Dating thread 234 ... spooky times ahead

[BelladiMamma]

New thread!

Could someone else please copy and paste the rules ...?

For me too. For similar reasons. And feminism, obviously.

You’re all right. Jeans a nice top is the way to go. Pity the blasted cleavage top has evaporated. Oh well, it might have been a bit too much anyway. Don’t want to frighten to poor man off!

Have had some OLD reflection thoughts as I look back on my two irons of the summer who

✅ Had loads in common - places and history and tribes to an extent
✅Loved the same music, books and art
✅Bounced dry wit off each other and made each other laugh a lot
✅ Fancied each other enough to have some great bonkathons
✅ Had jobs and talents which made me all swoony

And yet both were a flash in the pan/amounted to nothing.

Therefore I really can't be arsed to assess new irons on anything other than what comes out no point in having a list of things when actually all that matters is they are honest, trustworthy, decent and are actually into us - the real us/who we are (and pheromones/bedroom compatibility) etc etc.

So I'm changing tack and it's mainly down to my new easy going wanton status.

I'll keep the thread updated with my findings.

MrCurly has taken the bait but declined as not available on my free night. Probs just as well as I have an early start the next day for a business trip and beat not to arrive disheveled reeking of red wine and sperm.

Oh. I didn’t know he had kids under 18…I totally get that then…is he some kind of hippie type??

well everyone seemed to have a good time, I made Italian & served it with a decent red ( I don’t drink much anymore so had to be careful), watched some Netflix & had a good time ( everything worked how it should) & she still likes how I make breakfast.

PS, question for the ladies, how on earth do fasten you bra behind your back, I watched NoShow get dressed and it’s something to behold, like a magic trick. I had enough trouble getting the damn thing in front on me.

I have an early start the next day for a business trip and best not to arrive disheveled reeking of red wine and sperm.

yikes, nearly dropped my cornflakes reading that..

Hey @NoDatingForOldMen that's a wonderful update. Hooray for a good time and everything working as it should. Bravo.

I do my bra up around my waist then swizzle it to the back and hoik my arms and boobs in. Always have. 40 years now.

Sorry about the cornflake dropping moment. Just as well Curly has declared him busy but then proceeded to indulge me in some very spicy sexts about what we are going to do to each other the next time we meet...
cystitis remains and I don't think I'd have made the early train with my plans of a late night bonk session.

MrLocal is not a hippy. Will see how things go on Saturday with our Date0

I think the criteria for a potential new LT partner and a FWB / shag are very different

its sex , so for me sexual chemistry and a degree of compatability and shared values are key
so I would not shag an arms dealer
well , maybe 🤔 if he was hot !!

but the books they read , politics , that’s not really relevant as it’s a weekly shag basically

and I find people different to me exciting and hot

i sometimes even wonder if a LT partner love is even on the cards for me , given I’m going to be a FT lone parent for at least 6 more years
Who knows

Bingo @Thisisworsethananticpated that's why I'm so suddenly less bothered and also retrospectively seeing that those who where always only going to be FWB I could have saved myself giving a monkeys about how good their DIY & guitar playing skills were if I worked out they always just shags.

New way of thinking with MrLocal - he's clearly very much not life partner material - unhinged, living hand to mouth and leaving 3 x under 13 kids to go travelling for 6+ months.
Handsome though. And funny. So gets a meet-up and maybe if that goes ok some physicals. 🤷

@NoDatingForOldMen it’s easier from the inside, because you are pulling it away from your body, not towards. Lots of women do swizzle, but my OT friends say it’s bad for bras. I haven’t had a wire come out (and try to kill me!) since I stopped swivelling.

@Thisisworsethananticpated I know. I mean, how do you have a long term relationship that develops without your children when you live with them? You can go on dates and get babysitters, but there’s no way to blend your lives much even if you can figure out how to construct a relationship that includes children. I can’t see an overnight happening more than once a fortnight, with perhaps the odd sneaky weekday afternoon or school night date. (Mr2Pugs is his own boss, so can hopefully, um, squeeze me in between meetings sometimes. Although I think he might be rather more successful than I first imagined, which is both attractive and a bit scary)

I have no idea how I’m going to manage this. It’s one of the big reasons I haven’t really pursued a relationship up to now. I have no idea how to make it work in practice. I’m not worrying about it at the moment. If someone wants me enough they’ll be patient while we figure it out. If they don’t, well, they didn’t want it enough. I can see nothing but problems in future, tbh, but dammit, I’m going to enjoy myself NOW and deal with future if it gets here.

I have a childfree evening ahead so have agreed to meet Mr city for a catch up and drinks 😱 then have coffee tomorrow with old fwb - although he I'd solely just a friend now

Slothmomma

ooooh !!!!! That’s exciting

Eeky
**
If someone wants me enough they’ll be patient while we figure it out. If they don’t, well, they didn’t want it enough.

I wholeheartedly agree with this. I don’t fret about it. I only like to date guys with kids anyway. My current iron has DD pretty much half time. One needs to work around these things or find a woman with no kids I reckon.

Agreed…I look at a lot of things not just chemistry so it’s quite difficult I think 🤔… I’m adamant I don’t want a FWB …

Wow Slothy…🚨🚨🚨🚨 Mr City is your real cup of coffee…what will happen between you two???

@Mila14 we're meeting as friends for a catch up after all his travels (but I will report back tomorrow 😁)

A catch up…hmmm…with drinks…you fancied each other…you are both looking for partner…🤔. Mothership awaits…ho hum…have FUN

@Mila14 that's the thing - I'm not sure he was actually looking for a partner because he's so busy but I do enjoy his company- I will report back 😁

I just called MrLocal who I want to rename but no matter. And he and I had a brilliant chat, very two way, funny, interesting and easy. He has a very sexy voice. And thinks I do too.
Looking forward to meeting him far more than I was before we chatted now tbh.

@OnceRuralNowUrbanbliss ooh nice! I think a sexy voice is important. Find it hard to fancy someone otherwise. What accent does he have?

@OnceRuralNowUrbanbliss Mr local sounds like its going to be a good one 🤞

Well my catch up with Mr city was eventful. We ended up back at his and dtd 😱 he asked if I wanted to stop the night but I came home around 1ish.

We discussed what had happened previously and he admitted that he cancelled our sleepover date 3 as didn't want to lead me on as he wasn't looking for a conventional relationship as doesn't have time to commit to it. He said that he could see that I'd probably fall for him (not arrogance- he's right) and didn't think it fair. But we fancy each other like crazy so I dtd knowing full well it will lead to nothing but well why not 🤷‍♀️😁

@Stayingstrongish …I once unmatched a guy that looked nice when he left me a voice message…squeaky nasal voice…proper turn off . Voice and tone of voice can be unbelievably sexy in a man. Oncey …looks like MrLocal has a lot more going than you thought. 😊

Ooooooh @Slothmomma that's some update. The stride of pride at 1am eh? Good for you and for City for being straight up. Nice work both. Hope you feel all energised and floaty like I did on Sunday. Keep us posted with emotions and developments...

Slothy wow…I remember you saying MrCity was the one that got away. It’s amazing how you ended up finally with him. Yes he’s busy and traveling crazy but you just never know. I think you’ve had a very frank chat too and if he’s done the step of DTD and being with you is because you really really do fancy each other like crazy. I wish you all the best dealing with this emotionally. But there’s no reason why you can’t have fun and crazy super sex without falling in love or without being committed. You only live once…
What will you do with Mr medic ?

Hes very much not wanting to fall into a relationship that ends up with someone being mad at him for how much he works/travels etc (like his ex wife) so I don't think he will risk seeing me again. He is still my one that got away unfortunately.

As for Mr medic I'm not sure. I will wait till we actually see each other again to see how I feel I guess