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Original poster

Why would he be wearing his 'sexy' underwear to work?

396 replies

Excuses5000 · 04/08/2022 22:14

I've NC for this as it's embarrassing.

So my partner works nights in a manual labour job and always has done. Tonight before he left he bent down to give our DD a kiss goodnight and I noticed he was wearing certain underwear.

He only ever wears that underwear when sex is on the cards. He bought it entirely for my benefit or so I thought. It doesn't do much for me to be honest as I'm not particularly into extravagant pants but there we go.

They're not 'everyday' boxers and definitely not the sort of thing you'd want on display to your colleagues which would definitely be the case as there's alot of bending and lifting in his job. Think moving boxes etc.

It took me by surprise so I asked him why he was wearing his "sexy" underwear to work. He said "I'm not" to which I replied that I'd just seen them.

He was tripping over himself to explain how its because they're comfortable and airy. He sweats alot at work and gets hot. He then went on to say that he had put a towel in his bag aswell to use to wipe his head and face when he gets too hot.

Based on my OP alone would you find it suspicious?

OP posts:
NettleTea · 04/08/2022 23:08

yes, definately not cooler to wear - they will be sweaty as hell. I thought you were going to say a pair of Calvin Kleins or something, but those are definate sex pants

925XX · 04/08/2022 23:09

You dont need to go, just send a note in a taxi.

TheUnexpectedPickle · 04/08/2022 23:09

Excuses5000 · 04/08/2022 23:03

Picture attached.

I've given him no reason to think anything is 'wrong' at all, barring asking why he's wearing that underwear to work.

I didn't respond to his text about milk and nappies for, what, 20 minutes or so and that then caused him to follow up.

He's definitely up to something isn't he.

Oh.

Yes. Yes he is. If there was nothing to it he’d not even think twice about the conversation.

You deserve so much better than this idiot.

Beepbeepenergy · 04/08/2022 23:11

Sorry but he’s definitely cheating x

1982mommaof4 · 04/08/2022 23:12

Suspicious because he lied! Play it cool and keep your 👀👀👀

Eyesopenwideawake · 04/08/2022 23:12

Guilty as fuck. Sorry.

Ducksallovertheplace · 04/08/2022 23:12

Yeah that’s way too much over explaining in that text. Plus nothing about those pants are going to be comfortable and less sweaty doing what sounds like a fairly physical job. Sorry OP but I think you’re instincts are right here.

Milkand2sugarsplease · 04/08/2022 23:13

Definitely seems suspicious I'm afraid.

Trouble is, he may well be at work with the person he's cheating with/wants to cheat with/whatever he's up to so sending a note to work would reach him but not confirm anything for you.

It sounds like he knows he's been rumbled so he's gonna be on to a very quick damage control operation - deleting messages, phone logs etc.

Can you check bank statements etc to see if there is any h usual spending going on...?

Milkand2sugarsplease · 04/08/2022 23:14

*unusual spending

1982mommaof4 · 04/08/2022 23:15

YoSofi · 04/08/2022 22:50

I’d be suspicious too, but also wary of showing my cards too soon and giving him time to cover his tracks.

If you feel like you need more proof, and remember you don’t need it - if you’re unhappy you can leave, you need to play the long game.

can you access his phone? Online banking? I would pretend all was fine and do some digging in the background x

This

Original poster
Excuses5000 · 04/08/2022 23:16

MakeadealwithGod · 04/08/2022 23:08

Are you thinking he is with someone at work or that he hasn’t gone to work at all?

I really don't know. When he was having an affair it was with a work colleague and he managed to cover it up well for the first couple of months and I was completely oblivious. It was only when he started going awol for hours when he was due home that I became suspicious.

That work colleague is no longer on the scene as he transferred to a different branch and afaik hasn't had any contact with her in years.

It could be her and he's back in touch again, somebody new at this workplace or somebody completely unrelated to work.

OP posts:
InFiveMins · 04/08/2022 23:16

Very dodgy. He is protesting way too much.

1982mommaof4 · 04/08/2022 23:18

Excuses5000 · 04/08/2022 23:03

Picture attached.

I've given him no reason to think anything is 'wrong' at all, barring asking why he's wearing that underwear to work.

I didn't respond to his text about milk and nappies for, what, 20 minutes or so and that then caused him to follow up.

He's definitely up to something isn't he.

Eeek sorry sounds like he's flapping

Pandapop101 · 04/08/2022 23:18

Excuses5000 · 04/08/2022 23:03

Picture attached.

I've given him no reason to think anything is 'wrong' at all, barring asking why he's wearing that underwear to work.

I didn't respond to his text about milk and nappies for, what, 20 minutes or so and that then caused him to follow up.

He's definitely up to something isn't he.

The so what’s wrong message just seems like he is fishing for what else you know..

It does seem a bit strange otherwise he would have just said initially when asked oh I wear these because x, y, z.

Hard to say really but you know him best trust your instinct, stay calm and explain to him your feelings when you can have a proper conversation.

Manchester1990 · 04/08/2022 23:19

I feel very sorry for you, he is 100% cheating on you. I’d hazard a guess and say either a work colleague or visiting escorts.

ask him for a selfie at work now

TugboatAnnie · 04/08/2022 23:19

He lied. He blurted. He mentioned a towel to stop you looking in his bag. The bizarre texting is him knowing he's fucked up. Loser.

1982mommaof4 · 04/08/2022 23:19

Why don't you make him FaceTime you on his break?

Original poster
Excuses5000 · 04/08/2022 23:20

I'm not going to reply to his messages for atleast an hour and see if he sends anything else. He's obviously sweating about it and getting nervous. What a bastard.

OP posts:
925XX · 04/08/2022 23:21

If he did not want you to look in his bag, what would be in it?

1982mommaof4 · 04/08/2022 23:22

Excuses5000 · 04/08/2022 23:20

I'm not going to reply to his messages for atleast an hour and see if he sends anything else. He's obviously sweating about it and getting nervous. What a bastard.

😞😞😞

Perfectlystill · 04/08/2022 23:22

I would have a snoop about at home for any further evidence. Receipts? Aftershave missing as he's taken it to work?

Sorry you're going through this OP

Original poster
Excuses5000 · 04/08/2022 23:22

1982mommaof4 · 04/08/2022 23:19

Why don't you make him FaceTime you on his break?

Brilliant idea in theory but I just know what he'd come back with. We don't video call one another, never have actually, so he'd come back with some bollocks about how he doesn't know how to do it or it isn't working.

I think I will ask him for a selfie at work. He can't worm his way out of that one.

OP posts:
wizzywig · 04/08/2022 23:23

And the towel? He is probably having a shower afterwards . Ugh!

Mysteriousnotice · 04/08/2022 23:23

He's got form.
Your gut is telling you something.
I suspect he will be nice as piefoe a while. He's spooked for sure.

Johnnysgirl · 04/08/2022 23:23

Such a lot of detail as to why he's wearing his sex pants... Including the fact that they don't chav.