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Original poster

Dating Thread 240 - Early Summer Lovin

1000 replies

qqq82 · 29/03/2023 07:57

The Rules:

1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

  1. Develop a thick skin.
  2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
  3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
  4. Trust your gut instinct.
  5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
  6. Know your worth.
  7. If it's not fun, stop.
  8. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

OP posts:
PinkIdentity · 14/04/2023 17:22

Esmejane81 · 14/04/2023 16:59

Is it ok if I join this chat?

Recently single after 9 years of marriage and prior to that was in another long relationship … thinking about dating - but a bit daunted by the whole OLD thing …

Interested to know how people are finding it?

Welcome Esmejane!

Thisisworsethananticpated · 14/04/2023 17:50

5thWisdom

hey , no I’m not online right how

it’s been a tad frenetic and I keep saying I won’t , I’m having a break yada yada
but recent iron was VERY persistent …

problem is I get bored !! So to create some drama and ‘excitement ‘ I go OLD

VanillaSox · 14/04/2023 17:54

Welcome @Esmejane81 !
This is a lovely group of supportive people - you have found a good tribe!

Esmejane81 · 14/04/2023 18:29

Thank you! It’s nice to have other people in the same situation. I feel ready to start dating but having had two really long relationships feel like a complete newbie to it, which isn’t a great feeling!

ANOTHERnewstart · 15/04/2023 00:19

Opinions please wise ones!

2 been chatting to 2 potentials for a week now.
They are burn lovely & have both asked to meet.
man 1 asks quite a lot of questions & appears interested in getting to know me..
man 2 asks some questions but I feel has a lot of ‘I’ reply’s and doesn’t reciprocate a question with asking me anything back.
Would you still meet him?! I’m out of the loop!

TeaandLemonDrizzle · 15/04/2023 05:26

ANOTHERnewstart · 15/04/2023 00:19

Opinions please wise ones!

2 been chatting to 2 potentials for a week now.
They are burn lovely & have both asked to meet.
man 1 asks quite a lot of questions & appears interested in getting to know me..
man 2 asks some questions but I feel has a lot of ‘I’ reply’s and doesn’t reciprocate a question with asking me anything back.
Would you still meet him?! I’m out of the loop!

I think I wouldn’t bother with man 2. He doesn’t sound that interested.

NellyTheCake · 15/04/2023 06:51

ANOTHERnewstart · 15/04/2023 00:19

Opinions please wise ones!

2 been chatting to 2 potentials for a week now.
They are burn lovely & have both asked to meet.
man 1 asks quite a lot of questions & appears interested in getting to know me..
man 2 asks some questions but I feel has a lot of ‘I’ reply’s and doesn’t reciprocate a question with asking me anything back.
Would you still meet him?! I’m out of the loop!

I would meet both. Man 2 might be better in person. You might not like man 1 when you meet him.

However, it depends on you and whether you have the time to meet to both.

Original poster
qqq82 · 15/04/2023 07:40

@ANOTHERnewstart I'd meet both too. People can be completely different in real life to texting .

OP posts:
TeaandLemonDrizzle · 15/04/2023 07:56

qqq82 · 15/04/2023 07:40

@ANOTHERnewstart I'd meet both too. People can be completely different in real life to texting .

I met a man 2. He strung me along for months and always lacked interest in this way. I had to ask him outright in the end and he confirmed he didn’t think we had much in common. He was very similar in his texts. Hence, why I said don’t bother with man 2. However, like you said, he could be completely different in real life.

ANOTHERnewstart · 15/04/2023 08:30

Thanks all.
Man 1: L
Man 2: A (for any future questions!)

It’s things like this..
Me: ‘so do you have siblings?’
A: A long winded answer with no ‘you?’ asked back.
Man L: answers then says ‘how about you?’ He also
asks a lot off his own back

It’s the same for a lot of questions yet he does ask about some things which is why I’m unsure!
So consequently I know lots about A but he wouldn’t know what drink I liked?!
And L does. I wonder if he will be like it in RL. He has no children (which I’ve found a few times in the past makes them a little selfish) as they have no one else to worry about apart from themselves.
L has had kids.

midnightblue12 · 15/04/2023 08:39

Esmejane81 · 14/04/2023 16:59

Is it ok if I join this chat?

Recently single after 9 years of marriage and prior to that was in another long relationship … thinking about dating - but a bit daunted by the whole OLD thing …

Interested to know how people are finding it?

I'm in the same boat!
My last relationship was 10 years with 2 children.
I've been single for 3 years and I'm feeling the void!
I just have no confidence or experience but I know that I'm ready to move on... I just don't know where to start in a modern world!

strategichearts · 15/04/2023 08:44

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Slothmomma · 15/04/2023 10:21

Second date with Mr gig last night was fun - meal and then moved on for drinks - lots of kissing but I declined an invite back to his

Underwaterlife · 15/04/2023 11:13

Hi all. And welcome newbies. I feel bad that I am not contributing more to other people's posts.... just a bit short on time with it being Easter hols.

@NoDatingForOldMen I have sent the first message 4 times now and had dates with two and good chats with the other 2. I've no issue with doing that although I need to see keenness from them later on.

My update: I started on this thread having been a bit burned by my first OLD date.... ended up as a ONS when I thought I was agreeing to a more respectful FWB. I shall call him Mr FB as he has resurfaced and I have decided to get a bit of practice in with him whilst I see what is happening with Mr Tall (sounds like a mister man). I've had 2 dates with him despite having reservations due to his life circumstances and am now a bit smitten (cautiously). He is a real gent and it looks like date 3 might be on the cards but we have not so much as kissed yet. I feel conflicted about shenanigans with Mr FB but I really am so out of practice and he is a willing volunteer.

I'm still chatting to 2 others, one of whom wants to meet and is a bit huffy that I've said I am waiting to see what happens with Mr Tall.

ThePredictableScript · 15/04/2023 12:43

I've come out of a 18yr marriage 5 months ago and joined Tinder. Wow some of the men on there! Like who would swipe! I feel like I spot a red flag with everyone aghh. I'm destined to be single forever but would rather be than with a shitty headache of a man. I have my first date on Monday but he doesn't text much so if that carries on after the date then in the bin he goes. Happy I've found this thread 😁 anyone got any dates weekend?

PinkIdentity · 15/04/2023 12:51

No kids…middle aged… hmmm… I would pass. L looks nice though and more similar to you perhaps @ANOTHERnewstart

PinkIdentity · 15/04/2023 13:36

Slothmomma · 15/04/2023 10:21

Second date with Mr gig last night was fun - meal and then moved on for drinks - lots of kissing but I declined an invite back to his

Slothy…is this going ok? Or you are not sure about him??? Are you wary of DTD and prefer to wait?

PinkIdentity · 15/04/2023 13:42

Mr Tall still looks like a good bet. I think FB is just fine as you are getting more comfortable with yourself and your body and your sexuality. You are not exclusive ( yet) with Mr Tall. You haven’t kissed or DTD. Just relax and see what happens 😊

Slothmomma · 15/04/2023 14:13

PinkIdentity · 15/04/2023 13:36

Slothy…is this going ok? Or you are not sure about him??? Are you wary of DTD and prefer to wait?

Show quote history

@PinkIdentity I'm on fence so taking it slow. I find him very attractive and he's more confident than I thought he'd be - but I've decided that this year I'm in no rush with any of them to speed things along into a relationship or jump into bed early with any. I'm very busy with life, kids, work and coursework and am doing just fine getting out and about, on my freetime, having fun with friends, my new fwsbs (friends with snog benefits) and dating so I'll just see how it plays out

PinkIdentity · 15/04/2023 15:47

Very wise Slothy…enjoy

Thisisworsethananticpated · 15/04/2023 16:21

ANOTHERnewstart

I had someone like that and then I met him and he was worse !! Texts can be misleading however

Thisisworsethananticpated · 15/04/2023 16:24

I did hear from not named iron but a one word message !
he’s not chatty , so ill match his energy
I’ve been travelling last few days to collect kids
exhausting ! But had a much nicer time , people are friendly and might take laptop there and work a bit this summer

Thisisworsethananticpated · 15/04/2023 16:55

Slothmomma

food for you
you know now what’s works and doesn’t t work to have dating be enjoyable for you

Thisisworsethananticpated · 15/04/2023 16:55

Good for you I meant obvs

Esmejane81 · 15/04/2023 17:36

@midnightblue12 we can both start together! It looks like everyone on here can give us some good advice 😊

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