Traditions in his family are weird, If I have to do that. I will do it myself!!!

[newmumy2022]

My partner's family tradition is weird.
Must have had earrings in my daughter's ears when she was three months old.
I was resistant. But if I really had to do it, I would do it myself.

Is there anyone in or around Liverpool who has done Baby ear piercings?
Any good places to recommend?
And what kind of earrings should I prepare?

I wonder if maybe this kind of mini earrings could fit?

https://www.trendollajewelry.com/collections/nap-earrings/products/trendolla-king-crown-earrings-ball-back-earrings-nap-earrings

Help!!!
FFFF!!!

Just say no! Are you going to go for FGM too?

My daughter had hers done at 9 at a reputable piercer. Her ears her choice.

Its child abuse.Horrific. shouod be banned by law.

That’s your opinion.

just last week my friends daughters ears were pierced at 4 and she had a completely positive experience.

I had my ears pierced at this age because it was a cultural norm. Apparently I pulled them out. Luckily it didn’t cause any damage but it could have. Unless you desperately want it done, I wouldn’t agree to it.

Claire's uses a piercing gun, which is dangerous. One randomer using anecdata from the experience of ONE child, to try and make out than an unhygienic shop floor with a non-sterilised gun is safe doesn't discount that.

If you want to show willing I would maybe go along with the idea but then tell him you couldn’t find anywhere willing to do it that wasn’t really grim and that several piercers warned you babies of that age could rip our earrings and swallow them.

DD is your family. Make it a tradition that she won't have her ears pierced for years. If you follow this "tradition" you're setting a precedent for following all manner of weirdness in the future.

I don’t think anyone is suggesting ear piercing is as bad as FGM. It’s more just pointing out that tradition is not a good enough reason to do something you don’t agree with. OP is using tradition to justify ear piercing. Some cultures use tradition to justify FGM. Where do you draw the line?

Just a week. Well, there's another few of those before the fistulas heal.

She might be lucky. But I very much doubt it.

Your OP stated that you don't want this done.
Now you're asking for recommendations.

So you're talking bollocks and you just want recommendations on where to take your (presumably) small baby to have blunt metal shoved through her ears, without anaesthesia or paint relief.

My ILs are also Indian, and this subject has been raised a number of times with me. My reply? "I don't want her ears pierced. If SHE decides she wants them pierced, and she's old enough to take responsibility for them, then I'll consider it. I don't want to shove metal through my child's ears for absolutely no reason". End of. And repeat.

Piercing guns cannot be sterilised and the shitty cartridge things you can buy are barbaric.

Don't dress up your post as being resistant to a 'tradition', when you're actually just looking for someone to mutilate your baby in exchange for money.

This ☝🏻

I agree! At the very least she is open to the idea or she wouldn’t be looking at earrings and asking where to go to get it done.

She hasn’t acknowledged any of the risks people have alerted her to and has instead focused on the fact that other people do it as further justification that it’s ok for her.

Her poor baby!

Hi OP! I don't think anyones been very helpful to you. Regardless of when you get your child's ears pierced- that's your decision and if it's something that you decide is right for your child now, then do it.

Usually, when ears are pierced but the likes of Claire's it's done via an earring 'gun' and they'll have specific earrings that are suitable to use, so your best of finding earrings when you're in there. Having said that, I wouldn't recommend you go to Claire's to piece your babies ears.

Professional piercers will use a needle to piece followed by inserting an earring of your choice (I think, I've never had this done but this is what I've heard) and I think the earrings you've found are a good choice because the pointed backs are completely covered. I've seen many babies with the same earring backs. Also, you'd have to check how big the actual front of the earrings are. I'd think the smaller they were the better, as they'd be less visible. According to many on here a professional piercer won't do a baby so then you've solved the problem- you can tel your Inlaws it's not possible till x age.

There's also another option in-between the two above options. It's called the Inverness ear piercing. And is similar to the 'gun' method in that it uses an earring to pierce the hole. However, it's controlled in that the piercer will 'push' the earring through in a controlled manner rather than it being shot through. This system also has its own selection of suitable earrings that are fully sealed etc.

I don't know what other options there are but these are the ones I know of. You can google and see what's close to you and what works for you.

Having said all of that, if you don't want to have your child's ears pierced. Don't. You're her parent and need to advocate for her, now when she doesn't have a choice in the matter and from now on when she needs your support.

Good luck!

SunnyD44 · Today 09:31
If you don’t want it done then why are you doing it?
I know in some cultures it’s the norm but so is FGM would you also allow that to happen?

JasmineIndigo · Today 10:17
You are comparing piercing a baby's ears with FGM?! I've read some bonkers things on MN over the years and this has got to be up there.
OP of course it's up to you if you want to pierce her ears, but it's not really weird - probably best in general not to call your partner's cultural traditions 'weird' if you want harmonious relationships with them.

I wholeheartedly agree with you @JasmineIndigo It is ludicrous, IMO, to compare FGM with ear piercing!! And whilst some might deem other's cultures 'different' to theirs, to label them as 'weird' is insulting (at best)!

You'd abuse your baby to keep your partner?

Wow.

How can you compare ear piercing with FGM? Behave.

My husband is Indian and I have two girls. There were some suggestions we pierce the eldest's ears when she was tiny from various aunties. I just said no thanks, we're going to wait til she is old enough to decide herself. They mentioned it a few times and I just kept saying that I'll let her decide. It helped that my husband didn't like the idea of hurting his child unnecessarily either, despite cultural "tradition". They eventually stopped mentioning it, no drama.
My eldest got hers pierced last week she 11. Cannot imagine ever doing that to a baby. It's horrible.
Stick up for your child; you're her advocate. Why on earth anyone would inflict pain on a baby for cosmetic purposes only is beyond me. It should be illegal.

I have seen girls with ripped earlobes. Babies have a lot of rough and tumble before they are grown up. I would say no.

They can't be that insistent on tradition if you are not married to your partner. You/they managed to skip that one, so make this another one to skip.

I think any cultural tradition that impacts an individual that cannot consent to or accept willingly that tradition, is bollocks, I don't care what it is. FGM, ear piercing, child marriage, circumcism, child labour, whatever.

She’s not. She’s using FGM to illustrate that tradition is not a good enough reason to do something!

sadly, I think you’re right. Poor baby.

Just like if a child wants to do something daft because a friend does it and you say “if your friend jumped off a cliff would you do it too?!” An extreme example to make a point.

You think you might lose your partner because you don't want to pierce your baby's ears?

The piercing is not the problem.