Oh my, I'm so behind. Let's remember to blame the actual guilty parties, and not each other, here. I hope those of us who are hurt are doing OK. I genuinely would not have been able to do this at all without the support of this thread.
Re: pubic hair, I'm pleased to see my cleaner is wrong, and we aren't all bald! IDC what anyone else does, and I'm not changing what I do, I was just curious about what she considers normal nowadays, and I don't. MrPottery prefers me with some, and I definitely CBA taking it all off, so everyone's happy, here. I don't think it's related to the thrush either. I've had pubic hair for thirty odd years, and never had thrush before! Hair removal is somewhat on my mind, as I treated myself to a laser, which a huge faff, but a once-and-done thing, so I'm doing it properly. I think the thrush is hormonal, as it coincides with my insane libido. And frankly, if it's a side effect, I'll take it. I've got additional Fluco-whatsit from the docs, and I'm to take it weekly for six weeks, as I don't think it's been clearing either. It has now, though and I'm back in the saddle and loving it. MrPottery says he can't understand what he was thinking at 18 and he should have been getting together with women in their forties in his teens and twenties!
He also waxes lyrical about my body. Like, delights in it. It's not bad, and I'm not insecure about it, but I absolutely don't see it like he does! I see someone who likes cheesecake a bit too much, could lose a stone one of these days, and definitely has a few battlescars from the childbirth wars and some dresses that no longer fit! He doesn't see that at all (and tells me so at length!). I think he's so busy oogling the bounty above and below, he doesn't even notice the middle! I only notice the middle, the rest of being fit for purpose (which is to look OK in clothes!) It's very refreshing. So, Oncey (and anyone else feeling a bit self conscious!) knock yourself out. (Admittedly, I was so frustrated after that business with Pug and all those vanilla first dates I did rather throw myself at him, which probably concentrated his mind somewhat! But even then it goes to show that it's what you do, not what you've got, that matters here). He's also very tactile and quite handsy, which I love (although when my ex was it drove me insane!)
I'm over pussy-footing about. Guys who I want will know. They all know why we're on Tinder to a greater or lesser degree, and it's not to make friends. If they want less, well, they can always go and find less. It's how I am in the whole rest of my life, and dating will henceforth be no different.
If they aren't ready for me as I am (Pug!) well, that's not my problem and we can all find out sooner and get to where we want to be.
That said, I think I am now In A Relationship. We're both agreed we're exclusive, I've met his mother (via FaceTime, but hey, she lives in Canada) and we are making plans for 'the summer'. Whatever you call it, that's A Thing! He's pretty chilled and open and we both talk a lot about what a great time we are having together. (I'm not calling it anything, I'm just happy with it). He hasn't met my kid yet, but only because I prefer to go his place so I can, ahem, not worry about her and be myself. It doesn't feel like he's my forever-person, but I'm really happy with things as they are. I don't actually want a forever-person. Apart from him living slightly further away than I'd like. Can't be helped though.
I HATE the term 'boyfriend' though. It's so infantile. I'm not 14, and MrPottery is no boy. 'Lover' sounds rather casual and extra-martital. 'Partner' is a bit much. 'Date' doesn't cover it either. So far I have been describing him to friends as 'my new man' and segue-waying into 'the man in my life' but it's not very snappy! He calls me 'my Girl' and frankly the way he says he can keep on doing it (he specifically does it because of how much I like how it comes out in his accent!)