Dating Thread 243

[VenturingOut80]

The Rules:

1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. Know your worth.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

This mornings message from an Ourtime suitor - oh wow fit as f*ck

I give up 🏳️

SamW98 Don't think I'll be trying Ourtime! He probably thinks he's paying you a compliment 🙄

NervesOfCotton Still here! He hasn't got me.....yet 🤣

I messaged my speed dating matches almost straightaway. But it would depend on what I'm doing & how keen I was to carry on the chat.

NoDatingFor0ldMen
My profile actually mentions B&Q. And mowers 😆.
You don't come across as boring on here. But it does seem like Ms teacher has given your self confidence a battering.

NellyTheCake Me too. I often send a quick 'Thank you for the match, I'll be back in half an hour' (as I go & put the kids to bed) Sometimes they unmatch then which is fine. But just sending nothing at all makes the match pointless.

I matched with a new one today. All I've had back from him is

'Yes'
'No'
& 'Its raining'.

Why bother!

@NellyTheCake

I actually replied and said ‘is that how speak to women?’ And he replied ‘no sexy but got your attention 😘😘’

Another one deleted

Ohh I love B&Q on a Sunday morning, browsing the shiny lines of power tools, “oh look that one has as routing attachment - must have it”

2md only to Argos and the “Laminated Book of Dreams “

https://youtube.com/shorts/wuFBrpTtsVo?si=GaQ3h0OLImyaIJUl

Do females have to pay for our Time ?

I have a dating etiquette question. I recently plunged back into Bumble and got chatting to someone who seemed nice. We messaged back and forth for about an hour. He said he was going to bed, that it had been very nice chatting to me and let’s do it again sometime. I said yes, let’s chat again. It’s been a few days and I haven’t heard from him. Should I message him or was it a brush off?

You do have to remember that men evolved via picking up women in nightclubs and bars. We all did. it took 4 pints before we had the courage to dance near you and give our best moves.

Fast forward to 2023 and stone cold sober on an app, we’re pretty much still in the pond with gills. Lots of learning to be done.

And then meeting for “coffee” again stone cold sober with caffeine included, we have zero chance.

So anyone looking for a spark, forget it. 😂

Yes. I’ve paid for a month to see how it was but I’m not impressed.

@Wessexguy

How depressing and pathetic that so many 50 year old haven't matured since they were 13 😔

And there it is.

an attempt at light hearted chatter becomes “depressing and pathetic”.

Maybe why they go younger. Don't listen to him, he won't go even a few years older as it reminds him of his sister!

If you’ve got a beer gunt you’re not for me.

Friday night, fingers crossed in hopes that I'm noticed by a dashing suitor on OLD 😋🤞

How long has it been? @IDriveMySupernova Nobody knows, in the first stages of dates, there's no certain answer which is both exciting and confusing

@Wessexguy

Sounds like you need to realise that humour is difficult to convey is messages, and needs more awareness of how it's will
be construed in the absence of body language, facial expression and intonation, especially when done deadpan....

Three days

@IDriveMySupernova 3 days is too long IMHO

@IDriveMySupernova sounds like he was just passing time. Best advice I've seen here is if a man is interested, you'll know it. They will do all they can to set a date/take you off the proverbial market. If you have to wonder/ask these questions, then he isn't interested

@IDriveMySupernova in your position, if I was keen on the guy, I would have dropped him a message the following evening - if he doesn't respond you've lost nothing. However now it's been 3 days I agree with @Loopylooni in that he's probably not that fussed or messaging others currently. Nothing wrong with that as most multi message but it does mean he's probably more interested in someone else ...currently. The other option is that he's sitting there thinking the same of you of course but I do agree that when a man is keen you know and I'd say same of you as you didn't message either.

This is so true! I experienced that this year and I kept questioning what was going on.

You shouldn’t need to question, chase or anything. You usually know.

Got chatting with a guy last night but his circumstances might make dating difficult as he has his child every weekend! I applaud his wanting to spend time with them but don't see how that would work in reality.

I've looked at my list from this year - been on dates with 16 people - saw 2 of them twice and one 3 times 🤦‍♀️ think I can safely say this year has been a write off dating wise 😄

Well I had a super like on bumble this morning but he lives in Ohio 🤷‍♀️

Im out in London today for a friends birthday so maybe there’ll be a few out in the wild.

Hmm. He seemed keen as he sent me a compliment. I was pretty interested in him but I’m very shy when it comes to men, and I remembered the advice on here being that the woman shouldn’t have to chase anything, so I left it. But then I can also see it from the male perspective. It feels like such an etiquette minefield that I just want to run away.

I’ve also managed to do an accidental left-swipe on someone who probably liked me because it did that ‘you’ve missed a potential match’ thing. Really annoying.

I got 500 likes within 24 hours of signing up but I’ve been through most of them now and the only people I’ve liked out of any of them are the two I’ve mentioned, so I’m feeling a bit disheartened.

Tend to agree with @Slothmomma here, it’s no good just sitting on your hands - yes men will chase, to some extent, but men are also looking for that certain level of interest back and there are lots of people on OLD, if the guy is multi chatting ( he should be), and another woman shows some interest, that’s where his interest will go