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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

To not know why he says this stupid thing and how to answer

131 replies

OneSugarOneSpoon · 09/08/2022 22:30

BF of 7 months has this wierd habit of having a conversation with me that goes like this..
Eg . He will say something along the lines of " right I'm going now as I need to collect My daughter" . I'll say " ok" then he will reply " oh great...so you want me to leave then?" Or something similar. Same if he asks do if I mind if he goes playing golf or whatever...I say no..then I get this silly " oh don't you want to be with me then?"

It can be about anything really, but he often does it in relation to his kids ( "Alice wants to sit by me...oh you've let her...don't you want to be next to me then "etc etc)

I've actually started being quite snappy back as I've no idea what he's trying to achieve. Otherwise he is fine , but this totally winds me up.

Any thoughts wise MNetters?

OP posts:

Report

LemonRedwood · 09/08/2022 22:32

Tell him to stop acting like a child.

AnyFucker · 09/08/2022 22:37

He is a childish cock. Why do you engage with that shit ?

Soapboxqueen · 09/08/2022 22:39

There isn't a correct answer. That's the point. He just wants to have a go.

Bin him off. I couldn't be arsed with that.

FurAndFeathers · 09/08/2022 22:41

He’s desperately insecure and telling you that your world should be revolving around him.
how dare you function without being by his side?

bin him

AWOIF · 09/08/2022 22:44

Sounds like an absolute twat.

MadMadMadamMim · 09/08/2022 22:44

Silly games. I'd have raised an eyebrow at him the first time and dumped him the second time he tried it on me.

Raise your standards and get rid.

RewildingAmbridge · 09/08/2022 22:45

He's either a massive clingy twat or he thinks he's being funny, and just has a really annoying and shit sense of humour, brother makes him a prize

RewildingAmbridge · 09/08/2022 22:46

*neither

CloseYourEyesAndSee · 09/08/2022 22:46

The answer is dump the dickhead

kittenkipping · 09/08/2022 22:51

At best he's got a dreadful sense of humour and doesn't see normal social cues that a joke doesn't land so continuously repeats it.

But, If he's doing this in front of his children (giving his daughter the impression that you could demand the seat, or that you two should what? Fight over it? Take turns? ) he's a misogynist dick happy to teach his daughter that he , a man, should be fought over and prioritised by everyone around him. Subconsciously she'll think that's normal in a loving relationship and when she in turn gets with a needy misogynistic dick the cycle will begin again.

Either way, drop him back in the sea. This one is not good eating.

youlightupmyday · 09/08/2022 22:53

Seven months? This will only get worse..

Decidualcast · 09/08/2022 22:57

Urrgghhhh.

SunshineAndFizz · 09/08/2022 22:57

Jeez that sounds painful.

decayingmatter · 09/08/2022 22:59

And you have sex with this guy?

Hyvsvaar · 09/08/2022 23:03

This is immature and an underhand way of having a go. I have absolutely no patience for this type of bollocks and would be extremely snippy in my response

Christ what a man child this would do my head in

EmmaH2022 · 09/08/2022 23:24

Does he say it as a joke?

WeeOrcadian · 09/08/2022 23:28

Is he secretly 4 years old?

Brigante9 · 09/08/2022 23:45

God, I just could not be arsed with the sheer dumbness of this. Is he hugely insecure and needs to you rend your clothes and beg him not to leave you to collect his child in case you die without him for 20 minutes? Fucking hell.

LightDrizzle · 09/08/2022 23:52

How can you bear it? My eyes rolled just reading it.

Dump him and find a grown up with an IQ in treble digits.

SkiingIsHeaven · 10/08/2022 00:10

Just say "Yes, I was you to go and enjoy yourself"

If he doesn't get a reaction he will soon get bored.

Alternatively, LTB.

pictish · 10/08/2022 00:19

Agree with the others. Not a good sign tbh. Twisting your words and making you explain yourself even if presented as jest, is shitty. He’s having sport with you but not in a fun way.

excitingusername · 10/08/2022 00:22

So much harshness here. Man has a silly habit that he needs clear communication out of. He's not psychic, it needs coherent and consistent flagging so he can work on stopping it!

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pictish · 10/08/2022 00:23

You could answer, “Fuck off you stupid prick.”
See how he likes them apples.

LadyWithLapdog · 10/08/2022 00:27

He sounds needy and this is off putting. What does he say when you’re snappy, does he get it?

TooBigForMyBoots · 10/08/2022 00:27

Dump him now @OneSugarOneSpoon or he'll do it one day and you will murder him and it will be a dreadful palaver for everyone.

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