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Original poster

Have any of you married your "lover"?

334 replies

MoreSpamThanGlam · 26/01/2008 17:18

What I mean is, have you been the other woman and he left and then you got married?

Or have you/are you the other woman?

AND - does this mean that you are a troll of the relationship type (marriage wrecker/evil queen).

OP posts:
Anna8888 · 27/01/2008 20:32

SoupDragon - so idealistic

People only get into new relationships once they have found the upgrade , doncha know?

expatinscotland · 27/01/2008 20:34

'People only get into new relationships once they have found the upgrade , doncha know? '

Well, the unimaginative and banal ones, I'm sure .

Anna8888 · 27/01/2008 20:36

No, the ones who aren't completely dumb and don't want to throw their lives away on a whim

expatinscotland · 27/01/2008 20:37

Or who have absolutely no respect for themselves, their other halfs and their families and are too selfish to end it all before humiliating everyone .

expatinscotland · 27/01/2008 20:37

halves, that should read.

expatinscotland · 27/01/2008 20:37

halves, that should read.

morningpaper · 27/01/2008 20:38

But Soupy that is a view of someone who understands what it's like to be in a serious relationship. A lot of younger women simply won't have any idea of what that's LIKE. It's basically a MATURE view. But not everyone is mature.

At our wedding, DH said "When you marry the mistress, you create a vacancy"

obviously I slapped him

expatinscotland · 27/01/2008 20:39

Charming, MP!

soapbox · 27/01/2008 20:39

I don't think that finding happiness in a new relationship and not having extramarital affairs are mutually exclusive.

The decent thing to do for all concerned is to finish one relationship before starting another.

It always astonishes me how dissatisfied people suddenly become with the old partner only once they have a replacement model lined up.

I think a great deal more courage and decency would go a long way. If you've had your fill of a poor relationship END IT, then you are free to go and find a new one!

SoupDragon · 27/01/2008 20:42

No, it's not idealistic.

Makes no difference to me though, MP. I'd still feel the same wrt the deserving of contempt. Sorry! Nothing personal, honest

I've seen too many people hurt and lives destroyed to feel any other way.

macdoodle · 27/01/2008 20:44

Well said soup

macdoodle · 27/01/2008 20:44

Well said soup

macdoodle · 27/01/2008 20:45

Well said soap

macdoodle · 27/01/2008 20:45

oh dear sleep deprivation me ...new baby ...must go to bed now

morningpaper · 27/01/2008 21:34

well on the bright side, I've NOT slept with most of the married men who propositioned me

surely that deserved extra points

Original poster
MoreSpamThanGlam · 27/01/2008 21:43

MP - you are obviously a hottie to have so many men proposition you!!!

OP posts:
morningpaper · 27/01/2008 21:45

sadly I was just quite, quite mad

(N.B. Good line in the Peep Show "I'm going to get laid. She has that perfect combination of low self esteem and beauty." grin])

Monkeytrousers · 27/01/2008 22:18

I do wish there was one married man who would...not that I would do anything to encourage him mind...I'm too moral!

Monkeytrousers · 27/01/2008 22:20

Sorry, that should read,

There is one married man that I wish would propostion me..blah blah..makes sense now

Monkeytrousers · 27/01/2008 22:21

OH MP, I cringed at that line when I saw that episode - a perfect desctiption of me circa early 90s

blueshoes · 27/01/2008 22:31

exactly soap. Only the coward and morally deficient would leave his/her spouse when there is a potential partner in sight. To every woman who embarks on a relationship with a man still married to his wife would do well to remember that what goes around comes around. She is not getting the prize but the dregs. If both parties waited until he had sorted his situation out, then she would know she is getting an honorable man, a real gem in these times.

And I find married men who proposition other women similarly worthy of pity. I have never contemplated ever taking up such dubious offers, sheesh, so sleazy. Ugh, got to have a shower.

BTW, expat, I like the quote from Dangerous Liaisons.

monkeytrousers · 27/01/2008 22:38

I agree to a point - it is better to embark on a relationship after your have dealt with your previious one; and it is a sign of some psychological/personality disorders if you constantly jump from one to the next, without any gaps inbetween. But that's also not to say that it just doesn't happen that people fall in love and are actually very brave to act on that..life is comlicated. One of the first things I said to DP was that we 'both had parachutes'. I'd really like it if he could find somebody to be happy - I wouldn;t even mind if there was a crossover! As long as DS and me were still there as 'son' and 'friend'.

monkeytrousers · 27/01/2008 22:40

I didn't get the DL quote at all. Will have another look tomorrow.

JustMissyNow · 27/01/2008 22:41

there has been a thread like this before if i remember rightly
i suppose i was the other woman as they were still married but yes we are now married with 2 dd's

expatinscotland · 27/01/2008 22:41

It's not to meant to be moral, MT, that quote. Because I'm in no place to throw stones.

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