Is there something going on with me and a friends husband?

[CyprusLiving]

So, I am married. A very close friend of mine is married. We all have lots of social meet ups with just us 4, and with other friends too.

When we are sober, me and friends husband don't speak much at all, when we do it is immensly awkward and always about the kids as we don't know what else to say.

When we drink alcohol it is completley different. Always making fun of eachother and having great banter. I have noticed we are keeping eye contact longer than usual now. He would always put an arm around our other friends, even when around their husbands (this is usual of all of our husbands, we are all really close and laid back about this). He never once put his arm around me, never had any touching.

BUT.

The day before christmas eve, me, my friend and the husband in question went to the pub (we live on a military base so knew most of the people there). I got upset at something unrelated and walked off and he followed and we had a deep chat. The rest of the night was weird, he worked behind the bar for a bit and didn't let me buy a drink, eye contact was insane. I'd be dancing and he would be looking over even though his wife was in a different direction. He put his arm around me, then I noticed we would be stood arm in arm regularly, he seemed to be pulling me closely towards him. He waked past me and brushed my hip with his hand, would hold my hand to take me to the dance floor through the crowd. He kissed my forehead when hugging me goodbye.
But also throughout the night he would be kissing his wife in front of me.
I made a joke about my husband being lucky to have me on his quiz team as he won, and the man in question replied "he's lucky in many ways".

Then yesterday (christmas day), I went to their house for evening drinks. Again the eye contact and banter was huge. I walked in with another of our friends. He hugged me, again kissed my head, then hugged my friend but no kiss (I noticed he kissed my head and wanted to see if it was just what he does to everyone or just me?)

Basically I have no idea if he is flirting with me or just being friendly, and confused why we don't speak when sober.
I do find him attractive, and if i'm being fully honest, I most likely do flirt with him when drunk.

I'm spending new years eve with them also, and our friends and my husband and I just want to know whats going on.

I’m sure that bit of attention you’re getting feels nice and confidence boosting at the moment but it will absolutely feel the complete opposite if you let this go any further. And if he doesn’t speak to you now when you're sober, he certainly won’t if you let him sleep with you. Steer well clear.

You're playing so dumb. It's not a great look.

But I hope your friend sees this. And your husband.

Wow. I can understand why you haven’t responded OP. 🙄If this is serious, then you really need to give your head good wobble. What you have written is basically that you flirt outrageously with your friends husband, in front of her, and he flirts outrageously with you. You enjoy it. Do you have any moral standards at all?

Do you want to have an affair with this man?

Is this the Top Gun 3 script?

Nasty

I don't have anything new to say except for what has been said already, but this is all going to end in disaster if you don't cut this out now.

I am going to assume you are feeling a bit bored and need of an ego boost or excitement. Your friend's husband has shown you some interest so you've got all caught up in this new and 'exciting' male interest... I am not excusing your behaviour and apparent indifference to your friend in all this, but just saying I understand the feeling bored part and enjoying feeling wanted again, even if I can't understand why you'd even entertain it given who it is as that is all kinds of wrong.

The fact all this seems to only happen when you are drunk makes me think this is nothing more than an ego boost for your friend's husband. He wants to see if he has still 'got it', or maybe he is prepared to take it further and sleep with you. In which case, sorry but I think it'd be a case of him getting what he wants and then back to normal as he only wanted sex. He would go back to his wife acting normal, leaving you to do the same , knowing what you've done.

How would you feel if this was your friend and your husband? Puts a different spin on it doesn't it... Keep well away, and don't even look at your friend's husband as much as you can.

I won’t repeat the bits about you doing something really shitty because it has all been said already, but what exactly do you think is going to be the best case scenario here? Do you think you’re the first? That you are the only woman who has ever tempted him to break his marriage vows? Do you think you and this poor woman’s husband are going to go skipping off into the sunset together?

Or maybe you’d be happy with an illicit affair? Something totally secret, and exciting and romantic that gets you through the drudgery of being just someone’s wife or someone’s mum? You are insane if you think nobody has noticed the lingering looks and forehead kisses and that rumours aren’t already stirring. And if you think that it would be anything more than a couple of sordid bunk ups in a car before he started to ghost you then you’re delusional. What is wrong with your self esteem that you are willing to let yourself be used in this way? How cruel are you that you’re willing to put your husband and your friend through the worst sort of betrayal? That you’d let your children be teased at school for having a home wrecker as a mum? Because you know it’s always the woman who gets the blame. Where will you live when you’re moved off the base because of this? Remember how lonely you were before you made friends? Even if your husband forgave you, nobody else would give you the time of day, except other unfaithful husbands who have heard the gossip that you’re willing to cheat.

I didn’t read your previous post but you’re really teetering on the edge of disaster here. If you don’t stop this now, your life is going to start falling down around your ears. You’re playing with fire and nothing good is going to come from this.

Biffa bins 🤣🤣🤣🤣

You do know he's going grab the microphone on NYE to declare undying love for you, don't you?

Then he'll wade into the crowd, sweep you up in his strong, manly arms and take you away .....

..... to the back alley where you can give his a 'loving' blow-job before he returns to the party leaving you kneeling there like the deluded, self-centred fuckwit you are.

You know this, right?

Priceless 🤣🤣🤣

This. Will be a skanky and tawdry shag, no the fireworks you are hoping for.

Million bucks he’s done this before….

This is how I see it. OP wishes something was going on with her “friend’s” (hardly a friend is she?) husband hence the reason she’s posted about it on here. The responses would have scared her off and hopefully drummed some sense into her.

The Biffa bins comment is hilarious

But also completely accurate.

This is no fairytale in the making. It’s giving… Take a Break magazine.

Sure, whatever you need to believe.

I love this so Jane Austen in 21st Century vibe. You two are just meant to be. The universe demands your connection. Namaste.

@Netrandom 🤣🤣🤣💪💪💪🧘🏻‍♀️🧘🏻‍♀️🧘🏻‍♀️

the eye contact was insane

Google eyes everywhere!!!

I meant googly but autocorrect doesn't want to let me be great.

If you really want to be ostracised by every other military wife on Cyprus, carry on as you are @CyprusLiving. Otherwise just cut it out and avoid him like the plague. His mates will tell him he’s a hell of a lad. Their wives will take a very different view and your life will be a misery.

😂😂😂😂😂

Takes two to make eye contact, OP.

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

I worked at the Infantry Training Centre where basic training took place for all Infantry soldiers - that is exactly what they do with "basic soldiers" - after all, SF start somewhere.