Cheating or coincidence?!?

[TheyAreMyBhunasPete]

So a couple of weeks ago, my husband suddenly starts a health kick. Wants to start eating more protein, press ups in the living room. I ask him what's brought this on and he says he wants to look better for me. I notice also his sex drive suddenly increases. We joke and I say something like "if I posted this online on mn or some advice page everyone would be convinced you are having an affair" we laugh. I have no worries.

Anyway, fast forward to now when he's mentioned it stings when he pees and he's got these ulcers on his penis. We have an appointment for tomorrow at a clinic.

Can this be a coincidence? Surely not? Sahm with baby so my life would very much implode

I can't quite believe I'm reading this...

Because it takes two to have sex!

Just because his sex drive has increased doesn't mean the OPs has, or that she's obliged to have sex with him just because he's horny.

Or do you believe all women are handmaids who's vagina has to be available on demand for their man, regardless of how they might be feeling?

Yeah, I mean when I was recovering from childbirth with a new baby under a year old, my DH often had take matters into his own hands because sex was the last thing on my mind.

His sex drive has increased because he works with an attractive younger woman all day that probably gets his juices flowing.

However, I doubt this is linked to his problems down stairs, that's probably just coincidence, and could just be as simple as a result of his recent changes in his diet.

Yes a doctor can. A blood test for HSV 1 and 2 antibodies will tell you if it is a new infection or an old one that has been dormant. If it’s a new infection (as in he cheated and just caught it) there won’t be any antibodies as it takes until at least 4 months post infection for there to be HSV antibodies in your blood.

I mention both HSV 1 and 2 as both can cause genital sores, although HSV 2 is the one that is an STI as HSV 1 is the cold sore one and that can be easily transmitted by sharing a cup or water bottle and then later on causes sores on the genitals.

I forgot to mention, that when you are infected with HSV, you have an initial flare of sores from a few days to 2 weeks after infection…but then it takes 4 months for there to be HSV antibodies. So if you have sores but not antibodies= new infection. Sores + antibodies = dormant infection flaring up.

“His sex drive has increased because he works with an attractive younger woman all day that probably gets his juices flowing.”

While no studies exist to indicate that working with attractive people increases sex drive, there are many studies that show increasing exercise increases sex drive.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-roots-health/202110/can-excercise-give-your-sex-life-boost

Very interesting! Thanks for that info

How did he get on at his appointment OP? Hope all went well

Have u been tested yet? Or him? What's the verdict

Then what did you mean by not being worried about STIs as you've only had intercourse once but other stuff was fair game?

Did you mean that you dont think you can catch STIs if you only have sex once?

No I meant we only had sex once months so I'm not concerned as it was before all this happened 🙂

He ended up going in today as appt yesterday he cancelled and they did a full screen on him so hopefully the results come soon!

Gotcha 😊

@TheyAreMyBhunasPete
Did they give any indication about what they thought it was?

Did you go with him ?

Make sure you see the results.

I would have thought they'd at least give an opinion.

Make sure you actually see those results and don't rely on him telling you what they are.

Didn't go with him but they said they weren't sure apparently. I will be making sure I see the results

Update. He got a phone call today saying they were negative so we are all good! Worried for nothing 😁

My friend caught warts of his friends towels, his friend had them was a bit of a player, he caught warts of him after having a bath at his and using the same towel.

OP at sexual health clinic, they only routinely test for Chlamydia, Gonorrhoea, HIV, Hepatitis and Syphilis. They don't routinely rest for Heroes because:

1. It's so common and there's no "cure" apart from symptomatic treatment
2. The test shows negative unless it's in the middle of an attack.

If they actually did a swab from the open lesions on his penis, and that was negative, that's more reassuring.

*Herpes (which presents classically as ulcers on penis and stinging urination)

so what is it thats causing the issue then?

Umm, I'm not really sure that you are all good 😬