Can we have a thread about ways in which your partner initiates sexual intercourse?

[FrannyandZooey]

Do they use certain words or phrases? Or is it more of an action thing?

and is it just mine who tries to think up comedy ones?

[suzywong]

Thank you Ricky Ponting

[TheBestMum]

My dh romantically suggests we have 'a lie down',then pokes his tongue into his cheek & raises his eye-brows a few times suggestively.
A lie-down is certainly something I'm in need of, but usually not the kind he's thinking of.

[loopylou6]

if hes feeling romantic, then he suggests going to bed early and 'playing cards' otherwise he grabs me from behind and starts humping me when im bending over picking summit up or whatever and says summit along the lines of 'oooo dirty bird your gonna get it'

[Mymeems]

Grumpygirl, that would make sense..only he wasn't born until the 80s so that may have passed him by! Maybe he's a bit retro... Quite often he 'clacks' when he comes home from football...maybe it's celebratory, and a bit of peacock (!) style preening

[milfAKAmonkeymonkeymoomoo]

this is the funniest thread I have seen for ages

As for my DH well I get 'Jack Russelled' usually when I'm cooking or told that 'I'm going to do you tonight' or the erection in the back in bed, he makes a few jabbing movements to see whether I'm up for it.

[BitTiredNow]

My bezzer's husband does the ironing when he wants a bit of duvet wrestling - she rang me in despair one night and said' oh bloody hell, he's just asked if there's anything else in the tumble dryer, which means he's desperate and I'm exhausted!!'

[Scootergrrrl]

[mintchips]

Pmsl fabulous thread!

Dp is a regular 'jack Russeller' and willy windmiller! And also believes his 'special medicine' cures all manners of ailments, especially sore throats

I get told I'm going to have "the granny banger out of me" WTF?? and if I'm really lucky he'll clean his teeth

[mintchips]

banged

[JaneHH]

I am LOVING this thread PMSL

One downside: at work today I had trouble keeping a straight face all day. 9 o'clock meeting with my (male) boss. All I could think of was the fact that Willy Windmill seems to be very popular in households across the land, so chances are that my boss also does it. Not an image I really like to think about... [vomit]

[BitTiredNow]

• ace news - but fancy catching me on a sex thread - who'd a thought it..... Is this so you can be closer to the beardy professional one?

[carmenelectra]

Loving Hunkers "DO YOU FANCY A FUCK?" Hilarious.

Just told dp, he likes it a lot. Im worried he will nick the idea

[serin]

He says "you're not going on that bloody mumsnet tonight are you"?

or "We still haven't christened the kids trampoline"

or he starts doing his Elvis impessions...
A little less conversation a little more action.....naked.

God love him.

[Nymphadora]

Told bf about this thread and he is actually scared by all the 'willy windmills' around the country!

He also said it would be nice if he was given the chance to come on to me and told me to ask this

[carmenelectra]

Serin, me too with the mumsnet comment

[serin]

OMG

He asked what I was laughing at and said "Willy Windmill, I can do that!!"
Has gone off to practice!

[stuffitall]

suzy what's this word that's ruder than fuck?
if you've read this thread you know that the stuffits will never be known for their knowledge of the further reaches of sexual invention and exploration so I need it to be spelt out

willy windmills are so popular I wonder why they've never popped up (hur hur) in our house

[fullmoonfiend]

well dh is currently taking advantage of the cold weather by offering to ''keep things warm'' for me....every five minutes it's ''shall I warm those up for you...??''

[cariboo]

It's been so long since we had sex that i've forgotten what initiates it but thanks for the thread: laughing so much it hurts.

[NatalieJane]

I can't help thinking that some of you need these to help your poor soul from your DH's

[stuffitall]

yes my inarticulate dh would love that
all he has to do is turn his pillow over and lie back and wait.. and as if by magic it removes the need even for leg twitching

[scattercushion]

my DH leans over me in bed, pretending to reach for something on the bedside table, thus draping his tackle over my face.

Subtle, eh?

[BalloonSlayer]

Thank you for ressurecting this thread, scattercushion.

I never read it the first time and have PMSL.

Thanks to you my poor DCs christmas presents aren't wrapped up .

My ex used to do with willy waggling, have not missed it. DH has his own tricks...

Perhaps households could generate their own electricity from these sex-starved men. Willy-wind-farms?

[BlueSapphire77]

SC... omg i did laugh at your comment..you sure you haven't got my blokes twin
Mine actually cuddles me thats how i know he wants some
Or coming up and grabbing me while i'm doing something..or actually leaving his usual position hunched over the xbox and coming over to give me a kiss.
For apparently 'no reason'
They're so predictable