Dating Thread 240 - Early Summer Lovin

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The Rules:

1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. Know your worth.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

AMEN ! 😘

I wish I was shocked/surprised at some of the rude, entitled and nasty behaviour that people are experiencing. But sadly, it seems to be the norm rather than the exception.

My current rant is men who look nothing like their photos. I know women do it as well.
Two dates last week. First one had photos of him looking smart in a suit and working out at the gym. They must be at least 5 years old because he had a big beer belly and turned up in scruffy jeans and an oversized tshirt. I didn't recognise him.

Second one had also used very out of date photos. Fortunately he still looked like his photos, just less hair and an older looking face.

And then they say 'oh, you look just like your photos'. There's a surprise because they were taken in the last few weeks.

I had that.

It was when I was stupid and low enough to put my size in my profile 😳

He was at least 2 or 3 stone heavier than his photos, (I prefer a dad bond though really) and his fingers were yellow so 'occasional smoker' my arse.

Again, the old me, accepted it and in fact looked forward to meeting him again. Next evening I was ghosted and blocked.

@Definitelycross OUCH! looked forward to meeting him - smokers fingers and all. I can imagine what his breath was like. I think you did worse than me in the early days 😂😂

In my OLD days I also went to a date where the guy looked a lot older and another date with a profesional liar who was 63 years old!! He looked a lot younger really but this is the guy who overdosed on viagra without telling me and gave me cystitis as he was like a fucking rabbit with soft wobbly consistent erection. Shit sex. It happens. All blah blah and nothing. I run back to Mr Ex afterwards and although we were friends then… ended up DTD ( and it was sublime)

Sat waiting for my date
He's 30 mins late 🤦‍♀️
Feel like a clip just sat here

And the bar I chose just threw me out coz they close at 5 😂😂😂 couldn't make it up

Can you message him?

I wouldnt! why cant he message to say he's running late? I'd call it a day tbh.
very inconsiderate of him!

He should have sent you message he was running late…what a cxnt! Let us know what he said

Yeah, never thought of that.

He did call
And did turn up
Seemed to go ok but I'm crap at gauging these things
I'll let you know how it goes

@Definitelycross that was me .. I had to rearrange the meal out for next weekend but it’s still going ahead. I only bumped into him again yesterday in a different cafe which made us laugh. I had my children with me too so he’s met them like it or not.. you couldn’t make this all up. Anyway he’s still cheerful so treating it just as a meal out and a new local friend

@Definitelycross did you hear from MrIncognito?

@NoDatingForOldMen welcome to the zone..🤦‍♀️🫤

boomerang is Deffy?? What am I missing??

Hi everyone, I have my first online date this week, eek. This leads me to ask... what do you wear on a first date?? We're just going for afternoon coffee, so very casual. He seems quite laid back.
I'm finding the rules at the beginning of the thread really helpful as a reality check, but I find despite my best efforts I'm really getting my hopes up because his messages are great and consistent. For work and family reasons this week was the earliest we could meet, so we've been messaging for a little while.

Jesus it's like Deffy top trumps on here.

I had that then the guy turned it around that me being cross about him not turning up meant I wasn't ready for a relationship and was too possessive. Fuck him

Yes 🤫

Oh I'm so pleased.

I imagine you like in that show - is it Motherland?

I tend to dress up a bit but the guy never has 🙄

So, dress and boots.

But now I wear trousers and a nice top - sounds dull but it's not - honest 😂

One thing I realised early on was dress to your style because you have to be your genuine self. My style is a bit 'different' but I want them to see the real me.

Does that make sense or sound wanky?? 😳😂

@Definitely - that makes sense, thank you. I was thinking something like a dress, but most of mine are work dresses. My jeans tend to slide down and look saggy 🤦🏻‍♀️
I'm a size 14 and slightly self conscious of my stomach area so avoid anything clingy, although I don't think it's enormous.

Still on the search for the nice top to to wear with jeans - even more elusive than a decent man 😁

Another thing. You say you're self conscious about your tummy please don't say that when you're out. Rock your look and appear self confident.

I think one of the most important things I've ever learnt is don't draw attention to your flaws or perceived flaws. It makes people look when they might not have ever noticed.

Good luck 😉

😂😂😂