:25

@Lilclover Don't let us hold you up from your great sex, housework and baby! I'm surprised you've got time for mumsnet, haven't you got some sexy new lingerie you need to be slipping into right now like all good mothers of a 5 month old baby do? 😉

ginnyginnygin · 29/10/2023 18:27

I thought there was a specific board for sex chat.

bestunsaid · 29/10/2023 18:27

yet you are on here prattelling on about the physical side of it and negating whether a person you don't know (me) has had sex recently or not? You are very classy. I call bullshit. It's 🙄still Halfterm in some places isn't it ? Strange you have time for mumsnet with all that shagging going on....

explainthistomeplease · 29/10/2023 18:28

Lilclover · 29/10/2023 10:59

@Newnamehiwhodis i don’t feel obligated to have sex with him everyday, I want to. I orgasm every time or at least 95% of the time. Also seen someone saying about quality over quantity, just because we’re having it more frequently doesn’t mean it’s shit sex. There’s yesterday for example we had sex in the afternoon and by the time it came to the rugby last night we couldn’t keep our hands off each other dying for each other. We just fancy the life out of each other. For anyone who doesn’t believe me etc, I really hope you find something like this in your life or something that makes you as happy

Oooo now that's quite a low blow. For balance let me say that lots of women have lots of other things that fulfil them and make them happy - great careers, participation and success in sports, creativity. Sex may come quite low down on their list of what makes them happy. Orgasm or no orgasm.
Maybe sex is the only thing that fulfils you, @Lilclover (lord knows you must have little time for anything g else), but many women have perfectly rich and fulfilled lives that don't depend on sex dominating their free time

bestunsaid · 29/10/2023 18:29

@GardeningForever exactly !😂

bestunsaid · 29/10/2023 18:30

@Lilclover there's alot to be said for reading a good book lass!😂

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