My 4.5 son HATES his name!!!

[Thefirstime]

It’s causing huge tantrums in our house - he hates it and is learning to write another name altogether.. such a shame.. my DH becoming frustrated with it..

someone mentioned to me that it could be to do with self esteem issues, already??

any advice??

People asking for the name are missing the point. The person who doesn't like the name is the child.

Ours at that age wanted to call themselves various names.
Hopefully it's a phase, unless a really odd name.
We just played along with it.

Is this OP with a name change, or someone guessing ?

Sorry, I'm with your son. I hated my name as it's a "unisex" one and I was born in the days when names were definitely either "boy's" or "girl's".

I never use it now except for formal stuff and am always known by a nickname I picked up at school.

If he really wants to change it - let him.

No - I assume it relates to the post directly before by the same poster and is the name her son didn't want.

Is it a foreign name? Sometimes not liking a name can be a focus of not fitting in for cultural/racial reasons.

That needs to be part of a bigger conversation.

The child is 4 years old ffs! He doesn't know what he likes and what he doesn't!

Ds used to hate his name as well but he was autistic and saying his name meant that you were wanting him to engage with you and he didn't want that. I called him Buster for a couple of years and he grew out of it. Other ds used to insist he was called Sonic and I have his school books from that time with his name Sonic 1 on the cover. His friend was Sonic 2 because he wanted to be called Sonic as well. I wouldn't fight him and call him by his chosen name, kudos to him learning to spell the name he wants if you ask me.

I loathe my name. Hate it, it has caused me a lot of trauma since childhood. Listen to your son. If you don’t want to go down the formal lane, at least find a nickname he prefers.

PP are making things up.

He wants the same name as his pal. That's it.

Listen to your child indeed. What happens when he only wants to eat ice cream?

@Lesina out of curiosity, why do you loathe your name? You can answer without saying what it is. Is it too common, or too rare, or associated with someone specific, or hard to pronounce/spell etc?

This, exactly.
He is a four-year-old going through a phase. When I was a similar age I wanted to be named Michelle, because there was a popular girl named Michelle at school. As an adult, I'm glad that my parents never indulged that.

This!!!! It's a phase. I went through that phase. I also went through the "same name, different spelling" phase and here I am back with the original name and spelling I was given. You chose that name for a reason. Can you explain to him why you liked it so much?

Agree with this. He’s 4 fgs. If he was 15 and hated it, then I might suggest changing it, but at 4 they changetheir mind on everything. They try pushing boundaries at this age, and once you start giving in to their every whim, you’re going to create a spoilt self entitled individual.

I wouldn't even let them call themselves/be called whatever they like at school etc. That could compound it so it lasts longer.

He thinks his friend is cool so he wants his friend's name.

In a few months time he'll be on about something else.

I was around his age when i remember absolutely detesting my name. I still hate it now and ive voiced many MANY a time how much i dislike it and dont want to be called it and my mum will still occasionally call me it or write it in cards etc knowing that. I use it legally and thats it. I even had my work email changed so i dont get called it at work. I use a shortened version and threw in an extra letter so my full name doesnt get guessed. Its how people with my accent say it aswell, its horrendous

My DD decided she wanted to be called a shortened version of her name at 3 1/2. 10 years later she’s stuck to it and is always known as that now, we haven’t changed it officially though, although I’ve always said that it’s her name and if she wants to change it then she can.

With all due respect OP, get a life and stop pandering to a 4 plus year old questioning their name? Is so awful, or just not the “fashion” at the moment?

Unless you’re mega rich and can get away with calling them peaches, or pineapple, then why all this angst🙄

Is it *

At 6 DS1 insisted on being called 'Bruce Wayne'. We had no problem with but told him that at school it had to be his 'secret identity' so he have to go by his 'other name' there. . He thought that was pretty cool.

I've always disliked my name. In my culture we often choose spirit or 'secret' names so I chose the name I wanted for my spirit name. No one uses it but me and that's just fine.

Can’t judge and make any kind of useful response without knowing the name

Does he have a middle name he can use
Or a ‘take’ on his surname
Jones becomes Jon, jonesy
Harrison becomes Harry
Etc.
I had a family name and a school name…neither of which were my actual name.
Then at Uni I ended up with another nickname.

Listen to your child indeed. What happens when he only wants to eat ice cream?

Letting a child only eat ice cream is going to cause them health problems, what is the harm in letting them use another name, or have longer or shorter hair?

I'm betting his name is Quentin and he's wanting to change it to Tyrannosaurus Rex.

At 4.5 I’d be smiling and nodding and not catering to him liking his mate’s name better.

That just seems really over the top. I disliked the fact I was named after a horse and went through a phase of disliking the name. No way would my parents pander to that, especially at 4.