Dating Thread 239 - spring fling

[Thisisworsethananticpated]

I couldn’t think of a decent as it’s been so fractious ! Will post rules shortly

I think so too. We need to change the narrative that they're lucky.

What a coincidence.

I had a date with a guy turned out he was friends with another one I was speaking to 😳 first guy ghosted me so went for second - sleaze bucket, but lesson learned ish.

So, quick update from truth and nothing but the truth change of profile details.

Flurry of non suitables within half an hour. Then dribs and drabs throughout, but was ruthless.

Two guys I messaged - thanks but no thanks - from them

Another two guys I messaged - chatting but not making much effort, like one line answers

Last guy I messaged - real potential, great vibe - you're stunning, thank you so much for messaging. Just messaged to say he can never see himself coming to my city after all but we could be friends - so I said thank you and bye.

Quite a lot of action for a few hours on App.

We go again. But no settling

You are the prize @Definitelycross keep going until you find an attractive, intelligent, kind and funny man who gets this.

And mine. I put it on my profile in the end, with a little joke. I am SO sick of people going on and on about it. Do they think I don’t know?! 🤣

I think having really carefully chosen pictures helps. All my dates (who have been generally nice and decent. I haven’t really had any ghastly dates!) have commented on them, and said it’s what attracted them, and a friend said they capture who I am. I’m doing daft things like climbing trees and pitching a tent in the rain in them. No made up or studio shots, because that’s just not me, and they might as well get used to it from the outset. I also stole a tip from Pug and put a picture of my kid in with her back to the camera (which also has my dogs and camp set up in the background) which makes it obvious what my set up is, and the kind of thing you will usually find me doing. It seems to have really shaped my tinder experience in a positive way.

(Apologies if I’m horribly tactless anywhere, I’ve missed a couple of weeks, and I don’t want to be replying to out if date posts, so I’m just reading the last couple of pages and then I’ll work back and catch up)

That's really interesting. I also felt I needed to put guys at their ease a bit. I think dating does weigh very heavily on guys, so I tried to be very upfront about what I wanted and what I was open to (whilst maintaining suitable decorum of course. Well, mostly). But the guys I have really liked haven't needed me too. They've had something about them that meant I felt they could handle it. And me (I'm a bit of a handful. 'Feisty' is the word that most often comes up when guy friends describe me. I don't know why, I hate confrontation!)

Hello Eeky … how’s it going with Mr ( was it Pottery?) . I don’t remember but you were quite happy with your Mr.

@Eeksteek

And mine. I put it on my profile in the end, with a little joke. I am SO sick of people going on and on about it. Do they think I don’t know?! 🤣*
*
Which bit do you do? Sorry it's late and my brain is crazy tired

Height. I’m teeny. And people always comment. Do they think I haven’t noticed I’m only 5 foot tall until they pointed it out?! 🤣🙄🤣

Scarily well. I’m happy, he’s happy, my kid loves him. The dogs adore him. I’m terrified I’m going to do something naively inappropriate for the stage we are at and ruin it. He just hugs me and says he’s happy with everything and he’s here for me.

@Eeksteek yes I get where you're coming from. We walk around at this height all the time so it's not actually a surprise for us 🤦‍♀️😂

Mind you sometimes I wonder if they ever read the bio and just click like on the picture 🙄
I get asked lots of things that are right there 🙄

I'm so glad it's going well for you and that all the important people (and animals) around you are happy too. ❤️

Eeky… so glad for you. This niggly feeling of “ something will go wrong” is totally normal. I love the fact your kid is also happy and loves him too. Enjoy and relax

Great news @Eeksteek - lovely to read your update.

As for me, haven't heard any further from Mondays date so I'm assuming I'll hear no more. Fridays date is still keen and I'm quite looking forward to having a night out with him. Also started chatting to two new matches last night, one of which messaged this morning and said he'll message again tonight. Will let you all know how tomorrow's date goes

Eeksteek
Slothmomma

I have heard from my Monday date

however I offered a walk as this weekends is super busy
I think (fair enough !) he’s up for more of a hook up
And I’m not right now
so let’s see if we have our walk ….

Eeksteek

sorry ! Meant to say all sounds good 😌
stay happy 😊

Worsy…don’t hurt yourself. A walk is a nice thing and if you can’t or will not do fuckbuddery it is absolutely fine too. You are in charge

PinkIdentity

you are right
a walk is a nice thing and he doesn’t know his neighbourhood that well (I do )

anyway I met him FEELD so ..

but this imposing boundaries (better late than never ) is going to be interesting
ibe been shit with boundaries for a staggering 32 years
oy vey

Doesn’t matter. Never late to put boundaries in place and protect your feelings

What site are you using?

Ladies…what’s your favourite dating app?

I’m struggling to find anyone and I’ve used Bumble, Hinge and Tinder. I paid for a year’s subscription to Tinder but currently have it set to incognito. I deleted Hinge and snoozing on Bumble.

I’m just not getting anywhere. Most men are not to my fancy at all and the odd one that does seem ok usually shows little interest and after a day or two I un-match them.

Im 50, quite attractive for my age, in a good career and a sweet person (ha ha). I’m also extremely passionate not that I’d let them into that one so early on. I’ve been out of a 23 year marriage for 3 years.

Recently lost my remaining sibling and parents all gone now too so I am feeling extremely lonely and down.

Which app is the best? Am I missing something?

TeaandLemonDrizzle

the best for me was Hinge but I’m in a big city
tinder was mixed but sooo many people
inner circle didn’t meet anyone

Feeld is a sex app

Im very sorry for your losses
bear jn mind that OLD can be … brutal !

have you got other hobbies and activities on the go ?

@Thisisworsethananticpated

No hobbies as I don’t really have the time. My job is full on and mentally draining so I often tired out in the evenings. I also have my 15 year old daughter who lives with me so it’s difficult to get out much - although I would make the effort for a nice man!

@Thisisworsethananticpated

I’m going to London next week (alone) for a week of ‘me time’ so maybe I should join Hinge and find a Londoner! 😂 Joke!

TeaandLemonDrizzle
I'm mid 50s, live in a small city.
I'm on Match, Pof, tinder bumble.

Tinder and bumble have been useless.
Match was ok for about a month, I got a couple of dates. But I wouldn't recommend it.

I've now paid for 3mths on pof and I'm finding that I'm getting a lot more attention.
I can see who's viewed and liked me. And decide if I want to message them.
It's expensive but an investment if you're serious about finding someone.

The simple answer, though, is that it is down to luck and timing. Different apps work for different people, depending on age, location etc.

And having paid for POF, my dating fatigue is over....for now.

I've been chatting to someone for a few days, booked a date for the weekend and had a long phone call with him last night. It felt like we were old friends.

First time in a very long time I'm excited about going on a date 😁

Go Nelly!! You got the right app for you.

In my dating I used Hinge and Bumble. Match was absolutely depressing in my opinion. I live in big city too so it was ok with number of dates. I found Hinge was quite good

I agree with Nelly though…this is timing and luck more than anything.

I always get upset when any lady here feels she’s too short or too tall or too skinny or too fat…the reality is that there’s a chap or two perfect for you but he has to be in the right emotional place to meet you and hang out with you with some focus.