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Original poster

WhatsApp

236 replies

LeilaM42 · 13/08/2023 10:47

I send someone a WhatsApp message 1 day ago and he’s not opened the message but I can see he’s been online. Is it possible he’s not got the message or is he ignoring me ?

OP posts:
SingingKlingon · 14/08/2023 20:50

Oh OP please don't message him. He's just not that into you!

Countless people have told you he's got the message!

Have you met him in person? Is this an Online dating contact?

Original poster
LeilaM42 · 14/08/2023 20:56

We’ve met, had amazing chemistry got on really well together. I just can’t make sense of it

OP posts:
Champagneponies · 14/08/2023 20:57

Please don't reply. You will look desperate.

Leave it. He may eventually message you. And if he does you shouldn't read it and DOUBLE the time he took to send you a message before you reply.

Trust me... This works.

Seryse · 14/08/2023 20:59

Stop. Don't text him, you look desperate doing that. He's not replying for whatever reason by his own choice so just leave it be and get on with your life.

Sooze2023 · 14/08/2023 21:01

This is how my friend's 3 year journey started ..... it will become a cycle.

Please OP, don't be too invested. You will get excited if/when he replies but it likely be a precedent to future communication with you hanging and waiting....

Watchkeys · 14/08/2023 21:02

LeilaM42 · 14/08/2023 20:56

We’ve met, had amazing chemistry got on really well together. I just can’t make sense of it

You will be able to make sense of a compatible partner. It really is that simple.

Why are you complicating it? Relationships aren't a puzzle, and don't feel like one.

Olika · 14/08/2023 21:13

How did you go from him not responding to your message now having met? Smile

Original poster
LeilaM42 · 14/08/2023 21:23

Olika · 14/08/2023 21:13

How did you go from him not responding to your message now having met? Smile

We met a few weeks ago, spent time together, there was definitely a spark there.
We opened up to each other, texted a lot! Sent photos and little videos. He often instigated the texting now on what’s app it’s saying he saw the message on Saturday at 1am and apparently he’s not been online since. Just seems odd he seemed so interested

OP posts:
Pottyberry · 14/08/2023 21:34

If he genuinely has not been online since, then it could be a lost or stolen phone or tech issue- but there's still no need to message again, as when he's back online he will see it.

If he's ignored your message, then again, no need to send anything.

Don't overthink - you've messaged, it's done.

StaunchMomma · 14/08/2023 21:44

OP, I don't mean this unkindly but I do mean it and it's a lesson I've learned myself, the hard way!

Men can smell desperation a mile away.

Some run from it, some use it to manipulate you.

The good ones don't ignore messages for ages, even though they've been on the platform, and try to keep you hanging.

Take some power back and move on.

Rollonsept · 14/08/2023 21:48

Some will talk to you in their free time and some will free time for you. OP @StaunchMomma I too have had to learn

QueSyrahSyrah · 14/08/2023 21:55

The 'last online' feature is a bloody curse. I've turned mine off so nobody can see mine and I can't see theirs. Much simpler.

Hiddenvoice · 14/08/2023 21:58

It seems that he’s either lost his phone, battery died or he’s just not been online due to other reasons.

Try not look at when someone’s online. I can be really invested in someone and love talking to them all the time but also need to cool it and deal with real life so I’m not glued to my phone.

Why not message him with a simple hi, how’s your day going? It’s open and gives him a chance to reply to you. It’s not too clingy and if he doesn’t want to reply then he doesn’t have to.

If it’s only one tick then don’t jump straight to you’re blocked. My dh regularly loses signal so my messages just have one grey tick. You’d know if you’re blocked as the picture will also disappear.
Your chat may be muted in which he doesn’t get notifications when you message or he has archived you when the messages still go through but in a separate folder and he will also not get any notifications.

Original poster
LeilaM42 · 14/08/2023 22:00

Hiddenvoice · 14/08/2023 21:58

It seems that he’s either lost his phone, battery died or he’s just not been online due to other reasons.

Try not look at when someone’s online. I can be really invested in someone and love talking to them all the time but also need to cool it and deal with real life so I’m not glued to my phone.

Why not message him with a simple hi, how’s your day going? It’s open and gives him a chance to reply to you. It’s not too clingy and if he doesn’t want to reply then he doesn’t have to.

If it’s only one tick then don’t jump straight to you’re blocked. My dh regularly loses signal so my messages just have one grey tick. You’d know if you’re blocked as the picture will also disappear.
Your chat may be muted in which he doesn’t get notifications when you message or he has archived you when the messages still go through but in a separate folder and he will also not get any notifications.

I really want to text rather than what’sapp but not sure if it’s pushy ?

OP posts:
Hiddenvoice · 14/08/2023 22:05

Personally I wouldn’t, it feels like you’ve been checking up on him and that’s why you’ve text. I would just WhatsApp again. If he likes you and wants more then he will be in touch soon.

Original poster
LeilaM42 · 14/08/2023 22:08

Hiddenvoice · 14/08/2023 22:05

Personally I wouldn’t, it feels like you’ve been checking up on him and that’s why you’ve text. I would just WhatsApp again. If he likes you and wants more then he will be in touch soon.

Think I’ll leave it as he’s not answered previous WhatsApp message

OP posts:
Mrstwiddle · 14/08/2023 22:21

Yes, leave it. He is patently not sufficiently interested and you're wasting your time. Plenty more fish in the sea!

Seryse · 14/08/2023 22:24

Another way to look at it....

He hasn't bothered to check if you replied to his message or not - if he was that interested in you he would have opened the convo by now to see if he'd missed a message from you or something if he hadnt heard from you in a few days surely, no?

It sucks, but you need to stop clutching at straws and move on to whatever makes you happy. As someone said further up some people can smell desperation and either run from it or abuse it.

TheAverageJoanne · 14/08/2023 22:27

JibbaJab · 13/08/2023 10:54

If it's got two grey ticks and they've been online then yeah they're just not clicking on it and they would see it's got unread messages in your chat with them.

I've got several messages that I've sent to people that have two grey ticks that haven't turned blue but the recipient has replied to me and they're still grey!

TheAverageJoanne · 14/08/2023 22:31

As in this image

WhatsApp
JibbaJab · 14/08/2023 22:33

@TheAverageJoanne I think it does that when you have read receipt turned off so unless they reply to it you don't know it's been read. I think.

TruthThatsHardAsSteel · 14/08/2023 22:40

Op listen to the majority and not the odd person telling you to make contact

Moving from WhatsApp to text (especially after he hasn't replied) makes you look ABSOLUTELY DESPERATE TO GET IN TOUCH.

You can have all these questions and scenarios in your head, but ultimately this is a very very unhealthy way to behave.

If he hasn't got your message, he will. If he's choosing not to reply, you making further contact makes it even worse, and gives him another opportunity to ignore you. Then you're back in exactly the same situation. Wondering and hoping and analysing and checking. Then what? Do you try to get in further contact to see if he got your text?

Draw a line and Step away from the situation. Let things happen organically.

If he's ghosted you or is in the process, you texting "did you get my WhatsApp?" just doesn't make you any more appealing. It just comes across as needy and attached.

I mean this kindly.

Original poster
LeilaM42 · 14/08/2023 22:42

TruthThatsHardAsSteel · 14/08/2023 22:40

Op listen to the majority and not the odd person telling you to make contact

Moving from WhatsApp to text (especially after he hasn't replied) makes you look ABSOLUTELY DESPERATE TO GET IN TOUCH.

You can have all these questions and scenarios in your head, but ultimately this is a very very unhealthy way to behave.

If he hasn't got your message, he will. If he's choosing not to reply, you making further contact makes it even worse, and gives him another opportunity to ignore you. Then you're back in exactly the same situation. Wondering and hoping and analysing and checking. Then what? Do you try to get in further contact to see if he got your text?

Draw a line and Step away from the situation. Let things happen organically.

If he's ghosted you or is in the process, you texting "did you get my WhatsApp?" just doesn't make you any more appealing. It just comes across as needy and attached.

I mean this kindly.

You are totally right

OP posts:
morbidd · 14/08/2023 22:42

OP can you just clear something up for us please?

Does his last seen say Saturday 00:40? Or are you saying he was last online at 01:00 and read your last message?

Your account seems to vary.

If you can see when he was last online and it was Saturday, then he literally hasn't been on his phone. So perhaps something has happened to him?

Original poster
LeilaM42 · 14/08/2023 22:43

I feel like such an idiot !

OP posts: