Dating thread 234 ... spooky times ahead

[BelladiMamma]

New thread!

Could someone else please copy and paste the rules ...?

@Definitelycross

dont's are
Don't get too excited

Don't tell them too much
Don't feel too awful if it doesn't land

excellent advise !

Not sure what AMA means ( I’m so behind the times), but, if I was Mr2Pugs and liked you, I would certainly keep my thoughts about your rack to myself ( even if I fancied a closer look).

AMA - ask me anything
I think

What's the Bumble hack to see who likes you? Is it only if you have already liked them that you can see them?

Oh, you’re all absolutely right. And I have high hopes that such gentlemanly conduct is a good sign. I’m just venting my frustration! I have been single and celibate for nine years and it has not once ever even crossed my mind that I fancied a bit. And now suddenly I do, and it appears I need to wait until bloody Christmas! (I’m mildly worried that I might have gone off the idea by then!)

I’m absolutely letting him set the pace, as he is clearly the more sensible of the two of us, and anyway I don’t want to frighten him off.

Mr medic is coming out of his shell a little and after some flirty texting last night has admitted this evening that he was very nervous the weekend he stayed over - hoping this means that sexy time will be better once he is more comfortable 😁

Aww Slothy…perhaps there’s a chance there things will get better in the bed department. This will surely change your outlook on him
Im nervous about DTD with MrF in case things are not that good…we’ll see

Personally I think the early communications are a bit of a tightrope, you have to show interest and keenness, but at the same time avoid the Benny Hill style comments

Indeed. I am biting my tongue a lot. I know it’s silly and childish and a bit crude in the wrong place. But dammit, I feel silly and childish and a bit crude. That’s why I’m doing this. And I have to be a boring grown up all the rest of the time and I am over it. It used to drive me mad when late DH made innuendo out of every tiny thing I said when I was just trying to get stuff done, too.

@Eeksteek , if your keen, show a bit of cleavage, or a few slightly flirty texts.

Hi everyone,

Thanks for all your feedback on the salsa dancing lessons. Much appreciated. 🙂

This guy has messaged me on Match. He claims to have schizophrenia and OCD, and has gone to great lengths in his message to convince me that his mental health 'doesn't effect his life much.'

I'm a bit wary of replying to him. I know it's great that he's being honest, and that he's trying to emphasise with me, but I don't want to potentially get myself into a tricky situation. ❤️

C'est moi. I'm back dating.

After a long and sometimes lovely few months MrD and I have parted ways.

I have a few irons on my roster but for those of you actively dating, please tell me which sites you're using that you like...!

@Mila14 you seem to be winning in the numbers and frequency game. Which platforms are you using and are you in London or nearby...?

Anyone in the SE who can also date London care to share their tips?

I'm not really up for a life partner at the moment. Just someone whose bones I'd like to jump on a regular basis.

Not sure I'll start again properly before Christmas but I am definitely up for doing some research and dusting off the old 'come hither' profile pics. Of course not forgetting the ones with no make up and full length, preferably taken by someone else ...!

Match is okay at the moment, though I've just had yet another 50 year old message me.

And I've just done a search of my local area and I've just seen Mr Gambit! 😂 I don't know why he bothers on the dating front. He's always 'busy with work.' 🙂❤️

@BelladiMamma sorry to hear about you and Mr D ❤️

So.. after a week of OLD, I have had 2 dates with 2 very nice guys who I have had a lot in common with. Conversation flowed etc but… no spark! Is that the general gist or am I doing something wrong? I am on eharmomy..

I would say that’s about right, you have done much better than I ever did ( 2 dates in 1 week, much better than my number ever were) , I had a few dates with some nice enough women but no spark.

I don’t know about frequency Bella…but I am in London so you get more chances perhaps. I use Bumble. I’m sorry about MrD, he was a long standing FWB for you but you were already looking around a bit and unsure about keeping the arrangement so I hope you are ok
@Mollymolloy …I have been on very nice dates too but no chemistry. I think it’s good to get out there and see what works for you any way

@Slothmomma mr medic sounds lovely! 💕

I have developed a crush out of nowhere on a guy I already know and work with ill call him Mr Cyprus! (I have a type..😂😂) we have loads in common and chat loads more in work recently. However as far as I’m aware he has a g/f.. wondering if I’m so sad that I can get a crush on someone just because they’re really nice, and I feel like there’s a connection and he's really easy to chat to, we get on well etc. So I’m just squashing it down/ hiding it / telling you guys, because as far as I know he’s attached.

Still though, been ages since I felt a connection with anyone at all, so it’s good to feel that little spark come alive in me again! 💖

I’m really getting a bit bothered by the lack of banter of MrF. It’s too goody good shoes. Perhaps because we will not meet until next Friday I am getting jitters? I have never ever dated someone so serious by text or on the phone. I have to admit it is a relief I don’t need to constantly answer texts with ever sexier or wittier remarks and I am also aware we still have not DTD so it’s a bit weird to say we “miss miss” each other. But he’s too courteous, he does not compliment me and this is totally new territory for me.
I have to admit that the super banter guys and over appreciative ones never amounted to more than a date or not so good sex. I’m conflicted because in one way I love it he’s restrained while being considerate (he calls me everyday and wants to know about my life and my kids etc and he shares his too). I don’t know how to gage passion. But I know when we are together he’s all over me like a rash… I guess I will just have to be patient
His ex wife was also Euro and quite fiery for the little he’s told me about her.

Butterfly …nothing wrong with developing a crush but be careful not to get hurt and if he’s attached …it’s definitely dangerous territory because more people can get hurt. If it’s an innocent crush and makes you feel perky there’s nowt wrong with it 😊

@Mila14 I have found that I have to balance the early comms quite carful too much banter / chat in the early days has generally not gone down too well, at least until after dtd.
NoShow is a bit Daily Mail reading / Home Counties on the quiet, so it wasn’t until we dtd the 1st time that I could kinds relax in myself if you see what I mean) Mr F might be doing the same.

Today is my B’day and NoShow has been sending me the most filthy messages of what she wants todo to me 😊, but previously she wouldn’t have said boo to a goose, but I have somehow managed to to get her inner sex goddess to show its head now & again, I think she has probably always been a bit like that, but feels safe now to show it more.

just be patient, people are so fucking surprising at times

Happy birthday @NoDatingForOldMen - sounds like you have quite the bday gift in store 😉😁

Hi 👋 @BelladiMamma I'm sorry to hear that and hope you are ok with the parting of ways.

I've used Bumble and Tinder
Used to have an absolute principle of swiping left on any profile with no words written. If you can't be bothered to write a short para about yourself then I'm not interested but both my date0 tonight (MrLocal) and previous red hot iron of last weekends bonkathon slipped through the net as neither had words. Just some quite rubbish pictures. Both fairly nearby though.

Happy birthday @NoDatingForOldMen . Hope you have a wonderful day 🥳

@BelladiMamma sorry to hear that you and Mr D have parted company. Hope you are feeling okay about it, 💐

happy birthday Howlongy I’m so glad Mrs Show is making you happy. Soon you will have a real fest.

MrF just dropped the B ( he said “you are beautiful “) after 3 dates and weeks chatting. It totally knocked me sideways because he’s just not the kind.
Normally the guys I have dated regaled my ears non stop and bantered crazy sexy.
MrF dropped the bomb and no more texting. He’s a serious type