Page 34 | Dating Thread 238 - Sex, Beer and Sausage Rolls (for the lucky ones!)

OnceRuralNowUrbanbliss · 2023-01-20T09:57:36+00:00

Hi All welcome to a shiny new thread as we proceed into 2023 with support for those riding the rollercoasters of the world of dating. The Rules: 1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating. 2. Develop a thick skin. 3. Do not invest emotionally too soon. 4. It's all BS until it actually happens. 5. Trust your gut instinct. 6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault. 7. Know your worth. 8. If it's not fun, stop. 9. Loo update is mandatory. 10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy. Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

VanillaSox · 13/02/2023 14:07

Hi all - bored with old username so have changed to this. Had an exhausting weekend -things are moving on with Mr Serb but he has now gone away with his kids for half term so to vicariously enjoy action with all the irons peeps are cultivating on here 😁

Mila14 · 13/02/2023 15:20

Hiya VanillaSox… You are our Jangolina 😊. MrEx has DC part of this week. So doing marvels so we can spend time together really

VanillaSox · 13/02/2023 15:32

@Mila14 you and Mr Ex really are the goods! Give us all hope ❤️

Mila14 · 13/02/2023 15:43

Vanilla … we are going slowly but I’m having a lot of fun. I really don’t believe in absolutely perfect relationships… Even less after 7 years and Covid crisis in the middle. I’m in love and don’t want to date anyone else but… I’m not 100% sure this is the man I want to grow old with. Right now it’s just what I need though

Undecidedandtorn · 13/02/2023 17:12

LuckyLinda3 · 13/02/2023 10:41

Happy monday all, trying to keep up as this thread moves quickly. Our plans for our nights away changed due to a funeral he had to attend in Scotland. He asked me to go too so we ended up away for 4 nights, longest together so far and had lovely chilled time. Lost my wee kitten while away and was devastated and he was so kind. One thing came up though that has thrown me slightly. First night away he confided that he needs a "break" between sessions. We have a great time physically and usually see each other twice a week so this threw me a bit. I am glad that he feels comfortable enough to talk to me but it I feel a bit reluctant now about being physical in any way in case its the wrong time....he is very unselfish so I'm in no way neglected. Am I overthinking this???

Don't they all need a break between to "reload". The older the longer I find.

Iknowacrackingowlsanctuary · 13/02/2023 17:53

LuckyLinda3 · 13/02/2023 10:41

Happy monday all, trying to keep up as this thread moves quickly. Our plans for our nights away changed due to a funeral he had to attend in Scotland. He asked me to go too so we ended up away for 4 nights, longest together so far and had lovely chilled time. Lost my wee kitten while away and was devastated and he was so kind. One thing came up though that has thrown me slightly. First night away he confided that he needs a "break" between sessions. We have a great time physically and usually see each other twice a week so this threw me a bit. I am glad that he feels comfortable enough to talk to me but it I feel a bit reluctant now about being physical in any way in case its the wrong time....he is very unselfish so I'm in no way neglected. Am I overthinking this???

Totally overthinking it. I’m not sure how old he is but MrF is 41 and sometimes needs a break, we often manage a morning session and then a bedtime one. Sometimes we have one ‘session’ and then the next time he just makes it all about me, which I’m very happy to oblige! 😄

Mila14 · 13/02/2023 19:08

@LuckyLinda3 …did you manage to talk to him about his issues…controlling you going with your friends, not apologising, being confrontational in public etc?

MyopicBunny · 13/02/2023 19:09

Just checking I'm not unreasonable about this.

I was talking to a guy and we seemed to get on well. We were going to meet at the weekend but as soon as I mentioned to him I have an adult dd with very high care needs who lives in supported living, he just stopped messaging me. So I blocked him because I'm not going to get involved with someone who acts weird about that.

Then today, he's started messaging me from another phone 'are you ok? Where did you go' etc.

If he can't think of anything to say to me about my life then I may as well bin the situation- that's how I see it.

Garysmum · 13/02/2023 19:09

Odd one for me. Had a great meet on Saturday and swapped numbers with Mr Golf. He said he'd had a great time and we should meet again soon and he was looking forward to meeting again. A few texts then nothing. I must be so boring.
I might try a different site - any recommendations?

Mila14 · 13/02/2023 19:14

MyopicBunny · 13/02/2023 19:09

Just checking I'm not unreasonable about this.

I was talking to a guy and we seemed to get on well. We were going to meet at the weekend but as soon as I mentioned to him I have an adult dd with very high care needs who lives in supported living, he just stopped messaging me. So I blocked him because I'm not going to get involved with someone who acts weird about that.

Then today, he's started messaging me from another phone 'are you ok? Where did you go' etc.

If he can't think of anything to say to me about my life then I may as well bin the situation- that's how I see it.

I think he probably stopped messaging to concentrate on other women. It didn’t work so back to you. Guys who disappear early on are “ busy”. It they always get back if nothing better comes up. Be careful

Mila14 · 13/02/2023 19:16

Garysmum · 13/02/2023 19:09

Odd one for me. Had a great meet on Saturday and swapped numbers with Mr Golf. He said he'd had a great time and we should meet again soon and he was looking forward to meeting again. A few texts then nothing. I must be so boring.
I might try a different site - any recommendations?

As I said previously. At this stage people are multi dating … if there’s a change in comms something is saying to you that you are not first choice

MyopicBunny · 13/02/2023 19:18

Yes that's the problem isn't it but we haven't even met yet. I think if problems start to come up before you even met you might as well just leave it.

Garysmum · 13/02/2023 19:29

@Mila14 true. But I multi date and never change my pattern of communication. I wouldn’t ask for someone’s number if I didn’t intend on meeting up.
To be fair though if people blocked me for having a busy day and not responding within a few hours then I’d be chatting to nobody! But I will block and move on.

MyopicBunny · 13/02/2023 19:33

Omg, a guy messaged me on a dating site the other day. So I looked at his profile and he said on it that he doesn't date women over a size 8. This man is 54, not tall and has lost all his hair(!) what makes these people think they have the right to be rude and demanding about other peoples appearances? I messaged him back that I only date guys who look like Brad Pitt. And therefore assume he scrubs up better in person 😂

Mila14 · 13/02/2023 19:39

Garysmum · 13/02/2023 19:29

@Mila14 true. But I multi date and never change my pattern of communication. I wouldn’t ask for someone’s number if I didn’t intend on meeting up.
To be fair though if people blocked me for having a busy day and not responding within a few hours then I’d be chatting to nobody! But I will block and move on.

Let him come back if you wish… but I think if after the date there’s a change in comms…it’s not the best start…

Mila14 · 13/02/2023 19:41

Garysmum · 13/02/2023 19:29

@Mila14 true. But I multi date and never change my pattern of communication. I wouldn’t ask for someone’s number if I didn’t intend on meeting up.
To be fair though if people blocked me for having a busy day and not responding within a few hours then I’d be chatting to nobody! But I will block and move on.

If he’s not attractive and tall…good luck to him. A guy that writes that in his profile is clearly stupid. We can have preferences but it’s rude to put them out there. 😉

NoDatingForOldMen · 13/02/2023 19:46

LuckyLinda3 · 13/02/2023 10:41

Happy monday all, trying to keep up as this thread moves quickly. Our plans for our nights away changed due to a funeral he had to attend in Scotland. He asked me to go too so we ended up away for 4 nights, longest together so far and had lovely chilled time. Lost my wee kitten while away and was devastated and he was so kind. One thing came up though that has thrown me slightly. First night away he confided that he needs a "break" between sessions. We have a great time physically and usually see each other twice a week so this threw me a bit. I am glad that he feels comfortable enough to talk to me but it I feel a bit reluctant now about being physical in any way in case its the wrong time....he is very unselfish so I'm in no way neglected. Am I overthinking this???

It’s called the Refractory period, ( the time between orgasms ) tends gets longer as men get older, you will know when he ready again as , well it will be obvious really

MyopicBunny · 13/02/2023 19:54

@Mila14 yep, I stand by my belief that a sizeable number of guys out there think they are entitled to a 25 year old, rich supermodel.

LuckyLinda3 · 13/02/2023 20:02

Thanks all for your replies, I think you may have mixed me up @Mila14!. Hes early fifties and I suppose we have never spent 4 nights together before either. I'll just see how it goes and am glad of the responses. To be fair we were away for a funeral too.

Eeksteek · 13/02/2023 20:10

Mmm. Makes you wonder how it’s going for them!

Anyone doing anything Valentinesey? Dating and Valentines is a bit of a minefield. MrPottery is coming here, so will be getting no sex, but beer, steak and sausage rolls which ought to go down well, even if I’m not. I might do him a handmade card if I get time tomorrow. He is in the ‘it’s-all-commercial-crap’ camp. But he does like handmade stuff. I have mentioned tulips, as they are my favourite anyway, but he bought goodies for both us last time he came over, so it’s unlikely he’ll turn up with nothing. And he picked things I’d said we especially liked, which was thoughtful and attentive. I was impressed.

I like Valentine’s Day, because for me it’s the start of spring, and I have a little girl and a pink heart holiday is about as good as it gets for them, up until about age ten, anyway.

Mila14 · 13/02/2023 21:07

LuckyLinda3 · 13/02/2023 20:02

Thanks all for your replies, I think you may have mixed me up @Mila14!. Hes early fifties and I suppose we have never spent 4 nights together before either. I'll just see how it goes and am glad of the responses. To be fair we were away for a funeral too.

Oh sorry lovely… I confused you!!! Enjoy your time with Mr ?… I confused him with Mr Cherry!

Mila14 · 13/02/2023 21:11

Eeksteek · 13/02/2023 20:10

Mmm. Makes you wonder how it’s going for them!

Anyone doing anything Valentinesey? Dating and Valentines is a bit of a minefield. MrPottery is coming here, so will be getting no sex, but beer, steak and sausage rolls which ought to go down well, even if I’m not. I might do him a handmade card if I get time tomorrow. He is in the ‘it’s-all-commercial-crap’ camp. But he does like handmade stuff. I have mentioned tulips, as they are my favourite anyway, but he bought goodies for both us last time he came over, so it’s unlikely he’ll turn up with nothing. And he picked things I’d said we especially liked, which was thoughtful and attentive. I was impressed.

I like Valentine’s Day, because for me it’s the start of spring, and I have a little girl and a pink heart holiday is about as good as it gets for them, up until about age ten, anyway.

I got roses and card already…🙄… we will do posh lunch place…he’s the resto man so O am sure he will pick somewhere lovely. We decided not to go out for dinner because it will be a lot more crowded. Lunch is good 👍🏻. I will go to gym early morning to burn some…I love Valentine’s and not always have we had the chance to enjoy it (kids or school hols…). So yeah…❤️

Definitelycross · 13/02/2023 21:24

MyopicBunny · 13/02/2023 19:09

Just checking I'm not unreasonable about this.

I was talking to a guy and we seemed to get on well. We were going to meet at the weekend but as soon as I mentioned to him I have an adult dd with very high care needs who lives in supported living, he just stopped messaging me. So I blocked him because I'm not going to get involved with someone who acts weird about that.

Then today, he's started messaging me from another phone 'are you ok? Where did you go' etc.

If he can't think of anything to say to me about my life then I may as well bin the situation- that's how I see it.

I would be very suspicious about this. I would definitely think he's hedging his bets but also I find it very weird he's messaging you from a different phone. Why?

But if you're not feeling it don't feel pressurised by him into going any further on the journey.

Definitelycross · 13/02/2023 21:28

Well my POF weirdo story

Started messaging nice and normally. Then said I looked like a relative and I said god I hope not as that would be weird. We then got to the fact that long lost siblings often fancy each other. He then said that if he found he was related to me he would still date me. Then loads of incest talk - half jokey, then I woke up to being told that he wanted to put his 10 inches in.

How lovely!

And they say romance is dead.

BUT
Mr #9, first date is tomorrow, I said how do you feel about it being valentines' day? His reply? "Will you be my valentine?" and then "I think its a great date for a first meet" still no icky sexual notions either. But we will see.........

Mila14 · 13/02/2023 21:57

Definitelycross · 13/02/2023 21:28

Well my POF weirdo story

Started messaging nice and normally. Then said I looked like a relative and I said god I hope not as that would be weird. We then got to the fact that long lost siblings often fancy each other. He then said that if he found he was related to me he would still date me. Then loads of incest talk - half jokey, then I woke up to being told that he wanted to put his 10 inches in.

How lovely!

And they say romance is dead.

BUT
Mr #9, first date is tomorrow, I said how do you feel about it being valentines' day? His reply? "Will you be my valentine?" and then "I think its a great date for a first meet" still no icky sexual notions either. But we will see.........

Good lord Deffy…the POF guy…massive weirdo. Mr 9 sounds just normal. Normal is good 👍🏻