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Original poster

Should I message?

384 replies

AbiVenete · 03/01/2023 10:21

Years ago, while backpacking, I met a man who I instantly clicked with and we had a whirlwind 7 days of the most amazing sex I have ever had. We both had separate flights and we agreed to meet back in UK. He wrote his name and number in a book (this predates mobiles and Facebook) which I then lost.

A few weeks ago, while reading the news online, I instantly recognised his face, name the same… he has just taken a high profile job in my region. I immediately felt that tinge of excitement, looked him up, he’s on LinkedIn but nothing obvious anywhere else so no idea if he’s single or anything.

Am I being ridiculous to think about messaging? He probably a) wont remember me b) is married or unavailable. I am single again and keep drafting messages but unsure exactly what to say. Should I message or just leave it in the past?

OP posts:
Elfidela1980 · 04/01/2023 00:19

Go on go on go on go on

(let’s read the draft!!!!)

to be serious tho seeing as you don’t socialise with him anyway, what’s the worst that can happen if you send a short breezy ‘I don’t know if you’ll remember me’ type message. Definitely tell him your bag was stolen and it was a nice surprise when he popped up on your linkedin. Personally, I’d also give him a clear opening - cos men - and tell him it made you smile remembering your wild week in Wherever and that you’re glad he’s flourishing in his career.

Some people saying he’s probably hitched, but if he isn’t interested in re-visiting then what have you lost? Also, it would be a nice thing to do for him too (he might be pleased to know he hadn’t been deliberately dingyed even if it was twenty years ago!)

do it!

buttermut · 04/01/2023 00:21

Livelovebehappy · 03/01/2023 23:42

If he’s attractive, he may have had literally dozens of flings during his early years. To think that now, years later, he would remember one person out of many, would be really unlikely tbh.

Rude and unnecessary.

CandidClarisse · 04/01/2023 00:29

Following! If he replies be sure to mention that the bag with his details in got stolen! As that's quite significant, he might have been thinking for a short time afterwards that you were not interested.

Good luck 🤞

BakersYeast · 04/01/2023 00:33

VisaGeezer · 03/01/2023 10:34

Maybe 192 people or something, I think it uses the electoral role. You'll see who's living at the same address during electoral roll polls.

Not if they have opted out as many people do.

longcoffeebreak · 04/01/2023 00:41

Ooh exciting

Annabananna1 · 04/01/2023 00:49

Hope you get a response

Gettingnowherefast · 04/01/2023 01:35

Good luck

WGACA · 04/01/2023 01:43

I would message (and if he replies follow it up with you were the best sex I’ve ever had 😜)

ItsaPeppaPink · 04/01/2023 01:48

baileys6904 · 03/01/2023 10:51

What will you regret most, trying and not getting a positive outcome, or not trying at all and never knowing?

I know which I'd go for...

This!!! Do it!

mackthepony · 04/01/2023 01:52

Good luck op. If it was me I would totally message him!

Ignore the negative comments on here 😶😒

Songbird54321 · 04/01/2023 02:08

I have nothing to add I just want to be notified of any update Grin

JadeandGreen · 04/01/2023 02:18

Songbird54321 · 04/01/2023 02:08

I have nothing to add I just want to be notified of any update Grin

Same! 😆

stevalnamechanger · 04/01/2023 02:43

Do it !!!

OldFan · 04/01/2023 02:49

'Hello there, how're things with you? Sorry to contact you on LinkedIn. I've often wondered how you were doing. My bag was stolen and with it my notebook with your number in it, or I would definitely have kept in touch. I live in X and happened to see you mentioned in the paper. How're you finding your new job?'

OldFan · 04/01/2023 02:51

Ooh I see you messaged. Hope you get a good update:)

caramellandscape · 04/01/2023 03:03

This is all so exciting and lovely!!!

I would've messaged him on Linkedin with a professional pretext, saying "so nice to see you again" and commenting on our different / overlapping industries etc. Seeing as you're in a senior role yourself I feel like that's probably what you've done!!

The reason is that someone in a highly visible / senior role, who uses Linkedin actively for professional networking and who has taken pains to keep their personal (FB etc) profile low, might be alarmed to receive a sudden message with just a sexual/romantic subtext from 20 years ago. Especially if they're already married / attached and want to avoid any public controversy.

OdeToBillyJoe · 04/01/2023 03:54

Just drop him a casual email saying something like:

"what a small world but I've just seen your picture .... I don't know if you remember me .... hope you're doing well ...."

He can then chose to respond or not!

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 04/01/2023 04:51

Good luck! 🍀

Bepis · 04/01/2023 04:55

Noooooo I got to the end of the thread on the edge of my seat wanting an update as to whether he had replied or not. The suspense! 😂

I'm way too invested.

Thisisworsethananticpated · 04/01/2023 07:19

Go for it
you never know !
but assume there is a .5% chance this will result in anything given life etc

Original poster
AbiVenete · 04/01/2023 08:04

I went to bed last night having had no reply but woke up this morning to a nice message, essentially saying it was nice to hear from me again and he’d often wondered what happened to me. Friendly but professional is how I’d describe the tone. I’ve replied again

OP posts:
EBearhug · 04/01/2023 08:07

Probably best not to mention half MN is on tenterhooks for his next reply!

ridiculoso82 · 04/01/2023 08:08

AbiVenete · 04/01/2023 08:04

I went to bed last night having had no reply but woke up this morning to a nice message, essentially saying it was nice to hear from me again and he’d often wondered what happened to me. Friendly but professional is how I’d describe the tone. I’ve replied again

Did he ask any questions?

Alaldlccmemsjzja · 04/01/2023 08:09

No, you shouldn’t. It would be weird.

Alaldlccmemsjzja · 04/01/2023 08:09

Sorry I didn’t read the thread please ignore me!

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