When I first met him he was newly single (3 months). That relationship lasted 10 years and he has 2 dcs. He moved back home because of financial reasons. He's paying maintenance and debt that he has, so can't afford a place of his own. He says that it's his plan but could possibly be home with his mum for years.
He didn't have any close friends when we first met 16 months ago. He comes over to mine, probably twice a week and I cook. We only see eachother once or twice a week as he has his dcs every other weekend and I work and have my own dcs. We have had date nights too, but money can sometimes be tight for us both. I have dcs and a mortgage etc. I also run a car. He doesn't drive.
He would struggle more during the week of boredom as he doesn't have any commitments throughout the week. He started gaming and started going to watch the football on Saturdays. He has started to learn to drive too as his mum offered to pay for 10 lessons for him. Just recently he has got back in touch with old school friends, one of which is single again and apparently 're living his youth' (he's 33). This single friend has gone back to live at home and spends most evenings in the local club, drinking and playing pool. Also, messaging different women whilst having an affair at work. He is also into sniffing cocaine. It's absolutely none of my business what this friend does. However, now the guy I'm seeing is drinking more and now smoking (he smoked years ago apparently). Again completely up to him but that's not the guy I met. It's a bit off putting. I guess he hasn't got anything to do when he's not with me but for some reason it's putting me off him. Nothing has changed with us. The change is the company he keeps. He says money is tight but he is drinking and smoking alot.
I'm wondering if there is anyone who is in a relationship but not living together. How do they spend there time when not with you. There is no way I'm going to tell someone how they should live their life but when you start dating someone, you have little things that would and wouldld be acceptable to you. I definitely wouldn't have started dating someone who drinks at their local 4 times a week and smokes 20 a day. Also has friends who take cochineal, even if they didn't. Each to their own but that not for me. Why is this putting me off him?