Man I'm seeing has 3 children with 3 different mothers. Red flag?

[tinderexplorer]

I have been on 2 dates with this man. He is 36. He has dropped a bit of a bombshell and I am not sure how to proceed. He has 3 DCs with 3 women. He said he has good relationships with each DC and loves them. They are 12, 10 and 6. I did not press him about why the relationships he had with the DCs mums didn't work out. I am now wondering what has gone on with his prior relationships. I also wonder if the DCs were planned or not. I thought there was potential after the first date but not I am not sure. It's put me off him a bit honestly.

HUGE red flag!

Why would you want to be with a man who has 3 children with 3 different women? If 3 women didnt want him, why would you.

I saw this the other day and I cannot stop laughing about it.

It’s especially funny when you remember that their last name is ‘Cannon’.

Legendary Love Cannon.

I’m going to be different from everyone else and encourage you to give him a chance and find out what went wrong before cutting him off.
My friend has 3 dc with 3 different women. The first was born was he was young and dumb- he admits that. The second was born during a happy relationship but the mum later cheated. The third was born when he was engaged to the mum but the relationship sadly fell apart. He is a very responsible father, he has the children 50/50 each week. He attends all school related things and is even leads 2 of their sports clubs. He works hard to provide everything they need. He barely gets a second date because the moment he tells a woman they run a mile without knowing the facts.
Now the guy you’re dating might not care for his children but don’t tarnish all single dads that way. This guy might actually be a good, full on dad.

Sounds like he enjoys all the fun stuff, no sense of responsibility and when the going gets tough, as with young children, he fucks off onto the next adventure (like you?)

I'm sure the Pied Piper of Procreation did show potential on the first date - he didn't fool impregnate three women just by chance.

But he also left three women very soon afterwards. So use your head.

Why do you even talk to him?

Pied Piper of Procreation

🤣🤣🤣

Apart from Monroe, Cannon’s kids have stupid names.

I'm sure he seems very plausible but he's what I call "circulating trash".

There are reasons he's not had three consecutive relationships with women he had a child with work out, and those reasons are not likely to have been resolved.

Besides, if you haven't had kids yet, your kids with get one quarter of the resources from his end that they would've got with a Dad with who you both had your first child.

*with whom

Do you want children? If so I don't think he's right. If not, then you can see how it goes.

He's low quality mate material.

It's a moot point, Kate is now late 40s and most likely cant have any more children. But still if she was younger I would advise any men I knew that wanted to date her to take care and look here are the red flags.

Men however can conceive children until much later in life, and the more children they have to different women makes it (as a pp put it) a circus to contend with.

No problems producing offspring, but not so keen on sticking around afterwards is what the evidence suggests. When the fun stops, he's off.

Red flag aside (and it's a big one)
He has a huge amount of commitment (financially, emotionally and on his time) in his life already, and will continue to do so for many many years, which would be a dealbreaker for me.

A woman I know had 2 kids with a man like this.

He had two kids with two women and a third on the way when she get pregnant by him (and she went on to have another whim she admits he was opposed to (he thought she was on contraception).

She now has his kids four and five (her being the fourth mother).

He has not seen them since babies.

He has not voluntarily paid for them.

He made arrangements to send them once, she prepped the kids, he cancelled.

She gets a smidgeon of child maintenance.

The kids are visibly "interested" in other kids Dads and ask about them. They seem aware of their circumstances.

It would be a deal-breaker for me with a man or a woman.

Plus the claims that this would be different if it were a woman are all bollocks anyway.

The only thing that might make it different in Kate's situation, if it was, is her money. I still wouldn't be up for that level of baggage, but most people aren't rich enough to be able to ignore the financial support or potential financial support of several existing children when considering whether to make a life with someone. People in Kate Winslet's circles are probably amongst the few exceptions.

No matter how fantastic he is , it would be a hard no from me. If only trying to sort out the logistics of 3 other families. This alone would be a nightmare whether he us on good term with his exes or not.

Kate Winslet has four children

Kate Winslet is incredibly rich.

And if Ned is one of the fathers, he is also incredibly rich. His family own Caribbean islands, fly in private jets.

Yes, there's still the emotional etc issues of complicated blended families but .....They do not have the practical concerns of ordinary mortals.

How many red flags does it take? Blimey.

I wished my nieces mum had taken heed of the red flags with her STBexH who came to the relationship with 4 kids from 3 women.

She married him and had two kids with him;they were married a grand total of 5.5 years;he started an affair whilst she was pregnant with her youngest and found herself a single mum of 3 when the resulting baby of that pregnancy was 2 weeks old.

15 months her ex is engaged to his AP and they have a 4 month old baby.

7 kids by 5 women and only 11 months between the youngest two by different mothers......

Do you want to be his 4th Baby Mama?

I'm also amazed you need to ask. As PPs have said, close together, with relationships ending soon after. Big red flags.

Even if he's dad of the year, seeing them all for quality time, doing his fair share of the work and paying proper maintenance, it's a strange lifestyle choice. Plus there are three exes in the picture forever.

*That should say 15 months later

And to add he's gotten engaged and has another kid before the divorce has even been finalised.