Why would he be wearing his 'sexy' underwear to work?

[Excuses5000]

I've NC for this as it's embarrassing.

So my partner works nights in a manual labour job and always has done. Tonight before he left he bent down to give our DD a kiss goodnight and I noticed he was wearing certain underwear.

He only ever wears that underwear when sex is on the cards. He bought it entirely for my benefit or so I thought. It doesn't do much for me to be honest as I'm not particularly into extravagant pants but there we go.

They're not 'everyday' boxers and definitely not the sort of thing you'd want on display to your colleagues which would definitely be the case as there's alot of bending and lifting in his job. Think moving boxes etc.

It took me by surprise so I asked him why he was wearing his "sexy" underwear to work. He said "I'm not" to which I replied that I'd just seen them.

He was tripping over himself to explain how its because they're comfortable and airy. He sweats alot at work and gets hot. He then went on to say that he had put a towel in his bag aswell to use to wipe his head and face when he gets too hot.

Based on my OP alone would you find it suspicious?

Hmmm, I’ve read the full thread and a lot of people seem very ready to feed your anxiety on this. When I read your posts OP, I just thought his explanations were reasonable and he was probably panicking because you were clearly suspicious of something. I think he was trying to reassure you, and being a bit over the top with it. Plus likely to have been a bit embarrassed by being ‘caught’ wearing those pants as he knows he wouldn’t usually wear them to work. His explanation sounds entirely plausible to me.

Anyone have a pic of these sexy pants?

I would give him the benefit of the doubt for now. I wouldn't look at his phone either. They aren't always very bright, he'd probably give himself away sooner or later.

Yes, I am baffled by them!

Honestly I believe him. You've clearly implied something js going off so I think that explains his panicking. It sounds like the pants are the same kinda fabric as tights which are far more comfortable than pants. You've found them in the wash, so it's not the first time he's worn them. I don't think it's a red flag in its own right

@Excuses5000 my first thought reading your op was that he was embarrassed. I wondered if maybe it’s a kinky thing for him and got caught out. As I read through the responses I was quickly persuaded that he was cheating. He has had a lot of time away at work to come up with reasons and excuses. Only he really knows the truth and if he told you the last time surely he would tell you now. Have a good think about this and what you want to do next. It’s easy to be swayed by peoples opinions but they don’t know for a fact. I think snooping at his phone and asking for work photos mean there is no trust and things will take a downward spiral from here on in. This is the problem with forgiving a cheat, it’s always there to niggle at you later on. I hope for you and your kids he has kept it in his sexy boxers.

Like this?

Oh my!

Those look like something I would keep carrots in.

This thread is completely batshit. Taking a towel to work = he’s taking it to wipe his dick after having illicit sex??!!

Haha! 😂😂
I'm following with interest OP as it does sound odd. Maybe he just thinks after last time he needs to explain everything and gets panicked if you think he's being unfaithful, but it does sound odd. I hope you get some answers

Haha! 😂😂
I'm following with interest OP as it does sound odd. Maybe he just thinks after last time he needs to explain everything and gets panicked if you think he's being unfaithful, but it does sound odd. I hope you get some answers

This 😂

Those look like something I would keep carrots in.

And a couple of Brussels Sprouts.

@speakout 🤣🤣🤣🤣 just spat my drink out, thanks for that

In all fairness though if they are pants like that I would DEFINITELY be suspicious... Ok they may not chaf but you don't wear pants like that to work

To the posters who are making fun of the underwear please remember that this is someone's life. Another person in understandably a huge amount of distress. We all like a laugh but come on. OP sees these comments too

He doesn’t need all the night to cheat, he can be visiting someone before/after work and telling them he needs to go to work.

Or he may be totally honest and just worried about losing your trust again as the last time.

As someone said, it is your relationship OP, I would keep an eye on him just in case but wouldn’t do anything drastic that could damage the relationship or that I may regret unless you find some more solid evidence that he is actually cheating.

Tbf op says she they don’t do anything for her either.

Yes, I am baffled by them!

you don’t really need to like them though do you? It’s entirely irrelevant to the Initial post and I imagine it’s embarrassing to the OP to have all these comments about “ ewww who would wear those” or “grim” or any of the other unhelpful comments being made. We get it….give it a rest.

Can I just say that I do sometimes overexplain things, when I am completely innocent, if I feel I am being questioned. I am aware it can make me look guilty but I spent a long time in an abusive relationship and it came from there I think. So he may be innocent.

How big is the towel? Are there showers at work? A small towel suggests wiping off sweat or insulating a plastic water bottle - though an ice pack would perform more effectively. A full or king-size towel or one of those sheet things, suggests having an actual shower. I hesitate to think that wiping yourself after sex would be anyone's idea of a brainwave, if you're going to bring it into the home and put it in the washing machine with the family laundry.

Yeah I don't think he's taken the towel for sexual reasons! My dad's an overweight gardener and sweats buckets! I'm not overweight but I sweat loads too. I did a massive de-weed of the garden two days ago and I'm early 30's and still hurting. I never knew sweat in the eyes stings so bad lol.

Plenty of men seem to like wearing mesh and even lace boxers - have you read the reviews on M&S and Lovehoney?

M&S seems to get a lot of blokes writing creepy-sounding reviews about wearing women's knickers. I get the impression they're for cross-dressing but a gay mate of mine buys mesh from Lovehoney. He says they're a quarter of the price for similar from a site catering to gay men.

Agree it might be odd for work as he'd get a royal ribbing from his mates if they were seen. If he sweats a lot the mesh is probably better than standard cotton.

I hope it's simply a case of that, OP.

Does he work with any ladies? Could he be shagging them at work?

Or maybe one of the lads?