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Original poster

Possible Emma Thompson Moment

337 replies

MaybeAgain2023 · 06/07/2023 22:33

It’s my birthday next week

9 years ago DH had a short affair. We worked through it and all has been fine for a number of years.

OW had a significant birthday this week. I’ve noticed a transaction on the online bank account, which I never look at (via PayPal which he rarely uses). This set my spidery senses going. It’s from a store I never shop at and I didn’t know that he knew it even existed.

I’m now waiting to see if this present materialises. If it doesn’t it’s a deal breaker. I’m on zero tolerance.

Feeling nervous

OP posts:
Cinnamope · 07/07/2023 00:34

Hope it all works out for you

AcrossthePond55 · 07/07/2023 00:36

Fingers crossed for you. This is going to be a tough waiting period for you and I hope he lives up to his 'promises' when you decided to stay with him.

Reddog1 · 07/07/2023 00:40

I think that you’d have had an inkling over the last nine years tbh OP. Especially with his history. I suppose they could’ve reconnected very recently though. Or it could be a new girlfriend.

You’ll have a better idea on your birthday. I’m really hoping that you get a £200 bag/dress/necklace from that shop.

Verbena17 · 07/07/2023 00:42

Could you ask him something like “let me know if you need any b’day ideas to get me”.

or

“You have remembered what big day it is the week after next haven’t you?”

CrazyArmadilloLady · 07/07/2023 00:43

Verbena17 · 07/07/2023 00:42

Could you ask him something like “let me know if you need any b’day ideas to get me”.

or

“You have remembered what big day it is the week after next haven’t you?”

He knows it’s her birthday and has already got her something.

It’s just whether or not this additional gift is also for the OP.

SemperIdem · 07/07/2023 00:48

I hope it’s just a surprise gift for you, op.

marblemad · 07/07/2023 01:10

The relationship was essentially over the minute he cheated on you and it is no longer a genuine relationship because you are living constantly on edge. Cut your losses and move on.

Princessconsuelabananahammock9 · 07/07/2023 02:03

I am so sorry you are dealing with this. I hope it's something amazing for you. 💓 Xx

TumbleweedRolling · 07/07/2023 02:34

It’s been 9 years?
Do you think he’s still in contact with her?
All this time?

powershowerforanhour · 07/07/2023 02:48

"The relationship was essentially over the minute he cheated on you and it is no longer a genuine relationship because you are living constantly on edge. Cut your losses and move on."

Oh come on. OP wasn't on edge till this and it's completely understandable that she is. As for "YOU DON'T TRUST HIM" well it's a bit of a "Trust in Allah..but tie up your camel" thing.

OP, I really hope you get the necklace not the Joni Mitchell CD.

Frogpond · 07/07/2023 02:50

Sending hugs. It could be for you. But screenshot the transaction. Just in case he realises and makes it so you can’t view the account.

Fraaahnces · 07/07/2023 03:12

What day is your birthday next week @MaybeAgain2023? I hope to check in and discover that he’s bought you something utterly gorgeous. Does he have form for being generous with birthdays or is he a typical husband who gets you a token, last-minute present?

cantgetabus · 07/07/2023 03:39

I really hope it's for you too ❤️

electriclight · 07/07/2023 03:57

I had my own Emma Thompson moment but did not forgive him and we separated. I really do hope it's for you op, that he deserved your forgiveness.

Lacucuracha · 07/07/2023 04:27

I hope it’s for you. Be careful not to act differently in case he gets an inkling and buys one for you too.

OpheliaPlum · 07/07/2023 04:27

Good luck op

Threesmycrowd · 07/07/2023 04:29

Good luck. Really hoping it's for you x

Handholdplease85 · 07/07/2023 04:47

Hope it is for you but like pp says get your ducks in a row just in case. Or if not then if it doesn’t turn out to be for you, make sure you get yourself sorted before you reveal to him that you know. Don’t make yourself financially vulnerable in the longer run.

Slimeandputty · 07/07/2023 05:18

I'm sorry you are going through this op. Did you notice things were not as good between you while your husband was having an affair before? If things are good now I would try not to worry. X

Willmafrockfit · 07/07/2023 05:25

that sounds like a horrible situation to be in op, this level of mistrust.

Toothiepegg · 07/07/2023 05:53

I really hope that it is for you. 💐

oaktreeme · 07/07/2023 05:57

Fingers crossed it's yours OP

Theos · 07/07/2023 06:08

Clothing is generally risky

greyhairnomore · 07/07/2023 06:10

Knackeredhamster · 06/07/2023 22:43

Blimey op. How raw for you, that you immediately feel this is the reason for the purchase.

Do you have any birthday or celebration coming up?

What made you check the account I wonder, was it because you knew the ow had this coming up?

It's her birthday next week as well as OW.

moneymatr · 07/07/2023 06:12

It's completely normal to be concerned. I think most women would be in this situation and more so given the affair and the birthday. I really hope it's for you op.

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