Who pays for the window broken by snowball?

[Toloveandtowork]

Wondering if anyone can offer advice.

My son, 11, and his friend, also 11, were out playing in the snow a few days ago. They threw snowballs at a neighbours window and my son's friend broke a window pane.
Cost £125 for repair.

The friend's mother paid for it, and knocked on my door today and asked for half the money. This was the first I heard about this incident as my son didn't tell me.

I spoke to her son earlier and he said it was him that broke the window.

There is ring doorbell evidence of the boys walking past and the sound of smashing glass.

Should I pay?

If I had plenty of money, I'd rather pay and keep the peace. However, I'm going through a very though time financially and don't even have enough for Christmas. Nothing bought yet and an unexpected £60 is not what I need now.

Supervising 11 year olds playing out? Really?

Why do you ask? What a strange question.

Do you think two secondary school boys out walking should be supervised?

It could have been either of them that threw the exact snowball and either of them could have suggested doing it.

Pay the bill 50/50

Why do people try to do gotchas like this? You know from OP's first post that they weren't supervised so I presume you've asked just so you can say the parents are awful for letting their kids be unsupervised.

They're 11 and were playing outside together which is perfectly normal.

If there was an adult supervising them, they would have told them not to throw stuff at people's windows. Obviously.

Kids do stupid and naughty stuff. That's real life. There are consequences and OP is figuring out what they'll be rather than saying her son is a perfect angel, which is refreshing!

@monsteramunch Thanks for the kind words.
I have been astonished and dismayed to notice that there are lots of people on here who automatically lay into mothers, make assumptions based on projection and are generally cruel when there is no need for it. Of course, plenty of others gave the straight answers I was looking for which has been helpful.
Merry Christmas

Yes, that's why liability is already covered by law.

This is what insurance is for, because you can't demand money every time a child smashes something.

In a slightly different scenario, you son would be persecuted under joint enterprise, thus, you should pay up.

"This is what insurance is for, because you can't demand money every time a child smashes something."

I disagree. You can absolutely ask someone to pay for damage done to your property, especially damage done due to anti social behaviour. The person who's window was broken shouldn't have to go to their insurance and end up paying higher premiums going forward.

I wouldn't pay. Her son broke it, he is responsible then she pays.

If my son broke a window I would pay. I wouldn't dream of asking other parents to contribute. For all you know your child may have been careful and the other child not.

They're both responsible. You don't know if your sons snowball actually cracked the window so the next one shattered it. And, anyway, they were involved in a joint enterprise.

Children that have thrown rocks on cars going under bridges have been held to be equally responsible for a rock that killed the driver, despite not being the individual that actually threw it.

Of course you can ask. But you can't rely on it as a method of payment. If your window is broken and no one offers to pay for it, you don't really have any option other than to replace it.

Yeah, a 11yo throws his snowball with a gentle lob with the intention of it gracefully skimming the window.
Honestly, the explanations people come up with to excuse childrens bad behaviour.

Carefully throwing snowballs at the neighbours window? 👍🏻

It is how the law works, joint enterprise. OP should pay up.

I would pay it and my son would be taking on extra chores to repay the cost. It’s a valuable lesson in not getting caught up with a friends “fun” and collective responsibility. At 11 he’s old enough not to be throwing snowballs at peoples houses and whether he threw the actual snowball that caused the damage it was reasonable to expect a window might get broken if they both are throwing snowballs at houses.

I do think I'd pay up and make your son work it off by doing chores. It's a good life lesson for him that throwing things at property may cause damage and therefore has consequences. Frankly it's only by luck and not management that it was your son's friend who broke the window, and not him personally, anyway.

Agree with Tigger. Why on earth should the homeowner be inconvenienced, scared and have to suffer increased premiums through no fault of her own? This isn't a burst pipe or similar, which is an accident; this could easily have been avoided if the kids hasn't thrown snowballs. Action and result. There are consequences.

"Of course you can ask. But you can't rely on it as a method of payment. If your window is broken and no one offers to pay for it, you don't really have any option other than to replace it."

I agree you can't rely on it. And some parents will go out if their way not to pay. But for me that's a sad state of affairs. We had our door broken by kids (well teenagers) who thought it would be hilarious to come bang on our door at 11pm one night. We were all in bed and got the biggest fright.

Unfortunately for them, they hit the door so hard the glass spidered. We don't own our home and were told we either paid for the damage or report it to the police and get a incident number. So it was reported to the police. If the parents had paid for the damage that would have been the end of it. But instead, it turned out to be one incident in a long line of ongoing antisocial behaviour which resulted in police action.

And with more and more people getting video doorbells there is more chance of proof of who was involved.

100% this.

Both throwing snowballs at the window, your son was equally in the wrong OP. It was pure chance he didn’t throw the actual snowball that did made the break.

I broke a Neighbours window once (I was hitting tiny stones with a tennis racket and one bounced off the road and up into the window). It was freakish. Couldn’t believe it, I recall running inside and SuperGran was on. 😂 I can’t remember what was paid (it was around 1988 so I would have been 8).

Yes, and if you read the supreme courts rulings you would see how the threshold has been eroded to actuly facilitate miscarriages of justice. It's not being there, it is actively facilitating and encouraging the crime and the test was only meant for serious crimes. Broken windows it wasn't.

@ClareBlue

I think I actually pointed out that some people didn't understand that joint enterprise exists and it's something to teach your children

But thank you for your patronising and smug approach

If you have a point to prove perhaps lay off the superior approach

😆 yeah it’s bollocks

I was “carefully” hitting small stones with a tennis racket. I wasn’t even aiming at any window. One stone bounced along a road (akin to a pebble skimming across water) and up into the Neighbours window. Completely accidental, but I was still culpable.

It would depend on how I was asked I think

Had a very similar situation with mine and we split the cost even though it was hot mate. I would pay, get a refund on one or two Xmas presents and teach him a lesson.