Dating Thread 232 - Loving Ourselves First

[SortingItOut]

The Rules:

1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. Know your worth.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

I was cheated on and object to unwittingly and unknowingly being nearly made into a OW 😡

I've been unwittingly the OW and also cheated on. Both sides are shit shows. I also don't know what I'd do in your situation... I do remember feeling relieved when I knew my ex had cheated because at least then, I thought, I wouldnt keep thinking I was mad or question why things felt off - I finally had my answer

Enjoy your date. The important thing is that you like him and are going to meet him. Keep fingers crossed for you😊

Wow!!!! Why do this??! Did he tell you he was single? Is this a guy you wanted to have relationship with or just FWB?

@Mila14 he told me he was single. Matched on hinge. Looking to date with view to relationship but clearly he's just looking for something in side when he's down here in week for work

Thank you Mila14 x

Awful…was he texting nicely and being lovely? I don’t understand why lie. One thing is that you are multiple dating to make your mind up. Another is that you have a clear serious partner. I think you should go ahead with your plan to oust the Mrs to him…

Yeah he even texted me last night whilst I was out with a friend saying he wished he were there and saying how fit I looked 🤦‍♀️

@Slothmomma …absolute bastard…hit him with his “secret” before you block him…what an arse

I have cut down a lot communication with MrA. He knows some is up as I haven’t planned anything. Oh well…
MrO is on fire. It’s so good to get answer to every single silly message immediately. No games. Conversations are varied. Ultra hot and sometimes very pragmatic about daily life. I love it. I paused bumble and removed him. So he sent me lovely pics. And asked me for a particular pic I had . I really don’t mind him dating around until we get together but I have no idea how he manages as he’s on the phone with me non stop 😂😂😂
there’s too much sexual tension so there really is nothing else we can do but just go mad and DTD.
if it doesn’t work out like I think I will disappear but I am super invested now. I can’t think of anyone else. It’s totally mad. Exactly like it was when I met Mr EX but this time I am soooo relaxed and having fun.
I was riddled with insecurities and panic when I fell in love with mr EX. This is different but I can easily fall in love with this guy.
I’m being frank here because who am I kidding? We are here for support and if I crash I will be back. But I need a break from apps.

Hi everyone,

Long time lurker and sometimes poster but I've changed username....

Ok I need some help, I've matched with someone that I've now realised is a British comedy actor... I need a funny as fuck opening message!

I was an OW as well, and found out in a similar way to you @Slothmomma. We'd DTD and I felt dreadful after it. Only found out as he had a work van he used to pick me up once as he was self employed and the surname on the side was spelt differently to how he'd told me. So when I googled the original name I found nothing, when I googled the name on the van there he was, complete with lovely wife and four children in the FB photo...

Welcome 99sfilm
…wow …do you need to be funny? I think if you have matched that’s good enough! Maybe he isn’t even expecting any comedy lines? Just enjoy

Jesus!! I normally only look at Linked in …never checked FB…😳

Crikey @Daisysunset that's horrible ☹️ I love that fb links once you are on whatsapp and suggests people you might know. But it must likewise be showing me on his so why hasn't he put 2 and 2 together 🤔 he's just started messaging again asking how my evening was and and telling me how attractive I looked/am 🤦‍♀️

That’s horrible @Slothmomma 💐

Good luck @Datingadvice !

I’ve gone all wrong and gone a bit swoony about a bumble match 😳

@GoldenMirror …oh …do tell…😊🤓

I’ve gone all teenagery @Mila14 , by accident!

he’s funny, thinks I’m funny, volunteers that he wants a relationship, that He’s not multi dating/chatting, (not like me 😳) right age, location, flirty but not sleazy banter… Did the chat into the night the past couple of nights, messaged before.

i know, I know. It’s silly. But boy, it’s fun.

That sounds brilliant @GoldenMirror …are you meeting him soon?

@GoldenMirror what a great update, sounds like you might be on to something there!

@Slothmomma have you dropped the bomb on the cheat yet?

@Daisysunset not yet, waiting for him to try and firm up Wednesday date

That’s the best you can do @SortingItOut .. live your best life (as cheesey as that sounds)
yep 100% having a good balance of socialising and down time is the key. Glad you’re doing good though 🤍

@Thisisworsethananticpated been drinking too much but in 3 days I’m going T-total til december! Actually so bored of drinking and looking forward to this lil challenge!

Slothmomma

oy vey
how unpleasant
and clearly very bad at hiding his tracks
the sooner you discard this negative energy the better

@LuckyLinda3 sorry you’re going through those feelings it’s really hard just the silence and wondering if you’ll ever clear the air 😔 he sounds really immature though.

@Slothmomma urgh so glad you found out!! Snake!!