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Original poster

How do I get lodger to leave

170 replies

Poomamabear · 20/08/2022 13:00

Lodger doesn’t have a written agreement. been here 1.6 years.

His behaviour has got worse recently and I’m sick of it. I’m not happy in my own home. So I asked him to leave.

There was an incident which I was waiting for.

i don’t think he realises he has to move.

so I’m going to follow up with a what’s app message.

any tips or anything? I don’t want to get into a dialogue.

OP posts:
Original poster
Poomamabear · 20/08/2022 13:58

SusanPill · 20/08/2022 13:51

Fair enough. It is hard and not for everyone. To be honest I really hated being a lodger, it was like having a parent and I was told off for existing. Never again. Not saying you’re like that. I ended up pretty much living at work as it was so depressing to be begrudged for ‘existing’ but my expensive rent was always welcome!

Sorry venting, you have my sympathy, it’s hard when it doesn’t work out, what has he actually said when you have mentioned you want the home back to yourself?

Well that’s how he feels…. As he’s said “not mum/dad/pay your mortgage”. Etc.

which I can understand if I’m al ate asking him to do stuff which I don’t

OP posts:
GuerlainHo · 20/08/2022 14:02

LetHimHaveIt · 20/08/2022 13:50

Why are you insisting he put a desk up
in his room?

Technically it’s HER room…

LetHimHaveIt · 20/08/2022 14:08

GuerlainHo · 20/08/2022 14:02

Technically it’s HER room…

Show quote history

Ok. That now makes it not a weird thing to insist someone does. Erecting a specific piece of furniture within 72 hours.

Tallisker · 20/08/2022 14:10

Wasn't it take his desk out of the shared living space and put it up in his room? That's how I read it

GuerlainHo · 20/08/2022 14:12

@LetHimHaveIt
From what OP has indicated; it was HIS desk and she asked him to bring it to the room he is staying in. He refused for 3 days then once she told him it wasn’t working and he has to look for alternative living arrangements; he bought the desk up and erected it in the hopes of making things ok.

that’s what I read it as and if that’s the case; again - it’s her house. She has every right to do so and make HER house, comfortable for HER

LetHimHaveIt · 20/08/2022 14:15

Tallisker · 20/08/2022 14:10

Wasn't it take his desk out of the shared living space and put it up in his room? That's how I read it

Apologies. I now see it says his deck up in his room. I thought for a minute the OP had some weird flat-pack fetish.

haveiever · 20/08/2022 14:17

OP you do know your lodger has posted a thread about this from his perspective? So he’ll probably see this, job done

picklemewalnuts · 20/08/2022 14:17

I think OP's communication skills are not the best, and her lodger is a bit passive aggressive. Possibly they're both passive aggressive. However, it's not working.

OP I suggest asking him how soon he can move out, and say you are working out a notice period. Does he pay up front?

Tallisker · 20/08/2022 14:17

Apologies. I now see it says his deck up in his room. I thought for a minute the OP had some weird flat-pack fetish.

🤣

AlisonDonut · 20/08/2022 14:18

www.tenancyagreementservice.co.uk/lodger-legal-rights

Maybe look at some legal sites to work out what rights you have and some idea of notice periods?

Novum · 20/08/2022 14:23

haveiever · 20/08/2022 14:17

OP you do know your lodger has posted a thread about this from his perspective? So he’ll probably see this, job done

Are you referring to the reverse thread OP posted?

hedgehoglurker · 20/08/2022 14:24

I read one where the OP was insisting that the lodger replaced the desk in his room with a new, larger flat pack one. Both provided by the OP, as it was a furnished room. The OP couldn't understand why the lodger was content with their current desk, and didn't want to replace it on her whim.

I'm assuming this is the same OP, but I may be wrong.

Leafy3 · 20/08/2022 14:29

I agree with pp that unless you have concerns for your safety, you need to give him reasonable notice to leave. Make sure you put it in writing to him with when he has to leave by.

I sympathise but not liking each other isn't enough reason to just chuck him out.

Sugarpiehoney · 20/08/2022 14:32

Poomamabear · 20/08/2022 13:42

Yes

Show quote history

Why are you lying? That was YOU who posted that and admitted it was a reverse. Why are you trying to say it was your lodger who posted it?

IncompleteSenten · 20/08/2022 14:32

Follow up in writing.
Give him a week.
He's a lodger not a tenant.

jay55 · 20/08/2022 14:32

Stick a note on his door with a clear date he has to leave by on.

With lodgers then law is woolly, you need to give 'reasonable notice' , up to you to decide what that is.

fuckblippi · 20/08/2022 14:42

Oh you're the desk lady.

Just stick to the 3 days, send a reminder, then change the locks.

SusanPill · 20/08/2022 14:43

@picklemewalnuts I agree especially with the glacial drip feed here.

I think there is sometimes two sides to this sort of scenario, it can be all too easy to both become passive aggressive instead of communicating. It’s best just to make a decision and put it in writing with a clear date, unless he’s put your safety at risk etc then call the police in as pp said. Everyone is getting riled up about chucking him out without any facts that would require such a harsh reaction.

SusanPill · 20/08/2022 14:43

*chucking his stuff out

whynotwhatknot · 20/08/2022 14:44

youve already asked him to go now set a date weeks time or whatever yo feel is right and tell him its not working out

Cherchezlaspice · 20/08/2022 14:45

Ah, I remember you! The desk and the ‘paying your mortgage’. You didn’t like the responses you got on the previous thread, I take it? 😂

SusanPill · 20/08/2022 14:46

Can I ask other posters what the desk situation is? Because again it just sounds like the perils of these sorts of situations. It’s how it’s all dealt with. I’ve done stuff like that when I was a lodger when I was unexpectedly called into cover a night shift or something. I’m not an arsehole, I hope I’m not, unfortunately you still have an ongoing life as a lodger and things slip your mind. They can’t live like a ghost! It’s just how it’s dealt with. Had he been very hostile op?

isthismylifenow · 20/08/2022 15:01

Am I the only one who is confused by this thread....?

Original poster
Poomamabear · 20/08/2022 15:05

SusanPill · 20/08/2022 14:46

Can I ask other posters what the desk situation is? Because again it just sounds like the perils of these sorts of situations. It’s how it’s all dealt with. I’ve done stuff like that when I was a lodger when I was unexpectedly called into cover a night shift or something. I’m not an arsehole, I hope I’m not, unfortunately you still have an ongoing life as a lodger and things slip your mind. They can’t live like a ghost! It’s just how it’s dealt with. Had he been very hostile op?

Been acting like a child yes so no wonder he saying I’m not his mum/dad

OP posts:
Scepticalwotsits · 20/08/2022 15:06

Probably one for legal, not having an agreement doesn’t mean one is in force, and being in England or Scotland will like likely result in different legal mechanisms to evict

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