Dating Thread 232 - Loving Ourselves First

[SortingItOut]

The Rules:

1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. Know your worth.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

@Thisisworsethananticpated yeah but i do think texting these things is nearly pointless too, much better face to face. I'd like to think he misses me too, even a little. I'm inclined to just hang in there, let him have his boys night out and see if he messages again. I'm very surprised he didnt go to the party. I think much as I'd love to move forward with him my gut is telling me I wasnt getting what I deserve either. As was said previously, in time I might look back and realise this was never going to be enough.

Thanks Great idea, I’ll use the “let’s both get tested” approach I wouldn’t like her to get the impression that I think she might have an STI. ( but she might..)

field upgrade form lukewarm to “Caution, contents may be hot “.

Some of you may remember me! And sorry for posting a little selfishly as i haven’t caught up. But i’ll keep it brief.

All going swimmingly with the FWB(magnet-man for those who do ‘know’ me) no concerns, seeing each other weekly for our escapes. Anyway, he goes on holiday, says we’ll be able to catch up after 31st. All fine! Holidays didn’t tie in with each others and DS at home/back at school as well. He promises nothing will change and all of a sudden my msgs aren’t even being delivered. He sent a few selfies about two weeks ago, since then nothing… i think he’s back at work as of tomorrow? But its hit me like a ton of bricks. Any suggestions? At this stage i’m unsure whether i’ll hear anything. I haven’t sent anything since monday two weeks ago…

@Naimee87 … you are FWB… so luckily you are not that invested. I think when a guy shuts up and stop messaging it looks like he is moving . Also selfies can be sent to you and to someone else he’s getting to know.?? I have been guilty of sending selfie to iron 1 and then iron 2. And stop texting iron 1. It’s not FWB stage but I suspect when messages are not coming something is happening with someone else

Naimee87
i remember you 🙂

I’m a tiny wincing at Mila14 conclusion ! But if it was me I’d think same to be honest 🙈

and much depends on his character , and if he had a tendency to be quiet , in cave , or this is first time to go totally off grid

@Naimee87 I also remember you. you'll remember me too, though I have nc'ed. ❤️

@Naimee87 If he's abroad he might not have data for abroad or may have run out. It's expensive if you don't have a data plan for abroad.

He said you'll catch up after 31st, I'd not even start worrying until then.

If he's ghosted you then you move on and find another FWB.

@Naimee87 . I hope I am totally wrong and I want to be wrong. But I have also seen that when dating. If the iron in question gets quieter and quieter … something is up. If there was cave behavior from the start, I can totally understand him retreating. Hopefully he will be back 31st and your relationship will resume as you like it

Hello! Thanks for the comments! Nice to to know some of you remember me. Hahah after all this time. Always good to hear other opinions. He hasnt ever gone this long without communicating in an entire year. Even with his health issues/work changes and other shorter holidays, so this has just come out of nowhere which is why its shook me. When i was on holiday i somehow managed to delete our entire chat and he sent it back within minutes and photos too that he would know i would really miss of us. But in all honesty i think he is gone. I even have a birthday present for him sitting at home. If someone cares they keep in touch no matter how difficult or far away they are. Just a heads-up would have been appreciated. Oh well looks like i have to find me another Trucker man. If only there were a dating app just for them i would be all set 😂

@ICrunchCrispsNotNumbers hmmm can you give me a clue? 😁

@Naimee87 I'm probably one of the youngest people here....

@Naimee87 you probably can't guess as because the tone of my posts has changed dramatically. I used to be very depressed. I still suffer with depression and anxiety but things are getting better now. ❤️

Don't know where the 'as' came from, sorry 😀

Dancer?.... or onwards? not got a great memory actually... sorry!
@Mila14 i have read some of your shenanigans sounds like a lot of fun going on. There is a huge history with magnet-man! Probably should never have jumped into bed with him again but i did and find it really hard no to want to... chemistry it just incredible. Not really much else i can do for the time being. I think i could potentially have started sending -whats going on- type messages but nah, managed to leave him to it. Suppose if there isnt anything from him tomorrow he really isnt who i thought he was at all...

Ladies. I’ve done what I had to. I talked to Mr A and said I was going to see someone else and I don’t feel I can keep on ignoring I’m interested in this other person. It went really well. Shows he’s not only handsome but a really nice guy. He still wants to keep contact and see how I feel about Mr O
Im really invested in Mr O right now. We chat whenever I want to. I call him and he calls me all the time and we have plans for the weekend. We are both quite ready. I doubt he’s seeing anyone else to be honest. And I’m not seeing anyone else either. So. I think I’m jumping in . I think of Mr O all the time. He says the exact same
We had a massive super sexy fumble in the street the first time we dated and could not stop. We both arrived to our different homes and were still for 2 hours on the phone
Mr O and I have very similar interests and plan to do stuff together we like
I know this a potential mistake on my side as I really really like Mr A and Mr O is more difficult to figure out but I feel I have to risk it

@Naimee87 i'm Onwards! I got sick of that name, so changed it.

Dancer has got a iron, so she's not on the thread very much.

I had to quit college because I became very Ill at the beginning of the month, but i'm going back at the beginning of Sept.

I'm not dating currently, because I want to focus on college for the moment, but I want to go back next year, when my health and stuff is a bit better 🤞🏻❤️

...and I think I remember magnet man too 🙂

The youngest and the sweetest!! So good you are controlling your issues and feeling better all the time

@Mila14 ah thank you lovely. Really appreciate that ❤️

Stay focus on college. Whatever nice busy now you are to meet … can wait. College is where you grow as a woman and open possibilities

@Mila14 🙂❤️💋

Ladies… most weird thing. Mr A still wants to keep dating me even if I see other guys. WTF????
I don’t understand???
Can this mean he wanted to date me while seeing other ladies or what???
i don’t know?!!???
he says we have a lovely connection and doesn’t want to stop seeing me

I am dumbfounded

Tips on how to get over first date nerves? I am finding them overwhelming.

Mila14 Some men don't mind as long as they are getting some.

@Mila14 MrA is wise. The early dating game is a tough one, things can change so easily and many of us advocate multi dating before the exclusivity conversation.

The only thing is, where does this leave MrO? Have you discussed how he feels about exclusivity? Monogamy in general?

@Naimee87 hiii 👋🏻 ... hadn't MagnetMan disappeared last year for a while? When you saw the elf guy? Hope you're good and that your DS's change of school has been positive.