Dating Thread 242 - Mid-Summer daters

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The Rules:

1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. Know your worth.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

Total weirdo. Lucky escape Sam

I should add we HAVE NOT DTD… this is a deal breaker for me. If we don’t work out sexually… it’s not right for me. Let’s see what happens when it definitely happens. Other than that I’m amazed at how lovely he is ( 6’3” and very handsome too)

I’m 6’ and the woman I’m dating is taller than me ( sooo nice not to stoop when kissing )

So happy to see you back @PinkIdentity !! You are the wisest and loveliest and we miss you!
So pleased you have met a proper someone 😄😄

@NoDatingFor0ldMen I'm usually taller than the majority of my irons though tonight's claims to be 6' 4" like Mr city so we'll see. The guy I saw back in Oct lied about his height claiming he was 6 foot but there's no way he didn't know that was false as he's in military and surely they measure you at some point. Anyway he joked about how he'd clearly got his height wrong when he was actually my height at best - despite this he is still on apps claiming he's 6 foot 😄

I had exactly the same! Said he was 6’ on the app, but in reality he was 5’ 7” or 8”. I have no issue with height but I do have an issue with lies.

I'm 5' 9" so accept I'm usually taller or similar height but think it funny to maintain the lie when openly admitted to.getting it "wrong"

The date I went on last week said he was 5’10 but was shorter than me (Im 5’7)

Do they think we won’t notice?

It's a difficult one. Met someone last night 'in the wild'🤣 who is very attractive and seemed attracted to me. He is probably about 5.10 stop shorter than I would want on paper but so nice that I will go out with him off he asks. Haven't dared do OLD but can can see that c it v is brutal in filtering on height and age that in RL wouldn't happen.

@Slothmomma
the woman I’m seeing told me she was 6’ 1”, but I think she might actually be taller than that , never seen her in heels, always flats or boots

They think if they give us enough alcohol we’ll stop caring. Well I don’t drink so that ain’t gonna happen matey {insert finger wagging emoticon here} 😆.

But seriously. If you’re 5’ 7” then say so. It won’t make any difference as to which way I swipe.

And, yes the app will let you change your age. Just email them 🤔.

Yep, when you meet people IRL all the height/ age stuff goes out of the window, if you like them then you like them

So here is an interesting question

the person I’m seeing told me she was 6’ 1”, but I suspect she is actually taller, which is a lie really, but I think she might say it so not to put off potential suitors, rather than attempting to attract potential suitors ( or maybe it is to attract potential suitors)
but it’s obvious really

Well 6’ for a woman is skewing definitely to one extreme. So to be honest I wouldn’t judge her at all. If she said she was 5’ 9” I would judge because that is a lie rather than slightly misleading. If you only suspect she’s taller then it can’t be that much difference can it? Like, she’s not 6’ 6” is she.

A slight manipulation of figures is okay. Changing too much is not okay. Especially because she probably has experience of men not being interested if she puts her real height.

@GoingToBeLessRubbishAtLife oh yes, I’m sure you are exactly right, she is probably more like 6 3, & that is going to put some of men off, so she rolls a couple of inches off

A woman going from 6’ 3” to 6’ feels very different from a man going from 5’ 7” to 6’. Understandable in one case, vain in the other. And I don’t think I’m saying it’s understandable only because she’s a woman, I’m not siding with her for that reason.

I was talking to someone I worked with (same organisation never worked together) for a little while. His OLD profile said he was 5'10. I'm 5'6. We're the same height. As if I wasn't going to notice? But as 5'6 is short for guy I can understand it from a dating perspective and not trying to put people off- he really was very attractive and had a decent personality to boot. I'm really not the type of person to judge by height though.

Mr Analogue who I went on a date with yesterday is my height but he left the height bit of his profile blank. He also told me not to wear heels if I didn't want to be taller than him 😂 which I personally think was a good way of handling it. The date was amazing though. I'm feeling a bit warm and fuzzy about it today.

VanillaSox

Im rare on this thread in that I’m not majorly fussed on height
like so what ? It’s people , their character and chemistry 🧪 that matters most for me

Itssnotunusual
that’s so nice 😊

Oh no! So disappointed for you, but another lucky escape. This guy sounds very insecure. Onwards and upwards 💪🏻

A little update from me. Not heard a peep from Mr Music since we had a catch up the other week. Disappointed but it was heading that way.

I definitely invested too much and probably will do for the next man I like I’ll try not to, but I think this is just how I am. Working on it!

I'm not massively bothered by height either - my ex dh was shorter than me - but I see no point in lying about it.

Had my date last night with 6' 4" who was not 6' 4" 😄 He was taller but not by much.

Anyway, no spark at all. We chatted ok but he just seemed so much older in person - I knew he was 8 years older but he just looked and acted so much older in person so just didn't do it for me. I wonder whether he's actually been flexible about his age too 🤔 I sent a message after thanking him for meeting but saying that sure he agreed that chemistry not there which he's read but not replied to.

After finally having my date with Mr Analogue I may have to let Mr Scott go. Whilst Mr Scott was pretty lovely and on paper brilliant there wasn't really a spark. It was a great date and he was a nice person to spend time around but based on his messages after it's about sex for him. Which is fine- sex is great! But it would feel stupid jeopardising an actual human connection with Mr Analogue for great sex.

The date with Mr Analogue was one of those dates where time just disappears on you. We met up at 2pm and I felt like I had blinked and it was 10:30pm. We had lots in common (including some really obscure stuff!) and he's definitely my type of person. I showed my mum his OLD profile whilst we were still in the talking stage and she commented on the fact that he's very 'Me' if that makes sense?

I've never really felt that comfortable about someone so quickly which is making me a bit wary though! It was a very wholesome kind of date. We're seeing each other again next week and going for a walk around a local historical landmark weather permitting. I'm quite looking forward to it!

I've never been majorly fussed about height either! Imagine the great people that get overlooked because of a number they have zero control over!

Though I do understand that it's an attraction factor for some and would be a deal breaker for a lot of people. Not for me though!

Brilliant stuff…being with someone you feel strong connection is key. You’ve had a magical date and that is what this is about. Chemistry happens there…

I was quite optimistic about the date as there seemed to be pretty great chemistry via messages. A similar sense of humour and background ect. I'm was really glad it was the case in person though!

He's very tactile (in a totally gentlemanly fashion) and touch is definitely my love language 🙈