Dating Thread 233 - Being Our True Selves

[SortingItOut]

The Rules:

1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. Know your worth.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

@OnceRuralNowUrbanbliss - I agree with what others and you have said about someone blocking or not blocking you.

It's them not you. In Mr Art's case, yes, he probably is embarrassed about his ED but that's his issue, not yours.

I recall over lockdown I matched with someone who seemed lovely, until it came to meeting and he was an anti vaxxer, anti mask wearer etc. He then just decided to block straight after that and asked me to delete his number - which I did. I suppose he told me the reasons why he was blocking me but he was just weird full stop. Another man, lockdown too, wanted someone for sex texts and flirting (we were both bored to be fair) but blocked when it came to meeting etc.

Oncey… great that you can now have closure and move on
But yes… a guy that’s not interested in you and who you are only wants FWB or FB… nothing else

Urgh swiping is so yuck. I'd forgotten. Haven't been on the apps for nearly two years now apart from that one upset blip night in June which resulted in Mr Flake (was Art).

I should really delete them. Gird my loins and snuggle in for the winter but I'm an addict to the witty textuals when it arises.

It's probs way too late to say good luck to @Slothmomma for Mr Medic Birthday Date2 and wtaf to the deranged dude wanting his money back after a sex refusal was issued. Wow we see it all don't we.

Oncey…its great to see you back feeling a lot better. Take a few days off before swiping!!

Slothy…the mothership awaits your report on date 2

Probably should @Mila14 but only need one decent bite to be distracted by textuals with an interesting sounding man. Have had a few bites and messages since my eeeeuw update just now. Im so easily distracted!

Confession my best mate persuaded me out of rushing to send Dear John to Mr Flake/Art despite her being the opposite of a wise experienced OLD soothsayer claiming he might just be having a hard time right now and would be a shame to bin off a good one so urgently. So he's now breadcrumbing me and actually I find myself actually hoping I can send the 'Cheers then byeeee' text. I will but will not rush.

You know better what to do Oncey…😊… be free to decide

I'm home from date 2 with Mr medic and it was lovely. He looked fab - very smart - and has the most amazing eyes. I actually felt a little shy around him. We've already said we'd like to meet again and want to continue getting to know each other - and he did get a birthday kiss 😄

@ButterflyOfShay ❤️💋❤️

Sounds fantastic @Slothmomma!
We love a good news story.
Good kisser? Asked questions? Made you laugh? (As well as having incredible eyes).

Happy birthday to you too as you said yours and Mr Medic's were close.

🥰🥰🥰🥰😍😍😍😍 so HAPPY FOR YOU!Your Mr Medic looking brilliant, especially after kiss

Thanks both 😊

@OnceRuralNowUrbanbliss good kisser although need to explore further when not stood in the rain in the car park 😄 Never kissed anyone with a full beard before but I liked it. And yes he asked questions and made me laugh. Like I said I did feel shy so I'm looking forward to a date where we can actually have a drink which may help with my nerves 😆

Hes messaged today to ask when we can next meet up again so we've pencilled in Sunday evening. I have the kids most of the time but as they are teens now I can nip out for an hour or so if close to home and so far he hasn't minded coming over my way to accommodate this.

And thanks for the bday wishes - mine is Saturday at which point I will then be closer to 50 than I am to 40 😄

@Slothmomma
whats it like kissing a bearded bloke ( beardy here).?

Closer to 50 than 40, so just a young women then. 😄

• NoDatingForOldMen.

Slothmomma

awweeee ! I’m happy for ya
it all sounds so calm and nice and no angst
go you

Exchanged a handful of messages with Ms Unique (her own description) on POF today and are going out for a drink on Saturday.

Not massively enthused as she comes across as very sarcastic and flippant and I take her profile with a pinch of salt, eg claims to be 50 and retired, claims to have Masters degree but can't spell.

Nothing ventured nothing gained I suppose and I have naff all on this weekend.

@HowlongWillThisTakeNow I don't feel like a young woman I can assure you 😄 As for kissing a proper beardy guy it was different but I like it and hurt less than usual stuble guys 😀

Yes @Thisisworsethananticpated I haven't felt anxious about this one at all .... so far 😄

@TobyEsterhase
just the name would put me off & sarcasm is just an instant no.
People not being able to spell doesn’t put me off, but most apps have spell checkers, so no excuses really ( I have a undergraduate degree & my spelling is terrible)
Retired at 50 eh? , that sounds great, I could do with some of that.

TobyEsterhase

jesus your not selling her ! Let’s hope she’s super sexy 😄😄

Slothmomma

not feeling anxious is such a green nice flag

something we so rarely see on here !

despite my voluntarily signing myself off for mental health (it’s actually been pretty awful) I did feel some frissons for the male Pilates teacher yesterday
he touched my foot 🦶!
so that’s a green shoot

@TobyEsterhase I’m always fascinated when I hear of people arranging dates with someone when they’re not enthused by them - does she have other redeeming features?!

I could not be arsed to go on a date unless I was at the least mostly excited/positive/neutral about the person.

My worst date was with someone whose biggest crime pre-date was revealing that he used tissue paper to pack his suitcase before travelling. I thought my god I couldn’t go out with someone who did that 😬

Great date news @Slothmomma ! I love a beard me.

I hate people lying about their education level. MrO lied about his age but the thing that really pissed me off is the post grade. He was extremely articulate but there was no Uni in his linked in , only secondary education. I didn’t mind then he lied about age because he looks 10 years younger to be honest and is super fit.

I would not worry about her being flippant… she may be shy and nervous about meeting you
If she looks fab and you feel attracted to her that’s a good start.
Let’s see how it goes and report to the mothership 😉

I am still in talks with Mr Euro. He’s busy business traveling in Euro land but will be back tonight and I’m seeing him tomorrow. Very relaxed too. 2 texts a day from me and 2 texts from him. Simple. We want to see each other and see what happens. I prefer super busy guys to be honest
MrEx ultra busy with massive deal and badly stressed out . I will see him too at some point
I love my no kids week. Just recover myself and get to be a woman in a selfish self centered way

How interesting that people feel the need to lie 'aspirationally' @Mila14 @TobyEsterhase .... I'm an oxbridge PhD and never mention that on my dating profile as I know it will either put people off or they'll be very disappointed in me 😂

Dating thread 234 ... spooky times ahead www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/4649284-dating-thread-234-spooky-times-ahead

New thread here!