Can we have a thread about ways in which your partner initiates sexual intercourse?

[FrannyandZooey]

Do they use certain words or phrases? Or is it more of an action thing?

and is it just mine who tries to think up comedy ones?

[carmenelectra]

DrN
Im seriously worried now that we are having relationships with the same man!

Well, i was so worried, until i saw a pic of him on your profile!1 Its put my mind at restthat they are different men.

[lucyellensmum]

mine lies on the sofa, waggles his half erect willy around in his hand and says, do you want to suck this? erm..........well, actually, funnily enough..........NO

[DrNortherner]

This thread is making me PMSL.

Where are all the women married to the men who pour champers/dim the lights/scatter rose petals and play Barry White whilst whispering sweet nothings?

[fullmoonfiend]

hah! Just been reminded of all the Sid The Sexist come-ons in Viz...

''D'ya like jewellery pet? Well suck on this, it's a real gem..''

[Wilkie]

Lucyellen - then tiy get a bit nearer, peering intently at his cock and there it is....a piece of underwear fluff stuck on the end

YUMMY!

[carmenelectra]

Yeah i get the "Do you want to suck this?" line as well or even, "You know you want it!"

[Twiglett]

last time I got neck nuzzling

[fullmoonfiend]

'd'ya like birds? Well suck on this, it's really fowl.. etc etc''

[SpawnChorus]

DH looks pointedly at his groin while waggling his eyebrows. It's probably how Mr Bean would initiate coitus.

[OverMyDeadBody]

ROFL.

I'd do anything for a shag right now so probably on the wrong thread...

[ZippiBabes]

actually this was the nearest i got tonight

is this email sex?

"pretty unlikely you'd see gravitons at that energy. but hey, what do i know?
i expect you to be dressed up as a sexy builder next time i see you now ;-)"

he is so much nicer

[fullmoonfiend]

sexy builder? Now there's an oxymoron...

[BitTiredNow]

Mine puts SO much forethought into it - struts in naked with a sheepish grin. Am actively encouraging children to come into bed with me to avoid it........ call me old fashioned, but desperation is seriously unerotic............

[PussinJimmyChoos]

pmsl at this thread!

[cluelessnchaos]

dh says either, fancy some fucky fucky


or

ahh I have a special balm for that

[laughalot]

Why dont you get down on this bad boy !!!
How about f**K OFF

[ZippiBabes]

i find the juxtaposition of long incomprehensible science bit and sex irrisistable (how the fuck u spell that)

[DrNortherner]

Whilst rutting me from behind, if I try to wriggle away he says in a Cliff from Dallas type voice 'Don't fight it, it's bigger than the noth of us'

Then I PMSL.

[Wilkie]

Clueless - ahhh yes, DH also says 'You want fucky fucky? I do it for ten dalla...'

[carmenelectra]

Oh DrN. He is worse than my dp!!!

[Neney1]

Just accidently let out a snort while laughing, not attractive!!

PMSL at the doorway guy... I remember a programme called "50 ways to look good naked" and one of the red hot tips for guys was to stand in a doorway with the light behind you as its supposed to make you look sexier
I caught my DH trying out this move once and he was mortified that I rumbled him!!!

Nowadays, not so much thought goes into it!! I either get dry humped, or the willy windmill... classic moves.

[DrNortherner]

He defusses most of it.Bit like a boyzillian.

[carmenelectra]

Yeah and mine defuzzes most of it. Not all of the time, but sometimes he goes for it, TRims it nice n neat!