What one weird thing has killed a relationship stone dead in an instant for you?

[talkingmongoose]

Just something that told you there was nooooo future?

I was seeing a chap quite some years ago, pre DH. We had been dating about a year, and were getting into bed at his place when I mentioned that I had my period, just in a casual 'so no rumpy-pumpy tonight' kind of way. The issue had never come up before.

He went all pale with disgust, said 'I wish you hadn't told me that', and proceeded to sleep on the floor.

Utter, utter twunt, I never returned his calls after that. Lucky escape.

"in order to watch Terminator 2 as it was on the tv for the first time

Gaps - that just brought back memories of a guy I was seeing when I was still VERY young and naive.

His bedroom was plastered in Terminator/Arnold Schwarzenegger posters but the piece de resistance was when I discovered a poster of Arnie's bottom incased in tight red underpants - stuck on the bedroom ceiling!!!

Bibi NO WAY!!!!

to some it all up we should have gone and married all the guys with teenie weenies, and we'd all be rich housewifes shagging the gardener

That sounds like a great life - I'm kicking myself now

Gemma

suddenly imagining the video that gooes with the song "Stacey's mum has got it going on" anyone seen it
not that i am into teenage boys
it was the gardner part honest
but would like to be like the young man's dream when he imagines the mum in slinky undies writhing on the breakfast bar

He thought asking me if I wanted a sperm delivery would turn me on.
Um no.

Pebble dashed my toilet after spending the night...yuck how can you not know you have done that, sprayed is the word.

oh lordy my previous incarnation is on this thread...

Ooh you have to tell us which one now

I walked in on the man who I thought could be 'the one', whilst he was having a wank.He had a white towelling sock on the end of his knob (so he didnt have to clean up.)

It wasnt the masterbating that did it, it was the white towelling sock.....I just couldnt marry a man who owned white socks of the towelling variety even if they were only his wanking socks.

Ew - well if I had to choose I'd rather a man used a white towelling wank sock than just jizzing into the air

jules

A white towelling sock. Dirty bastard!

leather latex or pvc fetish yes, but towelling?????
unless he was very clean person!!!!!!!

This thread is so funny.

My one wasn't really a relationship, it was a total non-starter and shouldn't have happened in the first place.

My H left 18 months ago and eventually I had a few dates with a couple of guys, nothing further, no sex.

Then one night, last summer, I'd met a friend who had separated from his W a year before my split with H. We've known each other years and I'd always thought him quite dishy but would never have acted on it as we were both married.

Anyway we had far too much to drink, he came back to mine and we end up in bed . Fgs he's my mate but I was in need of a *g, it had been a while.

So he's getting on with it, all the time making faces and going ooh, aah etc. Sounded a bit like that old actor, the one who goes 'well hello' in that smarmy, creepy, way, was in Carry on Films I think. Was he called Leslie something?

It was the funniest thing ever, I wanted to laugh but couldn't, I held it in. We will only ever be friends after that, I haven't seen him since but we talk and text. I don't think I can look him in the face again without remembering that night with a smirk.

Said he found towelling socks the best for comfort and absorbency....I feel a bit queasy thinking about it again....ewww

did you move on the pleasures of mutual socking
like they come in pairs, did he offer you the spair one couldn't resist that

"Bibi NO WAY!!!! "

:) unfortunately yes.

What's more worrying is that it was a poster, so not sure what the hell german magazines were doing circa 1992 publishing pics of arnies behind really

Bibi I take it that arse poster was the deal breaker?

Jessica - you are on fire again I see today!

I was trying to think of a 'they come in pairs' quip!

thanks Mousey
thats one turn inside out before washing i will not be doing!!!!
was at a party once and drunken guy asked a friend for a BJ, she told him she didn't like the taste!
he swiftly reached into the fridge and pulled out a strawberry yoghurt, opened it and dipped his knob in it
"that'll taste better" he said as he offered her it again
no relationship or BJ came of his quick thinking!!!!

Bucharest, I started that thread! I just wondered what they were meant to do, whether they should avoid sexual relations or whether there were ops available for them. Although it's funny from our point of view, it's not from theirs, is it? And since I've had a son (who doesn't have that problem, AFAIK) I've thought about them with more pity. Though not enough to shag them!

atswim

'not enough to shag them' - brilliant!

I was going to post on the thread you started but was too scared I'd get set alight. I did feel sorry for him, and for the mother or his DD. I actually wondered if that's why she left at one point

I know it's shallow, but blokes go for women with long legs, big or small boobs, blonde hair etc... as do women. I guess you have no idea whether a parnter has a tiny cock or wizard's sleeve until that moment, ahem, comes?

at yoghurt knob. Eeeewww.

'of' his DD

Was 17. Had dated this older guy for a couple of months and he had been very ''gentlemanly' and romantic (ie no nookie). Then casually telling me in the middle of an ardent tongue-swallowing embrace that he could hardly wait 5 more days when we would be having sex,when he ''got the all-clear from the GUM clinic...''

" Bibi I take it that arse poster was the deal breaker?"

Ha ha ha - if only I'd had that much sense back then.

Ashamed to say I didn't run a mile immediately. Something was def. suss there since he made excuse after excuse when it came to the bedroom stuff (and at 18 I was a bit of alright even if I do say so myself )

That and arnie's arse and me moving to england mercifully strangled this budding 'romance'

Just accidentally laughed out loud at Mr Yoghurt Knob - eeeeewwwwwww to both the knob and the yoghurt. Of all the things he could have chosen to dip it in :)

DD looking at me as I'm falling about laughing........pmsl at white sock head ................oh this thread is giving me such a great laugh!